52 Pick Up
by Roseoptic
Summary: When Yumi Taka was accepted to Ouran Academy, she thought she had found her jar of Orange Marmalade. But when she discovers Haruhi's secret her whole life goes awry and finds her jar to be empty. Not wanting to drop it, she descends into the Host Club's adventures. And maybe, on the way back, she can fill her jar with just a little bit of Honey.
1. Meeting Alice

**Full Summary:** Some girls grow tired watching their sibling on the banks of a river. However, some girls are too busy working to merely grow tired watching. When Yumi Taka was accepted to Ouran Academy, she thought she had found her jar of Orange Marmalade. However, when she discovers Haruhi's "little secret", her whole life goes awry. After a chase bullying incident, she finds her jar of marmalade to be frightfully empty. Not wanting to drop the jar, she descends into the adventures of the Host Club and Wonderland. Can they help her find her way home? Will she even want to go home afterwards? Most importantly, can they help her find herself? And just maybe, on the way back, she can fill her jar with just a little bit of Honey.

* * *

 **Meeting Alice**

 **Chapter One**

Yumi Taka was hard at work in one of Ouran Academy's many greenhouses. Technically, students at Ouran Academy weren't supposed to have part time jobs. Yumi was a special case, as she was employee to Ouran before she was a student. It was the only way a "commoner" like Yumi could ever even hope to afford the school.

Yumi was certain that she was getting a ridiculously good deal. Although a lot of workers at Ouran took advantage of thee employee discount and had their kids enrolled at Ouran, they were all in D rank classes. Yumi was in B rank, though she didn't feel like she earned it. She had gotten second place in the competition for the academic scholarship, which was just another way of saying she had lost. Still, she had been moved from D to B, so all the studying she had done hadn't been a complete wash.

"Taka!"

Yumi jerked, nearly cutting off a flower bud instead of just pruning it.

"Yes, Gādenā-san?" Yumi yelled back as she set down her tools.

The head gardener, and the woman addressing Yumi, was Watanabe Hana, an elderly woman whose hearing was beginning to go. Yumi had to talk very loudly to be heard, even when she was standing close.

The elderly gardener bustled her way over to Yumi, scowling as usual. Hana wasn't very cheerful woman about anything outside of Ouran's gardens. Yumi assumed this meant whatever problem Hana had it didn't involved Yumi or her work.

"That Host Club needs a delivery," the gardener grumbled, proving Yumi half-right, though she was aware how much the half that she was wrong mattered.

"Host Club?" Yumi asked.

Yumi had heard about it, of course. It was impossible to be a student at Ouran and not hear about the notorious Host Club whether from its official fan-club or from the boys complaining bitterly about 'impossible standards'. That said, Yumi couldn't say she knew much about the club or what it did, outside of freaking out the school body to the afore mentioned different extremes.

"A club filled with flamboyant, silly men and ridiculous girls," Hana groused not one to soften her opinion. "Whenever I send their deliveries my girls never come back on time! And when they _do,_ they've usually given that club a huge discount. Even when I send men they get side-tracked!" Hana threw her wrinkling arms in the air, "I'd send Katsuo-san, but he's too old to be pushing around such a heavy cart."

Hana gave Yumi a sidelong look. Yumi decidedly did not the twist this conversation was taking.

"But you, Taka-san. You're responsible. You're hardly one of those silly, frivolous, little girls who frequent that club..."

Usually Yumi would have enjoyed winning compliments from the hard, but fair, Hana. However, in this case, Yumi found herself more wary than flattered.

"I need you to take the delivery up to the Host Club, Taka-san. They're in Music Room 3. Here's the receipt." Hana pressed a piece of thin paper into Yumi's hands.

Yumi had been about to protest but when she cast her eyes down at the recepit and the listed price, she felt like she had been sucker punched.

"Why do they need this many tropical plants?! There are _trees_ on this list, Gādenā-san!"

This school was filled with rich bastards if they could afford this, she thought as she scanned the list.

Hana sighed deeply, "Like I said, they're silly."

Yumi stared at Hana. She could only wonder how much the old woman had seen in her life that an order like this only inspired exasperation.

"Don't worry Gādenā-san, I will bring you your money promptly!" Yumi accepted her mission with gusto, pushing aside her previous wariness. She didn't know what sort of people the Host Club were, but she was sure she had handled worse. If Hana had faith in her, how hard could it really be?

* * *

Yumi regretted agreeing to the task almost immediately. The cart was heavy, though she had been spared having to load the thing. Not only did Yumi have to put her back into each push just to get the cart rolling, but she couldn't see over the top of it. It was a cold comfort that Yumi's height, for once, wasn't the cause of the problem. The mini palm trees were hard for anyone to see over.

The Host Club had ordered more than what Yumi was bringing. Hana had sent others with the bulk of it, however she was sending Yumi with the last of it and the most important part, the receipt, so she could collect the payment. That role that was apparently the hardest.

After taking the service elevator and driving down the mostly deserted hallways, Yumi reached the doors of Music Room 3.

"Woah! This place is huge," Yumi gasped as she wheeled her cart in. She wasn't sure why a music room needed to be this large, but it was impressive.

"The delivery is here! Jun-chan is here!" A childish voice shouted with cheer.

Though not "Jun-chan", Yumi could guess who "Jun-chan" was. Sato Junko, who was working her way through college - not Ouran's college - by working in the gardening department. Yumi hadn't spoken to her much since Junko worked odd hours to fit her schedule and Yumi tended to avoid people in general. Before Yumi's mind could drift towards what she knew about Junko, there was a blur of yellow flying directly at her.

Had Yumi been Junko, in the yellow blur's defense, she would have been almost a foot taller, and probably expecting the blur. Yumi was, however, Yumi, so she was shorter, lighter, and completely unprepared. The human shaped blur crashed into Yumi. They both let out grunts of surprise and fell to the tiled floor. Yumi tumbled onto her back. She had rough housed enough with the boys in her old neighborhood to know how to fall properly. Even with the blur's weight on top of her, Yumi knew to curl her head in to protect it from the hard floor and to slap the ground as she fell. The fall was still painful, but at least she hadn't hurt herself severely.

After gathering herself, Yumi realized that there were warm, watery, brown eyes inches away from her face that stared down at her in growing shock and panic. Perhaps Yumi was a little more jostled then she was willing to admit, since the first thought that registered in her mind was how pretty those eyes were.

Then the blonde blur was scrambling off of her. "Ah! I'm so sorry! I thought you were Jun-chan!"

Yumi shook her head freeing herself from the haze the fall and the blonde blur had put her in. The blond blur was, actually, an incredibly short blonde boy who looked like he belonged in middle-school not high-school, though his uniform argued differently.

"It's fine; I'm fine." Yumi tried to reassure him after dazedly watching the boy panic for a few seconds. Her delayed response and slightly unfocused eyes probably didn't help her attempts to reassure him.

The boy offered his hand and when Yumi took it, she was easily pulled her to her feet. He lifted her so easily Yumi almost lost her footing again. Though Yumi was light, the boy was also surprisingly strong.

"Hani-senpai! You must be careful with princesses!"

Suddenly Yumi found herself pulled away from the short blonde into the arms of another blonde, this time considerably taller and with a distinct, exotic look.

"My lady, are you hurt?" He asked her huskily, staring down into her eyes.

Yumi stared at him in confusion rather than infatuation, which seemed to spark some confusion in his strange eyes.

"I've never seen eyes like that." She noted sounding more curious then lovestruck.

"Are you intoxicated by my beauty?" The boy attempted to recover the mood that Yumi was rapidly, and unwittingly, crushing.

Yumi arched an eyebrow. Whatever stupid, girly stupor that had fallen over her by the, admittedly, very handsome boys, shattered with those corny words. So this is what had the other assistants failing in their duty.

Yumi's first thought was that they must be trying to charm her out of paying full price for their flowers. She was affronted by the notion that these boys, who spent more money in day then Yumi was likely to see in a month, were trying to get a cheapened price for their ridiculous and _unnecessary_ flowers. Her mind stalled on that assumption and Yumi couldn't move past it.

"No." She said simply and coldly.

The boy let her go, obviously crushed, and threw himself into a dark corner of the room. Yumi's over active imagination pictured it to be much darker than it actually was.

"Huh. That was easy." Yumi wasn't sure if she was more surprised by his sudden mood shift or how easily he had given up.

She held up the receipt. "Alright, who's in charge? I have a delivery!"

A crowd of very attractive boys had gathered around the petite teen. There were twin boys who were giving her an amused look. Yumi detected a gleam in their eyes that she distinctly did not like. There was a tall, very well built man who was comforting the boy who was a little shorter than Yumi (which made Yumi very happy since _no one was ever_ shorter than her). Out of the crowd, it was a boy with glasses who approached her. Yumi knew how people with power walked, she could tell he was the leader immediately.

"Ah, Taka Yumi, I was wondering when Watanabe would send you."

Yumi was surprised that he both knew both her name and that Watanabe would be sending her. She refrained from reacting because she could tell he _wanted_ her to be surprised and to give him a chance to show off. Perhaps if Yumi were in a better mood she would have humored him, but she had been called away from her very quiet and calming duty of pruning in the greenhouse. Yumi didn't get greenhouse duty often, and it was much better than working under the hot afternoon sun, and she was missing it because of these fools.

"Watanabe-san was concerned about all the... mistakes... in payment that were being made." Yumi was smiling politely, but her eyes were honed in on "Four Eyes" - as she had unkindly dubbed him. She wanted to be very clear that she would not be toyed with like the others.

"She was very wise in sending you, Taka-san."

Yumi's eyes narrowed. "I don't believe we've met." Her response was automatic, but she had given the boy what he wanted.

"I am Ootori Kyoya."

Clearly Yumi was supposed to react to this, but the boy was overestimating how much she knew about rich families. Yumi blinked twice.

Apparently his introduction spurred more introductions that seemed to be strangely _rehearsed_.

"He's Kaoru," A red head said, suddenly in front of her eyes.

"And he's Hikaru," an identical face said, much too close for Yumi's comfort.

"And we're the Hiitachi twins." They said together as they threw their arms around each other's shoulders in way that was far too intimate for brothers.

Yumi stumbled back in surprise, bumping into her cart.

"Please respect my personal space," she half-snapped at the twins, barely managing to rein in her sharp tone. Her hand shot out, catching hold of the handle of her cart to keep it from going anywhere. There would be no disasters on her watch.

They straightened and grinned at her reaction in a way that Yumi did not like.

"I'm Haninozuka Mitsukuni! And I'm very sorry for knocking you over. This is Morinozuka Takashi, but everyone calls us 'Hani' and 'Mori'!"

Yumi found that it was hard not to be charmed by Mitsukuni. He seemed to sparkle as he spoke and Yumi's over active imagination imagined a floral background behind him. She didn't have a sassy response for him. Instead she had a rather stupid response that would have made her sound like one of the ridiculous girls who chose to come to this club - so she checked it and kept quiet.

"You're a little young to be a gardener, aren't you?" He asked, tilting his head.

Yumi's cheeks flushed up with embarrassment at his observation. He noticed and seemed more confused by her distress.

"Taka-san is working for Ouran Academy in exchange for her education here," Kyoya said, scribbling something into a black notebook.

Yumi was becoming more and more uneasy at Kyoya's knowledge of her. She wasn't important enough to warrant anyone's attention and she took a lot of steps to ensure that she never caught the wrong person's attention. Apparently she had still managed to.

"Oh, so she's a commoner like Haruhi?" Mitsukuni asked. "Does that mean she's a hero too?"

Yumi ignored the commoner remark, that she was used to, and the hero remark was too silly to spend any thought on. However, the name Mitsukuni mentioned stood out to her.

"Haruhi?" Yumi mused aloud. She had definitely heard that name before. For a second she mused on where she heard the name. Then it came to her, "Oh! that's the girl who won the scholarship." Yumi sighed at the painful memory.

She didn't notice how everyone in the room seemed to freeze.

"I tried to win it," she explained, "but oh well, good for her. I already had this job lined up, so its probably more fair that I lost. That way both of us get to go."

That said, Yumi was a little envious that Haruhi got to go to the school and didn't have to work on the side like she did.

After her musing, Yumi was back to business. The Host Club was surprisingly good at being distracting. Yumi closed the few paces that were between her and Kyoya and handed him the receipt. He mutely handed her a check with a generous tip. Yumi was so wrapped up in the size of the tip that she didn't notice the wooden way Kyoya was moving or how you could see the gears of his mind turning simply by looking at him.

She just grinned to herself and headed out the door.

Hana would be happy with her and Yumi could put the extra money away for a rainy day. Being a delivery girl to the Host Club wasn't that bad after all. Yumi walked away completely unaware of the storm about to break behind her. As soon as the door was shut and her footsteps faded down the hallway, the Host Club exploded.

* * *

"Kyo-chan! How does Yu-chan know about Haru-chan!" Mitsukuni cried in distress the second Yumi's footsteps faded down the hallway.

"Who exactly is that girl?!" The twins shouted, concerned.

Kyoya stepped in smoothly, "Taka Yumi, class 2-B. She participated in the scholarship contest with Haruhi and a few others over the summer."

"If she was already in with a job, why would she try to get a scholarship?" Hikaru asked displeased and taking it out on Yumi.

"Taka-san works long hours in the gardening department both before and after school and on Saturday. I'm sure she was looking for a way to get her education for free so that she could work less or keep the money she made." Kyoya informed them. "Her grades weren't half bad, considering her lesser education prior to Ouran, but Haruhi blew all the contestants out of the water."

Tamaki, always the dramatic one, jumped in, "What if she resents Haruhi for stealing away her scholarship?! She could oust her secret!"

Mitsukuni frowned, "She didn't seem resentful of Haru-chan... she even said it was good that she won, so that they could both come."

Takashi nodded, backing up Mitsukuni silently.

Kyoya shut his book shut with a snap, "Taka-san might not want to sabotage Haruhi but she is unaware that Haruhi is pretending to be a boy. If one of our guests mentions Haruhi to Taka-san, Taka-san might let it slip not knowing better."

"I'm sure if we just ask Yu-chan she'll be happy to keep it a secret!" Mitsukuni announced optimistically.

Kyoya pursed his lips, clearly not liking the idea of being in the debt of someone else.

"Yes, we'll talk to her." He said simply, not exactly saying that they would simply "ask" Yumi to keep it a secret for them.

* * *

A/N: Please favorite and review!~

last edited: 10/20/15


	2. Spotting the White Rabbit

**Full Summary:** Some girls grow tired watching their sibling on the banks of a river. However, some girls are too busy working to merely grow tired watching. When Yumi Taka was accepted to Ouran Academy, she thought she had found her jar of Orange Marmalade. However, when she discovers Haruhi's "little secret", her whole life goes awry. After a chase bullying incident, she finds her jar of marmalade to be frightfully empty. Not wanting to drop the jar, she descends into the adventures of the Host Club and Wonderland. Can they help her find her way home? Will she even want to go home afterwards? Most importantly, can they help her find herself? And just maybe, on the way back, she can fill her jar with just a little bit of Honey.

* * *

 **Chapter Two**

 **Spotting the White Rabbit**

Yumi awoke to the smell of baking bread. It was much better than the smells that she used to wake up to back in Karuizawa. The smell of a group home packed with teens and kids was nothing like the smell of a bakery. Grudgingly, Yumi swung herself up into a sitting position. She reminded herself just how lucky she was to have gotten where she was - to give herself the motivation she needed to get up and dressed when all she wanted to do was sleep more.

Getting from Karuizawa to Tokyo was really just a combination of luck and guts. By chance, Yumi had met Inoue Tarou the previous summer when he had gotten a flat tire just outside of Karuizawa. He had a spare, but wasn't able to change it on his own. Yumi had helped. At the time, Yumi didn't know that Tarou worked in Ouran Academy's staffing department. She hadn't asked him for anything for fixing his tire and when he offered to repay her she just told him that the sight of a fully grown man not knowing how to change his own tire was payment enough. She hadn't expected Tarou to remember her when a job opened up.

Tarou didn't have to the weight to get her the job, but an interview was more than Yumi could have swung on her own, and a letter of recommendation from a member of Ouran's own staff was no small thing either. Yumi had seen the writing on the wall as soon as she had gotten off the phone with Tarou. An opportunity like this wasn't likely to show up again, so Yumi had left Karuizawa for Tokyo on only the chance of employment.

It seemed like too slim a chance to jump at, but in Karuizawa there weren't a lot of jobs for group home kids. They were considered trouble, and weren't trusted. It wasn't entirely unwarranted. A lot of the kids who had lived in the group home were trouble, understandably, given their various pasts. Nobody came without some sort of baggage. The truth of the matter was even if Yumi hadn't gotten the job she would have been in Tokyo, a place where nobody knew anything about her or her past. It would have been easier to get a job in Tokyo then back home.

Yumi struggled into her work clothes. A shirt with overalls and ratty shoes that were nearly falling apart. She had been doubtful when this chance first fallen into her lap that she would even have the resources to get to Tokyo. Mostly because Yumi didn't have _any_ tangible resources. What she did have, was the kind Youko Suzuki - who had taken an interest in Yumi's future when Yumi had volunteered to help the elderly woman around her house. Suzuki just so happened to have a young, ambitious granddaughter in Tokyo who had opened up a bakery. Her granddaughter also just so happened to have a room above her bakery that she wasn't using. And she just so happened to be in need of an extra hand with a pair of twins who had just reached school age but were still a handful. And just like that, Yumi had bed and board in Tokyo. All she had needed after that, was the job.

Still Yumi thought, as she carefully packed her nicer clothes into the bottom of her backpack to change into after her morning shift in the gardens, she had never even imagined she would get an _education_ at Ouran. That part had been completely unplanned. It had just fallen into her lap. Tarou hadn't told her that there was reduced tuition for staff. It had been just luck that the reduced tuition had worked out to almost exactly her paycheck. Yumi wasn't earning much money, but she was getting a world-class education. Yumi just had to hope that it would balance itself out.

Thinking back, Yumi thought, as she yanked her hair into a side ponytail that looked decent and kept her hair out of her face while she worked, it was unlikely that she would have ever been able to get a job in Karuizawa. It would have taken a lot of work to get over the "group home kid" stigma. It had only been after Yumi had proven herself reliable and had done a lot of work for free before people would let her do things like paint houses or fix fences. Yumi had been ecstatic when she gotten a job as a paper girl. If it had taken that much effort to get a kiddy job. Yumi wasn't sure that she would have ever won enough trust to get a stable job. Even though it meant moving away from the only friends she had ever had in her life, Yumi knew that she had made the best choice for her future.

She headed down the stairs that led to the bakery where Himura Tamiko was already baking up a storm. Her twin daughters, Sora and Emi were at their favorite table in the bakery furiously doing whatever homework they had forgotten to do over the weekend, and pretending that they weren't.

"Hey you!" Tamiko said scoldingly as Yumi slipped under the counter. "Don't you try to run off without breakfast!" She shook her rolling pin in Yumi's direction. The twins laughed at Yumi getting caught like she did every weekday morning. Yumi stuck her tongue out at the twins cheekily, before ducking back under the counter.

Her breakfast was sitting in its usual spot on one of the two stoves Tamiko had, keeping it warm. Tamiko always brought over breakfast for Yumi and lunch as well. The lunch Yumi never pretended to forget or attempted to leave behind, just in case Tamiko didn't catch her.

Yumi snatched up her breakfast, trying not to burn her hands and sat in what had become "her chair" in the corner of the kitchen area. If the twins weren't doing homework, she would have sat with them, but she was nice enough not to bring Tamiko's attention to them by sitting beside the twins.

"I don't know why you always try to sneak out without breakfast," Tamiko shook her head, giving Yumi another scolding look.

Yumi grinned in reply, "I like to keep you on your toes," she teased.

Honestly, Yumi liked being scolded by Tamiko. It was a reminder her that someone _cared_ enough to scold her. Yumi wouldn't do anything too troublesome. She didn't want to cause any trouble of Tamiko considering how much she was doing for her. But, pretending to sneak out without breakfast was a small enough thing. Tamiko had yet to get exasperated with Yumi about it, which was why Yumi kept doing it. It was a bit of a test, not that Yumi fully realized, to see just how long it would take until Tamiko stopped caring.

Tamiko shook her head at Yumi's explanation, "Eat." She instructed and Yumi obeyed without question. Tamiko's cooking was miles ahead of anything Yumi had back in Karuizawa, so Yumi ate anything Tamiko made for her gladly.

"How's school up at that prestigious academy you're going to?" Tamiko asked. She took it as a mark of personal pride that _her_ ward had managed to get a job at Ouran Acadamy.

"It's going fine, Tamiko-san."

"One of these days you'll be calling be oba-chan," Tamiko sighed at Yumi's insistence on formality and distance. "Are you making any friends?"

Yumi shrugged, "I'm a commoner, Tamiko-san." She said by way of explanation.

Tamiko frowned, "No, you're Taka Yumi, and you're wonderful."

Yumi shrugged again.

"Now you stop that, missy. Don't be so worried about what they think that you don't even try." Tamiko scolded lightly as she rolled out some bread.

Yumi froze. Tamiko saw right through her evasive, bullshit answers as usual.

"You know that's not fair to them or you, Yumi."

Yumi sighed. The rational part of her knew that Tamiko was right. That knowledge didn't make it any easier though. Every time Yumi had an opportunity to try to be friendly or make a friend, she couldn't help but think about what everyone must think of her.

"Don't you decide that you don't fit in for them," Tamiko advised, throwing flour at Yumi to bring her back out of her thoughts.

Yumi stuck out her tongue and wiped the flour off her face with her sleeve. "I'll keep that in mind, Tamiko-san." She said as finished up her breakfast with one final, large bite.

"Well, you 'keep that in mind', and maybe eventually act upon it." Tamiko replied with her usual amount of snark.

Yumi laughed off how true Tamiko's comment was and dumped her silverware into the sink. She began to wash it quickly, since she had gotten dressed fast this morning she had time to lighten the extra burden she added to Tamiko.

There was a short silence between the two, with just the sound of Tamiko's baking, the clanging of metal against metal and running water, and the furious scratching of pencils against paper.

"You should go out for a club," Tamiko suggested, breaking the silence.

"I have work." Yumi dismissed.

"Nice try, but I know they give you club hours to yourself. What club had you been looking at?"

"The gardening club," Yumi sassed. Tamiko hit Yumi lightly in the shoulder with a towel.

Answering more seriously, Yumi told Tamiko that she worked her club hours which allowed her to leave school earlier. "I'm _supposed_ to be helping you with the twins." Yumi reminded her.

"If I say you can go out for a club, I mean it. It's not a test," Tamiko told Yumi sternly, "Don't act like you don't help out around here already. You're a great help and I don't regret giving you my spare room for second. But don't you forget Yumi that you only have your youth for so long."

Yumi shrugged. In her opinion, she had done enough living in the moment back in Karuizawa. She didn't want to seem ungrateful. Although, to be perfectly honest, Yumi wasn't sure if she had the courage to try out for a club. Both she and Tamiko knew that, though to differing degrees of awareness. Yumi avoided acknowledging it, while Tamiko had figured it out after the first week of school. Yes, Yumi had other reasons for acting the way she did, but her avoiding rejection was the chief motivator. If it hadn't been just wanting to help out, perhaps Tamiko wouldn't be pressuring her so hard.

"School will be easier with friends."

"I have friends!" Yumi objected defensively.

"Friends from Karuizawa don't count."

Yumi winced. It was true. They really didn't count. She got a few calls from the group home but that wasn't enough to completely substitute social interaction. Especially when she was used to so much. Tamiko, her twins, and her husband couldn't fill the gap either, as great as they were. Yumi shrugged her shoulders hopelessly.

"Alright, alright. I'll stop pushing." Tamiko relented, "You get to work now, and have a good day."

Yumi ducked out under the counter and waved to the twins. They threw their homework in their backpacks and hurriedly zipped them up while Yumi went to fetch her bike from the back of the bakery. They met her at the front of the store and Yumi changed the sign from "closed" to "open" like she did most mornings.

Then Yumi began her morning task of escorting the twins to school. Neither Tamiko nor her husband wanted the twins walking alone to school, but were too busy to take them themselves. Yumi walked the twins to school to take one less worry off Tamiko and her husband's mind. It was early for the twins to be going to school, but when it had become clear that this was the only time the twins could be escorted to school they had been ordered to go out for a club with morning sessions.

They had gone out for drama, which fit them well. Yumi wouldn't be surprised if they would soon be moved out of the "kiddy" drama section and into the older section. If they managed to act like less goof-balls, Yumi guessed they would be moved by next year. The only question was only how the twins acted in class.

Sora and Emi were rascals but they were the good sort. Yumi had dealt with worse kids at the group home, so perhaps she wasn't the best judge of what was "good" and what was "bad" behavior. Still, the twins' hearts were usually in the right place. Yumi walked alongside the twins, pushing the bike Tamiko had given her for deliveries over the summer and also personal use.

Out of the two of them, Sora was the talkative one. Emi was more quiet, and tended to follow Sora's lead. Emi, however, was not to be underestimated. She was not just an accessory to her twin's plots but a willing participant who added to the mischief in her own way. Sora was impulsive, but Emi could plan things out. Combined they were the cause of several of Tamiko's grey hairs.

"Did you get your homework done?" Yumi asked cheekily winning a blush of shame from the twins.

"We managed to finish it," Sora said defensively.

Yumi arched an eyebrow skeptically.

"We did," Emi put in, defending herself and her twin.

Sora lied easily, frequently, and often for no reason, but Emi could usually be trusted to be tell the truth. So Yumi let the matter rest.

"If you need any help with your homework-" she began to offer.

Sora grinned, "Good, because we have a project coming up, and you're really good at history."

Yumi shook her head, feeling a little duped, though she didn't mind helping the twins, "Alright, when you get your project, let me know and I'll see what I can do."

Yumi waved the twins off when they reached their school. Once she saw them walk through the main entrance, she got on her bike and began to race off.

* * *

Yumi's day went on the same as most days, until lunch that is. She had been making her way outside, where she usually had lunch on clear days, when she heard someone yelling: Yu-chan, Yu-chan!

She vaguely recognized the voice, but she had no idea who "Yu-chan" was. It was only when the footsteps got closer and closer to her, that Yumi turned around. Mitsukuni was running towards her, only a few feet away from her, with Takashi keeping up with easy, long strides.

"Haniozuka-senpai?" She asked, confused.

(She had learned from a girl in class who had been talking about the host club that Mitsukuni was a third year, a fact that Yumi was still trying to wrap her head around.)

"Hani," Mitsukuni corrected, "And, yes, silly! Didn't you hear me yelling for you?" He asked scoldingly, though his cuteness undersold it.

Yumi pointed to herself, "Me?"

"Yes, you! Yu-chan!"

Yumi raised an eyebrow. She was Mitsukuni's junior so the honorific made sense, though she hardly considered herself on good enough terms with Mitsukuni for cutesy a nickname. Still, Yumi didn't really have the heart to tell him not to call her by that name.

"Oh er, I didn't recognize that as my name." She told him bluntly. It wasn't exactly what she wanted to say but Yumi tended to be direct when she was feeling awkward.

"Did you need something?" She asked, confused what two third years that she had only met briefly the day before would want with her.

Mitsukuni was staring at her very oddly, and Yumi shifted uncomfortably under his gaze.

"Uh..." she rubbed her sleeve against her cheek. "Is there something on my face?" She asked, remembering the flour Tamiko had thrown at her in the morning.

"You're my height!" Mitsukuni blurted, startling Yumi.

She stared at him confused, "You're just noticing...?"

Mitsukuni nodded at her. He was staring at her like she was some sort of strange, beautiful wonder. The way he stared at her made her stomach flip-flop in a way she pointedly ignored. He was just starting at her, there was no reason to get worked up about it. She had stared when she had noticed his heigh after all.

"I'm guessing that's not the reason why you were looking for me?" Yumi prompted when Mitsukuni's staring continued.

The short blonde blinked twice before seeming to remember why he had been looking for her. Yumi repressed a laugh. "We wanted to invite you to the Host Club! In fact, we were wondering if you could come a little bit before opening time."

Yumi shook her head immediately, "Sorry, even if I had money for that, I work during club hours." Yumi refrained from mentioning that the Host club wasn't her cup of tea, as Mitsukuni would no doubt take that as a challenge.

Mitsukuni seemed to panic a bit, not expecting Yumi to say no, "Then just before club then!"

Yumi arched an eyebrow, "Why?"

Mitsukuni and Takashi exchanged a look that made Yumi feel frustratingly confused.

"We need to talk to you about something." Mitsukuni said vaguely.

Irritation sparked at Mitsukuni's evasive half-answers. If they wanted something from her, Yumi couldn't understand why they just didn't come out and say it straight.

"Then talk to me about it now. I can't be late to work." She told them sternly.

Mitsukuni seemed to writhe in discomfort at her words again. Yumi was distinctly aware that she was not giving him the answers he wanted or acting the way he expected. Perhaps she should have cared, but Yumi was getting very frustrated with these rich kids not understanding that some people had _actual_ responsibilities.

"But, but!" Mitsukuni stumbled. He widened his brown eyes and they began to water.

Yumi paled and quickly ducked her head in a small bow that was polite, dismissive, and kept her from falling prey to his tricks, "I'm sorry, Haniozuka-senpai. Morinozuka-senpai." She apologized, "I have to eat before lunch is over." And with that she spun on her heel and darted toward her favorite tree to eat in.

Besides that strange encounter nothing else happened that was out of the ordinary to Yumi for the rest of the day. But, for the second time, Yumi was unaware of the chaos she was causing within the Host Club.

* * *

last edited: 10/21/15

Please review and favorite!~


	3. Rabbit Hunt

**Full Summary:** Some girls grow tired watching their sibling on the banks of a river. However, some girls are too busy working to merely grow tired watching. When Yumi Taka was accepted to Ouran Academy, she thought she had found her jar of Orange Marmalade. However, when she discovers Haruhi's "little secret", her whole life goes awry. After a chase bullying incident, she finds her jar of marmalade to be frightfully empty. Not wanting to drop the jar, she descends into the adventures of the Host Club and Wonderland. Can they help her find her way home? Will she even want to go home afterwards? Most importantly, can they help her find herself? And just maybe, on the way back, she can fill her jar with just a little bit of Honey.

* * *

 **Arc One: The Reluctant Alice and the Host Club**

 **Chapter Three:** **Rabbit Hunt**

The Host Club was in a flutter over what to do since Mitsukuni's plan had failed. After all, everyday that the Host Club waited to extract a promise of secrecy from Yumi was another day where Haruhi's secret could be revealed. They had yet to tell Haruhi of what had happened. In fact, it hadn't even crossed their mind _to_ tell Haruhi.

"We cannot risk my precious daughter!" Tamaki had decided at their secret, emergency meeting they were holding during lunch hours.

He implored the twins to bring Yumi to Music Room 3 where they would all, Haruhi excluded, confront Yumi about the secret she unwittingly carried. Kyoya had been surprisingly silent on the whole affair which made everyone a little uneasy. Mitsukuni felt a little worried on Yumi's behalf. She hadn't done anything knowingly to get on the bad side of the Host Club. Despite the way she had rebuffed him the day before, Yumi seemed a reasonable sort of girl. There was probably a smarter way to go about it, but with Tamaki in charge, it was unlikely to happen.

So the twins were dispatched and they returned after a few minutes half-carrying, half-dragging Yumi. The second year had not come willingly, and that was made abundantly clear by Yumi's loud protests and angrily, swinging legs, which would have been indecent if not for her dress pants. Knowing the twins, they had plucked her up from wherever they had found her and dragged her off without so much as a "by your leave", the Host Club didn't hold Yumi's resistant against her. The half-closed lunchbox clutched in her hand seemed confirmation enough of the twins' less then gentlemen-like behavior towards Yumi.

The twins dragged Yumi across the music room and dumped her in a chair that put the Host Club between Yumi and the exit, in case she made a run from it. The way Yumi half-stood up from her seat the moment the twins released her made this an entirely probable possibility.

"Yu-chan!" Mitsukuni exclaimed, throwing his arms around Yumi's shoulders.

The girl shot him an unamused look as she was knocked down into her seat. Though Mitsukuni was happy to see Yumi, it was a strategic decision. If she tried to run, it would just make everything more complicated. He had her sitting down fully now, and she didn't try to rise again.

"Ah, Yumi-san! Thank you for gracing us with your presence!" Tamaki exclaimed prancing over to her. Yumi tightened her grip on her lunch box with both hands, spoiling any of Tamaki's plans to hold her hand in his dramatics.

"I was dragged, I didn't choose to grace you with anything. And I don't recall giving you permission to call me by my first name," she told him dryly, looking up at him with a humorless expression.

"Kuudere," the twins mumbled under their breath.

Kyoya walked over, notebook in hand, as Mitsukuni let her go, sensing the mood shift.

"You're very hard to get a hold of, Taka-san." Kyoya said, as if that explained their kidnapping. Internally Mitsukuni face palmed. He didn't know Yumi well, but he doubted that was the way to get on her good side.

"Perhaps if you weren't so particular about how this went down, I wouldn't be." Yumi snapped back, confirming Mitsukuni's suspicion.

It was really rather impressive, Mitsukuni thought, either she was a very good actress or was completely unintimidated by Kyoya. It wasn't clear which was true.

"The trouble is, Taka-san, that you hold some sensitive information."

Yumi arched a dark eyebrow, "I'm sorry, what?" She asked after a moment, confusion overriding her indignation.

"Fujioka Haruhi, is currently working off a debt to the Host Club by working as a host - under the guise of a male. Only the Host Club and - apparently - _you_ are aware that she is a female. Obviously, if her actual gender were to become common knowledge she would be unable to stay on as a host and would be limited in her ability to pay off her debt.

In exchange for your silence on the matter," Kyoya continued, producing an envelope from his pocket, "We are prepared to offer you a ticket to our upcoming dance."

Yumi shot Mitsukuni a look that made him step back. She had, correctly, identified him as the one who informed Kyoya, and so the rest of the Host Club, that she didn't have the money to attend the Host Club or any of its events. To everyone's surprise, the offer that they expected her to leap at, she seemed less than pleased with - to put it mildly. For a girl that who was only taller than _one_ of the Hosts, she sure was intimidating.

Yumi raised one hand, cutting off anything Tamaki or Kyoya were about to say as they realized their plan was about to fall apart spectacularly. A cold aura seemed to settle over the girl, making her seem taller than she was.

"I don't have any want or desire for your bribery or your charity," Yumi said coolly as she slowly got to her feet. Mitsukuni was shocked that Yumi could make the act of _standing up_ seem intimidating.

Everyone shifted uncomfortably. They didn't want Yumi to leave without agreeing to keep Haruhi's secret, but they were intimidated by the aura that was radiating from the girl.

"I get it." Yumi said after a few moments of tense silence. "You're worried that I'll let this information out, accidentally or on purpose. Well, I _haven't_ told anyone." the sarcastic 'for your information' was said implicitly in Yumi's tone, "I didn't know that Fujioka-san was even in this club until yesterday. So I haven't had time to go blabbing it around. And for the record, despite my confusion about the matter, I had no intention of getting myself involved." She told them, surprising everyone.

"You didn't need to kidnap me," Yumi continued, sounding irritated and Mitsukuni detected some amount of hurt, which surprised and confused him, "and I don't need any incentives. It's not any of my business if Fujioka-san crossdresses or not, never mind to blab about. If you don't believe me, then believe that I don't have anyone _to_ tell and even if I did - which I don't - it would be my word against yours, and my word isn't worth much." Yumi paused for breath, and a strange silence came over the room, as no one was entirely sure what to say after that.

Yumi was again the one to break the silence, "Now, I believe that covers all my bases." She said signifying the "meeting" was at an end, "If you'll excuse me, I have lunch to finish."

And with that, Yumi walked forward, the Host Club parting before her, and she exited the room without glancing over her shoulder once or faltering in her step. It was rather impressive. Many families tried to teach their children how to hold that sort of grace and poise under pressure, and it didn't always succeed. Yumi, a commoner, had it down flat.

No one tried to stop her. They were all a little stunned with the matter-of-fact way she had alleviated their concerns and at the same time chastised them. When Mitsukuni would later think about the event he would find it amusing how she sounded like a lecturing mother. In the moment, however, Mitsukuni didn't see any humor.

The Host Club expected Yumi to take their bribery and go. Some of the more cynical members of the Host Club had expected her to try to bargain her way up to a better bribe. What no one had expected was for Yumi to toss their bribery in their face, call it "charity", and then agree to keep the secret without any payment whatsoever. It was something that just didn't happen. They all stood in stunned silence.

"She didn't take the bribe..." the twins finally said, as if any of the hosts had missed it.

Mitsukuni found himself wondering what it meant that Yumi didn't take the bribe. He wondered what that meant about Yumi's character and what that meant for the club. His eyes slid over to Kyoya, who seemed to be paused in time as his mind quickly put together some sort of plan. Mitsukuni could imagine the spinning gears of Kyoya's mind fast at work. From what Mitsukuni knew of Kyoya's values this wouldn't be the last of their dealings with Taka Yumi. Kyoya would consider this an unpaid debt, which would never be something that was allowed to stand, whether it was owed or due.

It was strange that Kyoya's plan had failed. Though Kyoya hadn't divulged any personal information about Yumi, but Mitsukuni knew that Kyoya knew more than he had told them. Kyoya wouldn't have approved this plan if he didn't think it would succeed. So, that left Mitsukuni with a question: who exactly was Taka Yumi that she could throw Kyoya for a loop?

Mitsukuni tugged on Kyoya's sleeve to get his attention and seized on one thing about Yumi's speech that had bothered him the most, "What did Yu-chan mean, that she doesn't have anyone to tell?" It was a strange thing that it was that, above all else, that sat uncomfortably in his stomach.

Kyoya cleared his throat. Mitsukuni could see the subtle changes in his posture that indicated that Kyoya felt like he was back in control. Yumi had surprised them all, but this was a question Kyoya could answer. "Taka-san does not appear to have many friends at Ouran."

"That's just a nice way of saying," Hikaru cut in.

"That she doesn't have _any_ friends." Kaoru picked up.

"Makes sense," they both said together, "Who'd want to be friends with her?"

Kyoya didn't respond to the twin's commentary, but Mitsukuni felt his heart pang. Sure, Yumi stood out as different, but so did all of them. There wasn't anything about her that made Mitsukuni _not_ want to be friends with her though.

"On top of that," Kyoya continued, "Taka-san is originally from Karuizawa. She moved here recently, just over this last season. So its unlikely that she has many friends outside of school."

"That sounds so lonely..." Mitsukuni whimpered, thinking about how Yumi was probably eating lunch alone at that very moment. Takashi put his hand comfortingly on Mitsukuni's head.

The twins didn't have a snarky comment for that. A short silence fell over the group before Tamaki broke it.

"That is unacceptable!" He exclaimed, banging his fist against his open palm.

"What is boss?" The twins chorused, confused by the sudden change.

"No beautiful lady should be alone and friendless! We must do something about this!"

"I thought we had a 'no friends with clients' rule or something," Hikaru pointed out.

Tamaki shook his head defiantly, "Yumi-san is not a client!"

"It's true," Mitsukuni jumped in, happy with the way this was going. Although he wasn't sure where exactly it was going, Tamaki's mind was unpredictable, "She's never visited before."

"See!" Tamaki cheered, "Yumi, being the pure hearted young maiden that she is, has promised to keep our secret without any gift to win her good favor! She guards Haruhi and her secret, the same as us."

"Actually boss," Hikaru interrupted.

"She guards Haruhi's secret better," Kaoru pointed out.

"Since she doesn't have any incentive, like us."

Tamaki looked stricken at the suggestion that his, and whole club's, intentions were less than pure. Although it was a fair point. The Host Club wanted Haruhi to stay in the club, which couldn't happen if everyone knew she was a girl. Yumi, on the other hand, had no stake whether Haruhi was in the club or not. She had no reason to keep Haruhi's secret but had agreed to anyway.

"Truly then she is a pure hearted young woman!" Tamaki recovered with gusto. "We should help her make friends here at Ouran!"

"How, Tama-chan?" Mitsukuni asked. It was a nice thought, but Mitsukuni wasn't sure how they would go about it.

"It's not like we can force people to like her," the twins put in.

The twins in particular didn't know what to make of Yumi. She was different, more different than even the blunt and strange Haruhi. Taka Yumi lacked Haruhi's natural charm and her beauty. Haruhi had been a wreck when she had come to the club, but she was cute when she cleaned up. Yumi, even cleaned up, wasn't that cute. Her reactions were interesting, however. She had the twins interest if not their approval.

Before Tamaki could make any suggestions the lunch bell rang.

"Alright everyone!" Tamaki dismissed the Host Club, "We'll reconvene before club hours to discuss what we should do about Yumi-hime!"

* * *

Of course, when they reconvened, Haruhi was there, which meant they had to explain to Haruhi who Taka Yumi was, and what had happened.

"You tried to bribe her?" Haruhi exclaimed, incredulous, "Why would you do something stupid like that?!"

Kyoya adjusted his glasses, "You are working to learn how to waltz, to prove that you are fit to be a host. All your work would be for naught if Taka-san exposed your secret."

"You should have just asked her instead of- wait, you shouldn't have done anything! It's my problem to deal with!"

"It has to do with your ability to pay back your debt," Kyoya pointed out, "So, as your employer, it is our business, Haruhi."

Haruhi pursed her lips, unable to argue with Kyoya's logic though she still disagreed.

"You insulted her by trying to bribe her," she pointed out instead, switching to something she could critique them about.

The club shifted around feeling guilty, except for Kyoya who still held that there was nothing wrong with a "quid pro quo" relationship.

"So, despite how rudely you behaved, she agreed to keep silent. I should thank her..." Haruhi mused aloud.

Tamaki used this to jump in. "That's what we were thinking, Haruhi! Especially considering that she's so lonely-"

"Lonely?" Haruhi asked.

Mitsukuni jumped in this time. He hadn't been able to get Kyoya's words out of his head. It was so sad to think of Yumi eating lunch all alone everyday, "Yeah! Yu-chan doesn't have any friends here at Ouran, and all of her friends live in another town."

Haruhi looked thoughtful about this, but if she thought anything of it, she didn't say.

"I'll talk to her tomorrow," she said eventually, "To thank her, and apologize for your behavior," she gave them a disapproving frown.

Haruhi didn't know it, but a few members of the Host Club made similar decisions to visit Yumi.

* * *

A/N: Reviews motivate the author!~

last edited: 11/06/15


	4. Weed in the Flower Garden

**Full Summary:** Some girls grow tired watching their sibling on the banks of a river. However, some girls are too busy working to merely grow tired watching. When Yumi Taka was accepted to Ouran Academy, she thought she had found her jar of Orange Marmalade. However, when she discovers Haruhi's "little secret", her whole life goes awry. After a chase bullying incident, she finds her jar of marmalade to be frightfully empty. Not wanting to drop the jar, she descends into the adventures of the Host Club and Wonderland. Can they help her find her way home? Will she even want to go home afterwards? Most importantly, can they help her find herself? And just maybe, on the way back, she can fill her jar with just a little bit of Honey.

* * *

 **Arc One: The Reluctant Alice and the Host Club**

 **Chapter Four:** **Weed in the Flower Garden**

The next day, Yumi had put the Host Club out of her thoughts. It had been a weird few encounters, and she had been insulted by their bribe, but Yumi didn't hold onto anger and wasn't one to dwell on anything for long. She had half-forgiven them in her mind without any apology. Yumi doubted they even thought about what she would think of their offer. They were rich so they thought that money could solve all their problems. She had been mad at the time, but it was too exhausting to be mad all the time. Yumi had enough actual work to tire her out without resorting to petty grudges.

To be honest, Yumi couldn't say that their bribery attempted had been ill founded or even unwise, however insulted she felt. Most of the girls from the group home would have jumped at the invitation. They wouldn't have even considered it a bribe. They wouldn't have thought about saying no either. Yumi could admit that she was a bit of a special case. There wasn't anything that wrong with taking the invitation. Yumi had just spent too much time worrying about her reputation and trying to build it up that she took the offer as a slight it wasn't meant to be.

The Host Club had not been subjected to Yumi's slavish attempts to earn a good reputation. There was no reason for them to think any differently of her then the people of Karuizawa had before Yumi had undertaken the challenge of changing their minds. It was exhausting to think that, in terms of her reputation, Yumi was back, almost exactly, to where she had started from. Intellectually, she knew all her previous effort in Karuizawa weren't a waste, but at the moment it felt like it was.

Either way, Yumi had mostly forgiven the Host Club and had put the event mostly out of her mind. So she was more than a little surprised when a brown haired boy appeared in front of her during lunch. Yumi ate by herself, outside, under a sakura tree when the weather let her. People usually left her alone. Nobody came to make friends with her, but nobody came to bother her either. It was an unspoken mutual agreement between Yumi and the rest of the school. They would each keep to themselves.

"Are you Taka Yumi?" The boy asked.

Yumi nodded her head. She watched the boy carefully trying to judge what his intentions were. He didn't seem hostile, in fact, he seemed the opposite.

"I'm Fujioka Haruhi."

Yumi stared as the boy in front of her suddenly became a girl (from her perspective). For a second she thought "this is the girl who stole my scholarship" then the thought faded. The scholarship wasn't hers and she knew it. It belonged to whoever could win it. Besides, the way everything turned out was for the best. Instead of just Yumi being able to go, they both got to, even if Yumi had to get up early every day and work late every day. Yumi was used to the work. Yumi quickly pulled her thoughts away from the amount of hours she was plugging in everyday, in case it made her resentful against Haruhi, who didn't deserve it.

"I just wanted to thank you, personally, for keeping my secret. Even though we don't know each other."

Yumi shrugged her shoulders, "Just because I don't know you doesn't mean I want to make things difficult for you."

Haruhi grinned at her response. "And I wanted to apologize for all the trouble the Host Club caused you," Haruhi added with an exasperated look.

Yumi's lips quirked up at Haruhi's expression, "They must be a handful to deal with on a daily level."

Haruhi nodded her head, "They are."

Yumi tilted her head with curiosity, "How exactly did you wind up crossdressing as a guy with a debt to the Host Club?"

Haruhi sighed, as if just the memory of the event were painful and annoying. Yumi should have felt bad for asking given Haruhi's reaction, but she wasn't. A small part of her was even happy to have her feel that way - though Yumi tried to squash that part of her, embarrassed at how petty she was behaving even if it was only internally.

Haruhi began to recount her tale and almost immediately Yumi began to laugh. She received an unamused looked from Haruhi.

"Sorry, sorry," she waved apologetically, "But you cut your hair off because of gum?" She asked. Yumi's bangs were almost in her eyes because she needed a haircut but was too broke to pay for a nice one and too vain to risk a poor one.

"You know peanut butter works to get that out right?" Yumi informed Haruhi, barely hiding a smile.

Haruhi tilted her head as she thought about it, then shook her head, "I didn't..." she admitted sheepishly, "But I guess I do now."

"Yup, there you go," Yumi said, laughing softly, "But continue."

Haruhi continued on with her story and Yumi felt herself feeling oddly jealous of Haruhi. The girl didn't seem particularly invested in the events that happened to her. She hadn't been seeking friends or anything exciting. It all had just _happened_ to her. Yet, Yumi wanted friends and seemed unable to get them. A question festered inside of Yumi: what was so likable about Haruhi that wasn't about her?

Yumi slammed on the breaks as she processed that thought. Haruhi _was_ likable. As they sat talking, Yumi found herself liking Haruhi more and more. Without Yumi having to ask, Haruhi had sat down and had joined her for lunch. Honestly, Yumi could see why the host club liked Haruhi. She liked Haruhi as well, despite her feelings of jealousy.

"How are you doing, Yumi?" Haruhi asked, switching the topic of discussion from her to Yumi.

Yumi floundered at the question, "Me?" She asked, surprised and confused.

"Yeah, I couldn't help but notice that you're sitting here all alone."

Yumi shrugged, "I'm not used to making new friends." She said evasively.

"Right, you moved here recently. Is it very different from Tokyo?"

Yumi nodded and smiled as she thought about Karuizawa, "Vastly."

"Do you miss home?"

Yumi shrugged, "Karuizawa wasn't home..." Haruhi gave her a curious look but Yumi wasn't sure how to tell her that when you were a group home kid, no place was _really_ home.

"I miss my friends," Yumi admitted, "A lot..." she admitted more sheepishly, "But this is an amazing opportunity for me. I'm lucky to be here."

Haruhi nodded. That was their shared experience. Neither one of them belonged there, but they had both, in their own ways, earned it. No matter how resentful Yumi felt towards Haruhi she just couldn't dislike her, not just because of her personality but because of their similar situation. They were the only two people in the school who had earned their right to be there.

The two girls talked about nothing important for the rest of lunch before they parted ways. Yumi was surprised by how much she and Haruhi got on. Though Yumi had a hard time not being jealous, it didn't seem to outwardly manifest. They talked and had a good time. Haruhi wasn't anything like the kids from back home. She was too _nice_ , too polished. Yet, she didn't have the plastic feel that a lot of the other Ouran girls had. Haruhi didn't have the rough feel of the group home kids, but was something in between the rough and the fake that made her feel real, normal, natural. It felt nice to be around someone normal. (Later, Yumi learned that Haruhi was a "natural type" which made her laugh loud and long enough to get weird looks)

* * *

It was almost funny to Yumi that not long after hearing about Haruhi's own brush with a bully, Yumi was facing down three of her own (and of course it would be three). They were all second years, but only one of them was from Yumi's class. The other two Yumi recognized from A class.

"Why were you eating lunch with Haruhi-kun?" The obvious leader demanded.

Yumi rolled her eyes. It probably wasn't the correct reaction, since the girls seemed to get more riled up by the gesture. Yumi imagined them as cats with their fur raised, which made it hard not to laugh (and that would _definitely_ not be the correct reaction).

"We both competed for the scholarship together. We were just talking about that. Not that it's any of _your_ business." She informed them, her tone dry.

The girls flushed and Yumi could see them visibly deflate.

"Listen," their leader blustered, trying to regain her power in the exchange, "If you want to visit Haruhi at the host club, that's fine. But there are rules, commoner, and you better start playing by them." She jerked her finger, moving to poke Yumi in the chest but stopping an inch away from her blouse.

Yumi arched an eyebrow, "Or what?" She asked with passive curiosity.

The girls looked between each other, "What?" they finally asked.

"I said," Yumi repeated slower as if they were simple, " _Or what_?"

Now the tables had turned and Yumi had them on the defensive, "If you're going to threaten me, you have something to back it up with. That's just threatening 101." She pointed out, "If I don't listen to you, what will you do? Ostracize me? Well, you've already done that. So, I'm just curious. What do you plan to do to me?"

Yumi watched smugly as the girls stuttered and stumbled. They saw, same as Yumi, what was happening. Even though it was three on one, Yumi was wheedling all their power away. She had also called them out on something they couldn't defend. None of the girls knew what to threaten her with. Clearly they hadn't planned their confrontation out. They had expected her to be immediately cowed. That had been their first mistake.

Yumi could tell just by looking at them that they weren't going to act like the type of bullies she was used to. They weren't going to grab her by the hair and try to throw her down the stairs. Yumi would honestly be impressed if they had the gall to knock her _books_ out her hands. Their biggest threat was exactly what she had named, ostracizing her, and unfortunately for them, they had already done that.

The other 2-A girl stepped forward, taking over as their leader faltered. She was a tall girl who towered over the considerably shorter Yumi. On pure instinct Yumi stepped back, though the moment she did she felt the power begin to shift away from her.

"Listen, little dandelion," the taller girl sneered, "You're nothing but a _weed_. We tolerate your existence, your presence, because you've been staying where you belong, on the sidelines. If you try to get into the flower bed... well, there are ways of _weeding out_ your kind." The threat hung in the air for a moment as the two girls glared each other down.

It was an actual threat, but a vague one. Yumi wanted to fire back but their snickering stilled her tongue. As they walked off, laughing amongst themselves, laughing at her, Yumi felt her blood boil. A year ago, Yumi would have punched those little princesses in the gut. A year ago, she might have chased them down and then knocked them down. However, this wasn't public school. This wasn't Karuizawa. Yumi wasn't going to lose her place and her job at the school over a few mean words. Plus, she might have a negative reputation at Ouran, but it was nothing like her reputation back in Karuizawa. This was a big step up for her, and Yumi didn't want to lose it because she couldn't keep her temper in check.

It was funny, but Yumi would have preferred it if they _had_ slapped her. Their words burned under her skin worse than bruise would have. She wondered if that was really what they all thought of her or something they had just said to hurt her. She didn't know which one would bother her worse.

Yumi scuffed her shoe against the ground. The metaphor was fitting, she admitted. She didn't belong in this place. Haruhi fit in better than she did. Yumi wasn't like them. She wasn't some lily-skinned princess. Her skin was darkened from running wild out in the sun in Karuizawa. She hadn't ever given a thought to her complexion, tan and covered in freckles down to her fingertips. Now that she was at Ouran though, she realized how much she stood out. To everyone, Yumi supposed, she might look like a weed in their perfect garden. She sort of felt like one.

The bell rang, signifying that she was late to class. Yumi headed to class, not rushing even though she was late.

* * *

Please review! They are really motivating!

last edited: 10/10/15


	5. Drink Me

**Full Summary:** Some girls grow tired watching their sibling on the banks of a river. However, some girls are too busy working to merely grow tired watching. When Yumi Taka was accepted to Ouran Academy, she thought she had found her jar of Orange Marmalade. However, when she discovers Haruhi's "little secret", her whole life goes awry. After a chase bullying incident, she finds her jar of marmalade to be frightfully empty. Not wanting to drop the jar, she descends into the adventures of the Host Club and Wonderland. Can they help her find her way home? Will she even want to go home afterwards? Most importantly, can they help her find herself? And just maybe, on the way back, she can fill her jar with just a little bit of Honey.

 **Drink Me**

 **Chapter Five**

* * *

As soon as Yumi's shift in the gardens was over, she was peddling home. Usually, it took a bit of time to get from Ouran back to town, but since Yumi's mind was still out of sorts since her argument with that gaggle of girls she was peddling much faster than she usually did. Yumi was trying to push the unpleasant conversation out of her head with sheer physical effort and though she was largely unsuccessful, she was making record time. Her fierce peddling had a side effect. By the time she reached town she had tired herself out.

Desperate for water, Yumi pulled to a stop outside a convenience store that she passed every day on the way to school. She had never stopped here before but her need for water couldn't wait until she managed to bike back to the bakery. Lining the outside wall that faced the street were various vending machines. Nimbly, Yumi jumped off her bike just in front of the vending machines. She leaned her bike against a bike rack behind her, not bothering to lock it up since it wasn't leaving her sight. The price of the bottle, 200 yen, made Yumi pause. She debated internally with herself over the price. Yumi didn't have a lot of spare money on her and every little bit counted. On the other hand, she was thirsty and the bakery was still a while off. With a sigh of defeat, she put the money in and hit the button for water not bothering with the flavored water that costed slightly extra.

She gulped down the water and scanned the other vending machines absentmindedly. The one right next to hers caught her eye instantly. It sold cigarettes. In Karuizawa Yumi had smoked. Most of the group home kids smoked even though none of them were of legal age. It hadn't been hard to get cigarettes in Karuizawa and something in the back of Yumi's mind whispered that it was probably a lot easier to get cigarettes in Tokyo.

Even back in Karuizawa Yumi had never been one of the kids who had gotten hooked on cigarettes. She smoked socially and usually even then only when she was under a lot of stress. Since moving away from Karuizawa, Yumi had cleaned up her act. She didn't smoke nearly as much. Part at that had been because of Tamiko who had put her foot down about smoking in the bakery before Yumi had even attempted it. Yumi was sure Suzuki had given her granddaughter a head's up when Yumi had moved in with Tamiko about her habit.

To Yumi's credit, she had started to kick the habit on her own. Tamiko hadn't pressured her one way or another about smoking, just about _where_ she did it. She had correctly realized that Yumi, at that point, would have smoked more just because she had been asked not to. Yumi, guiltily, thought that she wasn't so sure that she wouldn't have smoked _now_ if Tamiko told her she shouldn't.

No, Yumi had decided on her own that she was going to stop. She was aware that she had picked up a lot of bad habits at the group home. It was a slow and hard process to change her ways, so Yumi had picked the one that was the easiest to deal with and the most damaging. She knew that she was never going to fit in at Ouran if she acted like she did back in Karuizawa. For the most part, Yumi had succeeded in her mission. Since she had moved to Tokyo she hadn't bought a single pack. Though she had smoked through her stash that she had brought with her.

Once the temptation of her stash had been removed, Yumi hadn't felt any itching to smoke. Yet now, out of the blue, all Yumi wanted to do was throw what little spending she had into the machine and smoke. The I.D. swipe was all that stopped Yumi, and that was only because she didn't know how to cheat it. For a few moments her mind spun as she tried to think of a way of cheating it. Nothing came to mind. With a last vicious swig, Yumi downed what was left of her water and threw it with a little too much force into the trashcan. Then she peddled off towards home, feeling worse than she had before she had stopped.

Yumi arrived at the bakery in a funk. Nothing had seemed to have gone right today - the lunch with Haruhi forgotten in her distress - and she felt terrible for reasons she couldn't put her finger on. The bakery was bustling with business like it always was at this hour. Yumi stared through the glass door but even after she had locked up her bike behind the bakery she couldn't will herself to go inside.

That wasn't a particularly new event. There was something about the bustling, homey atmosphere of the bakery that kept Yumi away during it's busy hours. She tried to tell herself that there were too many people, but deep down Yumi knew that wasn't the real cause. Though she refused to acknowledge what the problem really was.

Instead of going into the bakery, Yumi often headed over to the Himura house. Today was no different. Usually Yumi paid no mind to her avoidance of the bakery. She was more helpful over at the Himura house babysitting the twins. Today, however, Yumi didn't feel like she was helping out the Himuras. She felt like she was taking a walk of shame.

Yumi headed to the Himura house which was right behind the bakery. It was a marvel of luck that the Himuras had managed to buy a property for their store that was so close to their house. Yumi hopped the chain fence easily. There was a little gate but Yumi didn't have to key to it. Often she was greeted by the Himura's pet dog, Kaito, but today he was inside. There was another uncomfortable feeling in Yumi's gut that she pushed away.

Both Tamiko and her husband, Hibiki, were working in the bakery. The twins were both home by now, as they would have even if they were old enough for afternoon classes. The twins were home alone then, with one of their parents pulling away to check on them every half an hour or so. If Yumi hadn't gone over to their house, the twins would have been at her door in fifteen minutes or less. Since the twins had made Yumi their playmate, weren't as keen to playing on their own.

Yumi knocked on the back door with the back of her hand. As soon as she knocked Kaito started yapping and the twins' heavy footfalls could be heard racing for the door. The door was flung open and two grinning faces met hers.

"Yumi!" "Onee-san!" The twins greeted.

Kaito lunged at Yumi, his small fur paws on her work overalls as he panted his hellos. Yumi rubbed his head with one hand and slung her arm around Emi. Sora was practically vibrating with excitement. Internally, Yumi rolled her eyes. She visited after school often yet the twins always acted as if this were a rare occurrence.

"Hey trouble-makers," Yumi greeted teasingly, pushing Kaito down. She wasn't supposed to pet him when he was climbing all over her, but Yumi usually forgot that rule.

Sora stuck out her tongue at Yumi in response, but was still grinning.

"Have you started your homework yet?" Yumi asked as she walked into the house, having disentangled herself from Kaito and Emi.

"What sort of homework do you have?" Yumi asked.

"Math, penmanship," Sora began.

"reading, science," Emi continued.

"and our history project," they finished together, reminding Yumi of the twins she had met the day before.

Yumi clicked her tongue. It seemed like a lot of work for just grade one. It was much more than she had when she was their age. Although, Yumi's school hadn't been the best public school in the world.

"What about you, onee-san?" Sora asked, pulling Yumi's thoughts back to the present before she get herself lost in her childhood.

Yumi shrugged her shoulders. "About the same," she told them. She had a lot more than the girls, of course, but Yumi didn't want the girls to feel like they were bother.

The twins told Yumi about their day as they walked up the stairs to their bedroom. Yumi listened attentively as they reached the twins' room. Once inside, Yumi grabbed Sora's comforter and laid it down on the floor. The three girls spread out on the comforter and pulled out their homework.

Yumi worked on her own homework while the twins worked on their own. Occasionally Yumi turned her attention back to the twins to help them when they struggled. Emi knew what she was doing for the most part, though she struggled with her penmanship. Sora's penmanship was beautiful, but she struggled with everything else.

Yumi's own homework was challenging but unless she wanted to drop to C class or lower she had to do it all and perfectly. While Yumi didn't exactly care that much about whether she was dropped to C or even D she really didn't want to see the smug look on her schoolmates face as she was placed "where she belonged". So, on top of slaving away at her day job, Yumi slaved away at home over her homework. She had to do all the work perfectly and learn it so that she did well on the tests. It was so much work, Yumi was beginning to wonder how much more of this she could take. She wasn't even down with the first semester and she felt like she was about to crack.

Yumi caught the twins concerned gaze when she glanced up from a particularly hard math problem she was working on. She smiled at the twins, trying to relieve the tension that had gathered in the room while she wasn't paying attention.

"Are you okay, Yumi?" Sora asked.

Yumi reached over and ruffled Sora's head. "I'm fine, don't worry about it."

The identical twins shared disbelieving looks that made Yumi feel somewhat insulted. They could at least pretend she had fooled them. By this point the twins had finished their homework and had little else to do but play with their toys and watch Yumi with increasing worry. Though Yumi still had a few hours to go, she didn't want to hang around and show the twins how much work she had. It was boring for them anyway since they had to be quiet.

Yumi said her goodbyes to the twins. They were sad to see her off, mostly because they had wanted to actually _play_ with her and not just do homework. There wasn't anything to be done about that though. Homework came before playing. Tamiko had made it abundantly clear to the twins that when it came to studying they were to leave Yumi alone.

Yumi headed off to the bakery. Kaito, who was outside now, was happy to see Yumi and escorted her to the fence as if it were his personal duty. He was a suspiciously intelligent dog. Yumi hopped the fence and headed in through the back door of the bakery. The rush had ended so the bakery was mostly empty. There were a few couples getting dinner but most of the crowd had bought what they had wanted and taken it home.

Tamiko greeted Yumi with a smile as she walked through the kitchen area, careful to stay out of her and her husband's way.

"Thanks for watching the twins," Tamiko said by way of greeting.

Yumi waved off Tamiko's thanks, "It's no trouble, Tamiko-san. They keep me on task."

Hibiki, Tamiko's husband, laughed, as he came around the corner of one the large shelves with his arms loaded with flour that the Himuras bought wholesale, "I think that's the first time anyone's said that about our girls."

Tamiko turned to lecture Hibiki about something as Yumi watched on with a wistful smile. Watching them tugged at something in Yumi that made her feel uncomfortable. Without a goodbye, Yumi trucked her way upstairs. She told herself that she had work to do and that it was better to start sooner rather than later, but something in that explanation rang a little hollow.

Yumi entered her roomy bedroom. It was a rather large room and with a little renovation could have been a tiny apartment, not that Yumi had the funds to finance something like that. Still, she had a good eye for that sort of thing and she could picture how it would look and where everything would go. Reality always pulled her out of her little day dreams.

She tossed her backpack across the room over to her desk and then followed it, sitting in her chair. She liked it because it was adjustable in height, so that she could arrange it so that her feet could touch the ground - must chairs didn't accommodate for Yumi's small stature. As soon as her butt was in her seat Yumi switched "homework mode" on and quickly lost track of time as she worked. Yumi found that she worked longer and harder when she wasn't checking the clock every few minutes, so she made sure she couldn't even see a clock from where she was sitting.

Yumi was pulled out of her work by a sharp knock on the door. By the time that she got to the door, Tamiko was gone, and there was a simple tray with dinner waiting for her. Yumi picked up the tray and headed to her room. Usually she had dinner with the Himuras but Tamiko seemed to sense that Yumi wouldn't be good company at the moment. Even though Yumi was thankful that she didn't have to turn down dinner with the Himura family or try to grin and bare the experience, she felt strangely upset about the tray. The conflicting feelings settled uncomfortably inside her, and instead of trying to deal with them she just shook them off.

Yumi returned to her desk with the tray and ate absentmindedly while she finished up her homework. By the time she finished dinner most of her homework was done. To give herself a little mental break, she took the tray down to clean up after herself. The bakery was dark as the Himura family had retired for the night. The bakery was closed and the whole place seemed a little gloomy and cold without the warm fires that kept the place toasty warm.

As Yumi washed her dishes, she regretted going straight to her room. Now that it was too late she chided herself for not having dinner with the Himuras. She shouldn't throw away some of her only social interaction (and certainly one of the few _positive_ ones) she got during the day. It wasn't like she could interact with them whenever she wished. They weren't her family. Yumi shoved the dishes away with more force than necessary.

With no other excuse to keep herself off task, Yumi returned to her room to struggle through what was left of her homework. She managed to finish it before midnight, but it left her feeling drained and empty. Yumi half stumbled through her nightly routine operating on pure habit rather than conscious thought. The only thing that Yumi could focus her thoughts on was all the work she was doing on a daily basis and whether or not it was worth it. She couldn't come to any sort of conclusion, only that she was tired and she was sick of being tired all the time. This was supposed to be an amazing opportunity, but Yumi didn't feel amazed. She felt exhausted, lonely, and more than a little bit defeated. It seemed like no matter how much effort she put in, she couldn't pull herself out of the hole she been born into.

As she set her alarm and then fell into her bed, only half managing to get under the covers till she gave up on the attempt, Yumi tried to push her dark and depressing thoughts away. She succeeded for as long as it took her to fall asleep, but as soon as her eyes closed for the final time that night, the thoughts came flooding back without her actively trying to push them away. They followed her into her dreams and her sleep was restless.

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reviews are super motivating!


	6. Honey Toast Butterflies

**Full Summary:** Some girls grow tired watching their sibling on the banks of a river. However, some girls are too busy working to merely grow tired watching. When Yumi Taka was accepted to Ouran Academy, she thought she had found her jar of Orange Marmalade. However, when she discovers Haruhi's "little secret", her whole life goes awry. After a chase bullying incident, she finds her jar of marmalade to be frightfully empty. Not wanting to drop the jar, she descends into the adventures of the Host Club and Wonderland. Can they help her find her way home? Will she even want to go home afterwards? Most importantly, can they help her find herself? And just maybe, on the way back, she can fill her jar with just a little bit of Honey.

A/N: I'd like to give a special shout out to FireRebel for the wonderful review. Just wanted to let you know, you made my day.

 **Honey Toast Butterflies**

 **Chapter Six**

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Yumi awoke just as out of sorts as she had went to bed. It took every ounce of her will not to pick up her alarm clock and send it hurtling into the far wall. She sat up and glared at her reflection in the floor length mirror across the room. Her hair was a mess and her eyes reflected her restless night and resulting exhaustion plainly. Somehow Yumi felt more tired than when she had went to bed.

Relying on sheer will power, Yumi rolled herself out of bed and stumbled into her work clothes. There wasn't much to be done about her hair but to pull it back into the side bun she always wore. It looked a little more like a bird's nest than it usually did but Yumi couldn't summon up enough care to try to fix it. Yumi debated trying to hide her appearance behind makeup. That plan was dashed when she remembered that she had used her up her last supply back in Karuizawa and had never bothered to replace it.

With nothing to do to amend her appearance, Yumi stumbled down the stairs. She hadn't even made it all the way down when Tomiko's voice came hurtling up the stairs like an arrow, "Don't even try to sneak off without breakfast, Yumi!"

Yumi didn't and she ate her breakfast beside the twins who had their homework done completely thanks to Yumi's help yesterday. Emi's nose was buried in a book and Sora had some puzzle book that she was trying to solve. Yumi had a hard time believing Sora had the patience for a puzzle. Tomiko had some sort of order she was working to fill on top of her usual amount of work so there was little talk amongst the Himuras and Yumi. In the silence, Yumi silently stewed in her mixture of emotions. Sora had a hard time pulling Yumi from her thoughts to help her with her puzzle and gave up after a few failed attempts - like Yumi predicted.

The silence continued even as Yumi walked the twins to school. The twins exchanged looks but when Sora tried to say something she was stopped by Emi shaking her head. Yumi barely noticed the twins and entirely missed their exchange as she walked them to school operating more an autopilot than anything else.

As soon as the twins were through the front doors of their school Yumi was peddling to work. She peddled quickly not having learned her lesson from yesturday. Since she was already tired, Yumi managed to tire herself out before she even made it out of town. Yumi didn't blink out of autopilot until she realized she was stopped outside the same convenience store as the day before.

It seemed like a note by note repeat of the day before, only this time, Yumi wasn't alone outside the convenience store. There was another man who didn't seem to be too much older than her. He was buying cigarettes. Yumi didn't realize she was staring with envy until a pack of cigarettes smacked her in the chest. She barely managed to catch them.

"You look like you need them, kid," the man told her.

He introduced himself as Oshiro Yuuto and he refused Yumi's offer of repayment when she pulled out her wallet. The only repayment he asked out of her was her company. In the same spot where Yumi had drunk her water bottle the day before, the two were now sitting, smoking.

"So, what's got you so bent out of shape, kid?"

Even though Yumi had told Yuuto her name, he refused to call her by it.

"Life." Yumi answered back as she took a long drawl from one of her cigarettes. The pack was now buried safely in one of her backpack's many pockets.

Yuuto nodded his head, leaning back on one hand and took a long drag.

"It's a bit early for school isn't it?" He asked, "And it looks like you're heading out of town not into it."

"I go to Ouran Academy." Yumi answered.

Yuuto paused and his eyes raked her up, not inappropriately but appraisingly, "You there on a scholarship?"

Yumi shook her head, "Working agreement." She explained.

Yuuto nodded his head, "That's why you're up so early, eh?"

Yumi nodded.

A silence passed between them. Something burned in Yumi's chest and it wasn't the smoke.

"You didn't say it."

"Say what, kid?"

"What they all say," Yumi fumbled over her words, her lack of sleep was hurting her usual blunt eloquence, "That I'm so lucky."

"You don't look like you're lucky, kid. You look like you're about to drop dead from over-working."

Yumi blushed.

"Yeah sure, you got something that a lot of people don't, but different people got different problems." Yuuto took a long drag from his cigarette. "I dropped out of school to help take care of my mom and my little sister but now I've been laid off." He took another drag, "And you're out on your own, I reckon, at a nice cushy school where all the students there hate your guts."

Yumi stared.

"Different problems, but problems."

"I don't belong there."

"You don't."

Yumi stared.

"But you are there. So, good for you." An unkind smile pulled onto Yuuto's face but it wasn't aimed at Yumi.

Yumi didn't feel comforted by his words. The smokes and the conversation were all making her worse. She felt miserable.

"What am I supposed to do?"

"What we all do: what we have to."

Yumi took another drag. His words didn't make her feel any better. A tight knot had tied itself in her chest and Yumi felt like she couldn't breath.

Yuuto left not long after that and Yumi didn't watch him go. She had hoped for some relief, but as much as she felt that "she needed this" and that she had "earned this". It didn't feel like a victory. She threw was was left of the cigarette on the curb and stomped it with her heel. If she didn't hurry she would be late.

As Yumi put the store further and further behind her she felt worse and worse. She hadn't smoked since moving from Karuizawa, but this time it had been different. When she smoked the cigarettes from Karuizawa it hadn't been about actually smoking. They were goodbyes to her friends, reliving old memories from Karuizawa. What she had just done was a defeated smoke. Her grip on the handles her bike tightened; the sun was out and shining bright but Yumi wished it would storm; and the pack of cigarettes in her backpack seemed to make it twice as heavy.

* * *

Yumi arrived at the greenhouse late. Hana took one look at her and sniffed, "You smell like smoke, get out of my greenhouse before you kill my flowers. You can help in the back filling up the basins with soil. There's nothing alive back there for you to kill."

Yumi walked, defeated, into one of the unused rooms of the greenhouse. She worked with a few of the other garden workers who were also on Hana's bad side, unloading soil from the trucks and carrying them all the way back to the greenhouse, where they used the soil to fill pots and basins. It was hard work, and the soil got everywhere despite the gloves and apron Yumi wore.

Yumi had thought she was at the end of her wick when it came to endurance, but somehow she got through the toilsome experience and managed to stumble into the bathroom at the end of her shift to clean herself up.

Class wasn't much better. Yumi could barely keep her eyes open. Though, to her credit she managed it. Relief swept over her like a flood when lunch time came. It was quickly squashed at the though of summoning enough energy to pick herself up and head outside. Yumi didn't even feel like eating. Her head hit her desk and it stayed there. Everyone, including the teacher, left the classroom without sparing Yumi more than one or two odd looks.

Yumi wasn't sleeping. She was very aware that she was awake though that was just about all she was aware of. Yumi was aware that she awake and she was aware of her shoes. She stared at shoes against the tiled floor and distantly realized, with some distress, that even her _shoes_ seemed mismatched. They didn't belong walking over the polished perfect floors anymore than she did.

With her head bent, Yumi didn't see two figures stop in front of the class room door. She didn't see them exchange look or head into her classroom. She did, however, notice when two chairs squeaked against the floor and she noticed when a few seconds later two small thumps came, indicating people were now seated in those moved chairs.

She raised her head.

"Hey, Yu-chan! We didn't wake you did we?"

Yumi blinked. Sitting in front of her where Mitsukuni and Takashi. Mitsukuni had his lunch, which seemed to be just cake, sitting on Yumi's desk near where her head had been and was eating while he watched her. Takashi was holding his more normal - for Ouran at least - lunch on his lap and eating silently.

"Yu-chan?"

Yumi shook her head, "I wasn't sleeping." Was the only intelligent thing she could think to say.

"You shouldn't skip lunch, silly!" Mitsukuni admonished with a light-hearted air, "Right Takashi?" Takashi nodded.

"Especially when you work in the morning! Lunch is very important." He lectured.

Yumi stared at him for a second but then rolled her eyes, "Says the guy eating cake." She said dismissively. She grabbed her lunch box from under her seat and brought it up to her desk.

When she looked back at Mitsukuni his mouth was ajar.

"What...?" Yumi asked, wondering what she had said wrong.

"Cake is the best, Yu-chan!" He said protestingly.

Yumi rolled her eyes, though she found it secretly cute. He was such a kid. 'Boy Lolita' indeed.

"Sure," Yumi agreed in a dismissive way, "But it's hardly lunch food."

Takashi grunted his agreement.

"See, Morinozuka-senpai agrees with me." Yumi pointed out as she opened her lunch box.

"Aw, Yu-chan is so cute!" Mitsukuni said after a pregnant pause.

Yumi blinked at the sudden change, "Huh, what?" She asked confused before she quickly denied, "I am not!"

"Yes, you are!" Mitsukuni grinned brightly, "You're lecturing me like a mom!" He meant it teasingly but Yumi froze for a moment.

"Am not," she denied, looking away though she wasn't sure why, "It's just silly for you to lecture me about lunch when you're eating junk."

She took a bite out of the food Tamiko had prepared for her as if to prove her point.

"Cake isn't junk!" Mitsukuni protested looking appalled at the very idea.

Suddenly a fork was in front of her with a generous amount of cake on it.

"Try it!" Mitsukuni insisted.

Yumi felt her face heating up. "No." She said immediately, impulsively, not sure why she said it.

Mitsukuni's eyes widened and then began to water. Yumi was a sucker for that and she knew it.

"Fine!" Yumi said throwing her hands up in the air.

She reached for the fork but Mitsukuni pulled back out of her reach. When Yumi opened her mouth to complain, he pushed the cake between her lips with a grin.

The two stared at each other for a few moments and then Mitsukuni jerked back, letting go of the fork that was held firmly between Yumi's lips. He sat down in his seat properly instead of kneeling on it. Yumi replaced her hand where his had been on the fork and ignored the silly part of her that noticed that the fork was warm where his hand had been. Instead, she focused her attention on the cake in her mouth. It was one of the best cakes she had ever had.

"See, pretty great, isn't it?" Mitsukuni asked rhetorically, sounding almost sheepish, as if he was aware that he been too forward by basically feeding her. She stomach flipped at that thought.

Takashi was watching them with an intense look that threw Yumi. It reminded Yumi of the look one of the 'moms' of her old group home used to have in her eyes when she watched her soap-operas.

Yumi, at that moment, became aware that Mitsukuni wasn't being honest in the way he acted with her - or at least not completely. She wondered how much of the way he was behaving was an act to fit his "type" and how much of it was honestly him.

Yumi didn't judge him for the way he was acting. She did the same thing. She pretended all the time. She pretended that she was responsible. She pretended that she was nicer and more friendly than she was. She pretended that she fit in at this school. The cake suddenly felt sour in her mouth.

She swallowed and faked a smile, "Yeah, it's pretty good."

Mitsukuni grinned, "So do you forgive us?"

Yumi blinked, "What?"

"About Haruhi and her secret, do you forgive us?" Mitsukuni repeated, widening his eyes for maximum effect.

Yumi stared at him, "Yeah..." she said after a pause. "To be honest... I forgot all about that. That I was mad I mean, not the event. I mean... I'm sure you guys didn't mean to upset me." She shrugged, "I was being silly anyways."

"It's not silly to say how you feel, Yu-chan."

Yumi let out a startled bark of laughter. She gave Mitsukuni a sidelong look. He looked innocent enough, adorable really, but he _definitely_ a third-year. Yumi took another bite of her lunch as an excuse not to reply.

After she finished her bite she picked up a bite for with her chopsticks. She held it out to him. "You try."

"What?" Mitsukuni exclaimed, jumping back. His back bumped slightly against the back of his seat. His reaction made Yumi smile.

"What, you don't eat things that _won't_ rot your teeth out?" She teased.

Mitsukuni pouted, "I brush my teeth three times a day!"

"Just try it," Yumi coaxed, "I promise it's good."

Acting as if Yumi had just tried to strong arm him into eating broccoli instead of a bite of a bento box, Mitsukuni squeezed his eyes closed and opened his mouth. She popped the bite into his mouth and watched him with equal amounts of amusement and exasperation.

He opened his eyes wide as he chewed and looked at Yumi with excitement.

"That's really good Yu-chan!" He said, bouncing in his seat in a way that reminded Yumi of Sora. "Did you make it?"

Yumi laughed outright, "No," she shook her head, "You're alive aren't you?"

Mitsukuni's eyes widened at the idea of cooking so terrible it could kill, "You can't be that bad!"

"Oh, I have it on high authority that I am." Yumi shook her head. "No, my friend made that. She runs a bakery but she's also just an all around good cook."

Mitsukuni's eyes widened, "Does she make cake?" He asked.

Yumi and Takashi exchanged a shared look of exasperation, or at least, Yumi thought they did. She wasn't sure how well she could read his expressions.

"Yes, she has cake." Yumi said with an indulgent smile, "It's called 'Love + Flour Bakery'. You should check it out," Yumi offered. She didn't really want Mitsukuni showing up where she lived, that would be embarrassing. It was loyalty to Tamiko that made Yumi offer.

They talked a while longer with Takashi watchign on silently as seemed to be his way. Occasionally he would grunt out a short reply, usually when prompted by Mitsukuni. As the conversation went on, Yumi began to feel comfortable enough to throw questions his way - though only ones with simple answers. When the bell rang and the two got up to leave, Yumi was actually sorry to see them go.

As Takashi stood up he put his palm on the top of her head and ruffled her hair slightly. Yumi stared up at him in surprise. She was pretty sure that was a good sign.

Mitsukuni smiled broadly and gave Yumi an exaggerated wave."We'll see you around, Yu-chan!"

"Ah.. Yes, goodbye..." Yumi said softer, waving them off.

When class started up again, Yumi didn't have to struggle quite as much to care. The crushing despair she had felt before, Yumi realized with wry humor, had been solved with a simple pick-me-up. Yumi tried to pretend that it had just been lunch, that she had just been hungry, but she knew that large part was owed to her company.

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A/N: Please remember, reviews are the most motivating thing to writers. ;)


	7. Descent into Wonderland

**Full Summary:** Some girls grow tired watching their sibling on the banks of a river. However, some girls are too busy working to merely grow tired watching. When Yumi Taka was accepted to Ouran Academy, she thought she had found her jar of Orange Marmalade. However, when she discovers Haruhi's "little secret", her whole life goes awry. After a chase bullying incident, she finds her jar of marmalade to be frightfully empty. Not wanting to drop the jar, she descends into the adventures of the Host Club and Wonderland. Can they help her find her way home? Will she even want to go home afterwards? Most importantly, can they help her find herself? And just maybe, on the way back, she can fill her jar with just a little bit of Honey.

A/N: Yes, this story is still on going. I haven't abandoned it! This chapter has just been giving me fits.

* * *

 **Chapter Seven**

 **Descent** **Into Wonderland**

After school, Yumi headed towards the greenhouse to get her assignment from Hana. She was still embarrassed about the incident that morning and hoped Hana had forgotten about it - or at least had moved past it.

When she walked into the greenhouse, Hana was fussing over some small flower that seemed to be in poor health. The elderly woman didn't even look in Yumi's direction. It was hard to tell if she was still mad or just being her usual surly self.

"The Host Club is having some big event in the ballroom this Saturday."

"I've heard..." Yumi responded, confused. Hana didn't gossip nor did she talk about anything that didn't directly relate to Ouran's gardens.

"They requested that I send someone to help them with floral arrangements." Hana paused as she lifted up a watering can, "They specifically requested you."

"Me?" Yumi baulked. "Junko's better at that sort of thing."

"I know. I told them that-"

Yumi winced. Hana _was_ still mad about this morning. That was the only explanation for her offering up Junko for the job, when Hana was intimately aware of how terrible she was at controlling herself around those boys - particularly when it came time to pay.

"-but they insisted. So off you go."

With that, Yumi was dismissed. There would be no protesting or requesting she send someone else, and even if she did, Yumi would just be put on soil filling duty. A task that she had come to loath.

All there was left for Yumi to do was to head to the ballroom where she was supposed to meet up with the Host Club.

Yumi wasn't sure what she expected to find when she walked into the ballroom. Her only experiences with the Host Club were: one formal encounter, one obnoxious encounter, and two lunches with three of the members. It really wasn't enough to give her an idea of what their group dynamics were. What Yumi _did_ expect was that the ballroom be at least somewhat put together. Flowers were usually one of the last stages of preparation and the ball was on Saturday - and it was Friday _._

Instead, Yumi stared in detached horror. The ballroom was nowhere put together. If the staff didn't dust it frequently Yumi doubted even that much would have been done. Haruhi was dancing with some girl, clearly taking lessons. The twins were chasing Tamaki around chanting "pervert" (and no, Yumi didn't want to know why). Mitsukuni had joined them with Takashi watching on, like Yumi, though he seemed more amused than horrified. Kyoya was over at a table, pouring over files and plans, Yumi was sure they were for the ball, at least she _hoped_ they were. She was sure they had at least that much done.

Though there weren't even a dozen people in the room, it was easy for Yumi to walk into the room without attracting any attention by keeping to the sides of the room. As she approached Kyoya, whom she had identified as the _real_ leader of this band of misfits at their first meeting, he showed no signs of noticing her. If Yumi were in a charitable mood she might have increased the volume of her steps to give Kyoya a head's up. Yumi was rarely in a charitable mood and certainly not for rich bastards who couldn't even arrange their own events.

"Is there a reason you dragged me out of the gardens?" Yumi asked as took a seat at one of the chairs that Kyoya had moved into the ballroom along with the small table.

If Yumi surprised Kyoya with her sudden appearance he didn't show it. He didn't even look up from his laptop.

Yumi felt her blood begin to pump in irritation, "Junko is better at this sort of thing as me. As Watanabe-san told you." She informed him firmly.

Kyoya's eyes flickered up to hers before quickly returning to his papers, "Given the generous tip you received last time, one would expect you to be excited to be chosen."

Yumi would have called the remark cheeky, if Kyoya had offered any inflection whatsoever. Instead he said it straight. It was another half-answer, apparently all members of the Host Club were experts at answering, not really answering, questions.

Yumi shrugged, "Not saying I'm not grateful or anything," she told him frankly, "Doesn't mean I'm not suspicious."

Kyoya nodded his head. Whether it was in agreement or acknowledgment, Yumi wasn't sure. He didn't comment but said instead, "We required someone of your discretion."

Yumi saw straight through that particular brand of bullshit. "You mean, someone who doesn't have any secrets to uncover."

Kyoya _again_ didn't respond prompting Yumi to roll her eyes. She wondered what had crawled up his butt and died, and also how the great Ootori doctors hadn't managed to get it out.

By this point, the other members of the Host Club had spotted her. Mitsukuni noticed her first and had made a beeline for her, but his flight path was intercepted by Tamaki, whose long legs helped him beat Mitsukuni to Yumi.

"Ah! Our beautiful garden flower!" Tamaki exclaimed, skidding to a stop at Yumi's side.

He caught her hand before Yumi could slip it innocuously into her pocket to avoid _Mister Handsy_. Tamaki held her hand up to his cheek reverently. Yumi noticed in a detached away that his cheeks were soft. She wondered what sort of face cream he used.

"It is wonderful that you have come to assist us!" Tamaki pronounced with a dramatic flair, "We could use some help getting everything ready for our lovely ladies. They are absolutely depending on us!" He sing songed.

Yumi wondered if there was a way to get her hand away from him without being overly rude.

"I wouldn't be having so much trouble, Tamaki," Kyoya snapped, "If you would decide on a theme."

Yumi's head swung to Kyoya, her eyes rounding in shock, "It's the day before the ball and you haven't decided on a _theme_ yet?" She asked, shocked.

She had thought that they just hadn't set up the room yet. She had hoped they had been lazy and she had feared that they expected her to do all the heavy lifting. She never expected them to be so far behind. If this was the result of their rich parents pouring money into their fancy, special education Yumi was not impressed. So much for this being an easy job.

"Well there are so many wonderful ways to decorate the room!" Tamaki explained theatrically - or at least, he acted as if that was an explanation, to Yumi it was not.

"Perhaps you could pick one within our budget?" Kyoya rebuffed. It was phrased like a suggestion, but the threat behind it was clear.

Yumi almost felt pity for Kyoya. She understood, intimately well, how hard it was stay on a budget, and she didn't have a fanciful Tamaki to inflate her costs. Then she remembered the price range that the Host Club were working under, and all her sympathy for Kyoya vanished and she felt even _more_ disdain for Tamaki.

Tamaki, who seemed to Yumi to be more than a bit of a time waster, surprised her by jumping straight into the task. He showed Yumi the various ideas they had (Kyoya made sure to point out the costs). Yumi felt like she was brought in to be a tiebreak and not a floral arranger. It was becoming abundantly clear why Kyoya had requested her and not Junko. They could have been at least honest in their request for her. Yumi wasn't enjoying all the surprise that kept coming her way. Though she suspected the sadistic Kyoya did enjoy it.

As Kyoya pointed out the prices of everything, Yumi felt like she had been sucker punched. She still couldn't believe how much they were willing to spend on something that was little more than a glorified school dance. She did not, however, express those thoughts aloud, who knew what sort of fit that would send Tamaki into. It might have been enough to send Kyoya into a rant as well.

"Yu-chan, you look pale."

Yumi swung her head towards Mitsukuni in surprise. She hadn't even heard the little mite walk up! As swung her head towards him, their noses almost bumped.

Yumi was embarrassed to admit that she actually _squeaked_ in surprise.

"T-too close!" She protested. Instead of swinging her face away like she usually would have, she froze.

Mitsukuni gave her a grin that looked too smirkish to fit his "boy lolita" look.

"Yu-chan is cute when she's scared." He said teasingly.

"You didn't scare me!" Yumi fired back immediately, this time able to break eye contact, "You just startled me!"

"So, Taka-san, what is your imput?" Kyoya implored, bringing Yumi back to the matter at hand. Yumi turned her attention away from the boy-lolita and back to Kyoya. She caught his glasses glinted in the light, which let her know that she had better agree with him.

Tamaki slid between Mitsukuni and Yumi, half bumping the smaller boy out of the way. One of his arms slipped over her shoulder, as he pulled her close to him, making a ploy to win her over to his side.

"You agree with me, don't you Yumi- _hime_?" He practically _purred_ in her ear.

Instinctively, Yumi jerked away, nearly falling out of her chair which suddenly felt suffocatingly small.

"Uh, bigger isn't always better," she managed to squeak out. Her cheeks flushed. The boys back home would have had a field day with that innuendo. However, the Ouran boys were far too dignified - or naive - to make those sort of jokes (well, Yumi suspected the twins weren't). Yumi wasn't sure if she was disappointed or not.

She cleared her throat, blaming dehydration on her voice and not the suffocatingly close attractive men. Even if she thought they were silly ninnies, she was still female.

"You want the focus to be on you, so you shouldn't make the background all that..." Yumi searched for a polite words to phrase Tamaki's taste, "loud and gaudy."

Apparently those words hadn't been the right words. Tamaki wheeled dramatically away from her (at least that solved her personal space issue). In Yumi's mind's eye, she could picture her words turning into an arrow that went straight through Tamaki's chest. He collapsed into a darkened corner of the room. Yumi also imagined mushroom sprouting out of his head. He began to mutter but his words were too soft and strung together too fast to be coherent. Yumi was able to make out something about harsh princesses. Served him right, she was no princess.

Kyoya arched an eyebrow at the scene but didn't seem too put off by Yumi's blunt words and Tamaki's consequential dramatic reaction- if Yumi didn't know better she would have thought he was _amused_.

"I just meant..." she tried again, "The focus should be on you - the hosts - and not the scenery. So you want something more _subtle_..."

Yumi filed away for future reference that instead of pointing out what people were doing wrong she should focus on what they should be doing.

Later, Yumi would wonder just out exactly the Host Club had managed to wrangle her into helping out without even directly asking for it. Maybe it was her nature or maybe it was their subtle manipulation techniques. You didn't get as popular as the Host Club was without learning how to manipulate people after all.

Yet, with little prompting from the Host Club, Yumi found herself beginning to outline what the Host Club should do. She was no interior designer, but she did have a fairly good eye for what looked right. Yumi had often helped Youke Suzuki, Tamiko's grandmother, pick things out for her house back in Karuizawa. Yumi had really enjoyed rearranging Suzuki's house and Suzuki had always been surprisingly tolerate about it.

Kyoya nodded his head as Yumi began to but her thoughts to words, "That is a very good idea, Taka-san, elegant but not too expensive. This is exactly what I had in mind."

Yumi fought down a blush. She hadn't really thought it up originally, really. She had taken bits and pieces of what Kyoya and Tamaki had suggested and put it into one piece.

"Your thoughts aren't original and eventually Tamaki and I would have come to a similar conclusion but you cut down the time that would have taken. You make a very effective middle man."

Yumi stared at him blankly. Apparently Kyoya only dealt in backhanded compliments.

* * *

Yumi came to discover that the easy part was figuring out a theme. Not that that dealing with Kyoya and Tamaki's clashing personalities had been easy. Now she had to make it actually happen.

Yumi and Kyoya poured over various magazines and called up distributors to see what could be delivered today or tomorrow afternoon, anything else was out of the question. That was a difficult enough task, but to add to it there was always Tamaki, leaning over their shoulders, pushing them towards the more expensive and the more extravagant. His strategies didn't exactly work, though he was very good at getting Yumi's blood pumping uncomfortably and irritating Kyoya. The two second years took turns snapping at the poor boy, sending him running to the corner crying about "mommy being mean".

"'Mommy'?" Yumi asked, turning to look at Kyoya.

"Apparently I'm the mother in our little 'family'."

Yumi tensed a bit at the word "family" and almost scoffed. It was funny how people who already had families wanted more, and people like her - Yumi stopped that line of thought. She didn't know their family situation. She knew she shouldn't make assumptions and judgments.

She faked a smile and buried herself back in their work before Kyoya could notice her reaction. If Kyoya noticed anything off about Yumi, he didn't say. He was quickly engrossed back into their work as well. Kyoya appeared to be something of a workaholic.

The afternoon passed away quickly into evening and Yumi's shift ended which meant, work done or not, she _would_ be leaving. As she stood Kyoya spoke up, "You work on Saturdays don't you?"

Yumi knew exactly where this was going, "Yes..." she answered because she had to.

"I'll be requesting that you come and assist with the set up tomorrow."

Yumi bit back a groan, though her way her whole body moved implied the groan even if her vocal cords didn't. Tomorrow there would be heavy lifting, and she doubted she could rely on the Host Club to help her.

"Thanks for letting me know," was all she said.

She had the feeling tomorrow was going to be a long day.

* * *

Please favorite, follow, and review! Seriously, reviews make it a _lot_ easier to work through dry spells.


	8. Painting the Roses Red

A/N: I don't usually clarify things outside of the story but I just wanted to point out that when Yumi and Hani are called "the same height" it was not an absolutely literal statement. If you remember, in an earlier chapter Yumi was excited that she was taller than Hani. Yumi is 5'1" while Hani is 4'11", so she's two inches taller than him. Yumi's height, while definitely short, is not really anything spectacular. She's on the shorter end of the average height spectrum.

Also, here's a gift of a super long chapter! Don't get used to them being this long. This one just sort of ran away from me.

* * *

 **Chapter Eight**

 **Painting the Roses Red**

Yumi was not a morning person. Just because she got up early everyday did not mean she enjoyed it. _Necessity_ had her up early. The weeks of an early morning schedule had not magically transformed Yumi into a morning person. She was awake, alert, and pissed as hell about it. The fact that she had to be up earlier than her usual schedule made it worse. Even though Yumi worked on Saturdays, she still got to sleep in a little bit more than she did during the weekdays.

This Saturday morning however, Yumi did not get to sleep in. Instead she was getting ready to go help the Host Club with a task that was not in her job description, a task that she shouldn't be doing at all. She had been called in to help with _floral arrangements_. Now she was inexplicably planning a ball. Yumi wasn't sure how she managed to get herself into these situations. It had to be her pride. She was a walking lesson of Hubris.

Yumi shook her sleepy, bitter thoughts away and threw off the covers, launching herself headfirst into her morning routine, before hurtling down the stairs. If she stopped moving, Yumi was pretty sure she was just going to fall back asleep.

It was amazing that no matter how early Yumi got up Tamiko was always up and busy by the time she made it down to the stairs.

"Don't even try sneaking by today!" Tamiko called to Yumi, before she had even made it to the final step.

"Huh? Who are you talking to, Himura-san?"

Yumi froze at the familiar voice. She knew that voice, though she was having trouble placing it with a name or even a face. With trepidation Yumi walked down the last few flights.

There was an awkward silence as Yumi just stared at the newcomer to Himura's bakery. For a moment she was convinced that she was dreaming and this was some very realistic nightmare. However as the seconds ticked by Yumi realized that it wasn't.

Both Yumi and the not-so-stranger seemed to come out of their surprised stupor at the same time, because they both let out a chorus of "YOU?!" Yumi's cry was full of distress. Oshiro Yuuto on the other hand was more surprised by Yumi's appearance instead of distressed.

Though Yumi had accepted that this moment was real, it was happening, it still took her a few more moments to process the reality. Standing right in front of her was Oshiro Yuuto, the young adult who had bought her cigarettes the day before.

For a moment, Yumi flashed back to all of the times she and the group home kids had gotten into trouble out in the woods. Perhaps they had accidentally committed sacrilege to some forgotten shrine. It was the only explanation Yumi could think of for her string of bad luck. She had to have pissed off kami, nobody was _naturally_ this unlucky.

"Oh, good you two know each other and get along." Tamiko's sarcastic voice broke in. "I should have know two troublemakers would have managed to find each other without my help."

"You didn't tell me you were looking for a job at a bakery, Yuuto-san," Yumi sneered, "If you had I would have warned Tamiko-san about you."

Yuuto looked surprised, and rightly so. Their last encounter hadn't been antagonistic. It really wasn't Yuuto's fault that Yumi didn't want him there, and she was in no mood at this early hour to even pretend that she did. It tore her up inside to see the sign and symbol of her weakness just _standing_ there at the cash register.

Yumi, perhaps unjustly, blamed Yuuto for buying her the cigarettes. He had thrown temptation in her face in a moment of weakness. At the time, Yumi had been grateful, she had thought it a blessing, but that feeling had evaporated quickly. The cigarettes still felt heavy in her backpack. She was too ashamed to leave it in her room for Tamiko or the twins to fine. Having it on her wasn't much easier on her conscious as she was always nervous someone would accidentally find it at school.

Yuuto, however, had no idea of the guilt he had inflicted on her. His only memory of their interaction would be positive, albeit bittersweet, but still positive. He probably thought he did her a kindness. Only Yumi knew that the opposite was true. She, perhaps unfairly, resented him for it.

Yuuto was clearly surprised by Yumi's hostility but he wasted no breath in retaliating. With unnatural ease he pinpointed exactly what to do to get under her skin the quickest.

"You're so kind, Yumi- _pyon_ to look out for Himura-san like that." He returned her sneer, "Himura-san do you want to know how Yumi- _chan_ and I met?"

Yumi's stomach dropped and for a brief moment she wondered if she could get away with homicide with a witness in the room, before Yuuto finished that thought, and not get caught.

"Save it, Oshiro." Tamiko said sternly, stopping Yumi's thoughts of homicide, "I don't care. It's up to Yumi if she wants to tell me about whatever trouble the _two of you_ got into. I'm fully aware of the issues both of you come with," that last sentence was aimed more at Yumi then at Yuuto, judging by the way Tamiko's steely eyes fixed on her.

Yumi felt rightly chided. She knew she was being unreasonable towards Yuuto. She also knew that things were tough for him just like they were for her. They had both talked about it. She really ought to at least try to control her frustration. It was just so _unfair._ The one time she had opened up to a strange she thought she was never going to meet again, and now he was working where she lived. It was so terrible it was almost comical.

"You two are going to keep your childish sniping outside of my bakery." Tamiko informed them, knowing better than to order them to get along.

Even though Tamiko had _just_ admonished them, Yumi found herself sneering at him again the moment Tamiko turned her back. She had never been good at letting others have the last word. Since Yumi couldn't really retort after Tamiko's lecture she settled on a dirty look.

Walking past the counter, Yumi swiped up a pastry, "Sorry Tamiko-san, I can't stay for breakfast. I'll see you later."

Tamiko, either irritated at Yumi's attitude or knowing better than to try to get Yumi to stay when she didn't want to, didn't protest at Yumi's early exit. She just wished her off, and gave her pointed look. Yumi wasn't sure what the look was about, but she suspected she wanted her to say goodbye to Yuuto.

Instead, Yumi gave Yuuto another dirty look that he returned with a wink. Yumi's face lit up and she practically fled the bakery. He was such a strange boy. Yumi didn't know many boys who responded to a bitchy attitude with a flirtation. She suspected that he was just trying to get under her skin and, damn him, it was working.

Yumi unlocked her bike and set off, more than a little put off by the sudden shifts in events. She didn't like change. Change was rarely ever a good thing back in Karuizawa and Yumi saw no reason why that principle wouldn't apply to Tokyo. More than that, Yumi just wanted everything to be _stop_ being so complicated. There was always something new popping up, always a new problem to deal with. Yumi didn't think she was asking for too much when she requested a breather.

As Yumi peddled her way towards Ouran she wondered again just what forgotten shrine kami she and her friends had pissed off. A bitter part of her wished that her friends were suffering as well though she quickly snuffed that feeling. Maybe this was this whole balance thing her Buddist friend back in Karuizawa like to babble on about. Yumi had made it to Ouran - somewhere she clearly didn't belong - so now the world was righting the balance.

Yumi attempted to throw away her melodrama as she parked her bike and headed towards the ballroom she was supposed to help set up. That melodrama came back and hit her upside the head like a boomerang.

* * *

As soon as Yumi entered the ballroom she realized that she was the _first_ person there. To add the cherry to Yumi's frustration sundae there was a delivery man waiting around looking a bit lost with a few giant packages of what Yumi could safely assume were the tall stands for the floral arrangements.

Yumi was now faced with a dilemma: somehow get him to let her sign for the packages or hope the Host Club got here before he decided to try again tomorrow. If that happened, Yumi wasn't sure what Kyoya would do to her but she wasn't about to risk it. Yumi needed to get her charm on, which was not a skill Yumi possessed. She approuched the man with a friendly smile. He seemed to work with Ouran students enough not just to ride her off as some teen.

"Hello, I can sign for that," she said in her most pleasant tone. She even threw in a polite smile to add to the effect.

"Ah, I don't think you're a Ootori Kyoya - or an Ootori."

"No, I'm not," Yumi agreed easily, "But I work for him, and I am authorized to sign for that." That was a bold faced lie - or rather, Yumi assumed Kyoya wouldn't mind that she did sign for them, but she certainly wasn't _authorized._

The delivery man shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot. Apparently what Yumi was suggesting wasn't uncommon, because he didn't look like he didn't believe her. He looked like he was uncomfortable at allowing her to sign it. She could tell that he was too much of a "by-the-rules" type for straight charm to work. Yumi was almost relieved, brow beating came much more naturally to her.

" _Ootori-san_ has better things to do then to sign for packages, Haitatsunin-san(1)." Yumi pointed out neutrally, as if she was used to explaining this. She put emphasis on Kyoya's surname, hoping that the family was none for being surly (she wouldn't be surprise) and reminding the delivery man how important Kyoya was.

" _Ootori-san_ will be very cross," she continued, "if I have to go fetch him to sign for a package that I could have very easily signed." It was a threat but Yumi made sure to keep her tone even and not threatening at all. The uneasy vibe the man was radiating increased, but this time for a different reason.

Now, Yumi just had to hit it home. She faked a sympathetic smile, "Listen," she dropped her volume a bit as if she was letting him in a secret, "just between you and me, my boss can be a little-" Yumi gave a tight smile, letting the delivery man fill it in for himself. His imagination would fill it in better than Yumi could, "-I really don't want him to yell at you or call your overseer or anything like that." She winced as if concerned on his behalf, "You know how _Ootoris_ can be."

By the time she had finished her little show the man was pale and even looked like he was sweating. Internally, Yumi grinned a little and mentally thanked Kubo-sensei for forcing her to take drama as an "outlet" instead of giving her detention. She had hated it at the time, but she was glad to see her time hadn't been completely wasted.

The man didn't say a word but nodded his had frantically and pushed the clipboard into her hand. Yumi signed it briskly and wished the man a good day. It had been a few months since the last time Yumi had seen someone flee her presence like that. She managed to refrain laughing until he was out of earshot.

Her laughed didn't laugh long. The Host Club was now at a whomping 20 minutes late and Yumi was an impatient sort and she really didn't want to have to be setting up for the party any longer then she had to. Even though the Host Club wasn't here, she was going to get to work.

Of course, now Yumi had to figure out how she was going to move these flower pillars. They weren't exactly light and they were almost her size. She hoped she would think of a plan as she got them out of their cardboard boxes. She didn't.

Using sheer force of will, Yumi managed to begin to move one pillar inch by inch into position, awkwardly waddling it over. Internally, Yumi was cursing Kyoya for not hiring workers. If he was going to waste that much money he could have at least spent _some_ of it practically.

It was in the middle of moving the pillar that Yumi came to the sudden realization that there was no way she could keep moving it at the worst moment. The weight settled heavily on her upper torso and Yumi found herself without the strength to piviot the pillar and push it back upright. By the time her adrenline kicked in at the realization that if she didn't push she would be crushed, it was an uphill battle (more so then it had been initially). Yumi was saved from an embarrassing demise via floral stand by a firm hand that pushed it back with an ease that made Yumi more than a little jealous.

Glancing up, Yumi's eyes clashed with dark grey.

"You okay?" Takashi asked gruffly.

Yumi's cheeks flushed in embarrassment. Not only had Takashi saved her from an embarrassing demise caused by her own hubris but he was towering over her with her almost leaning into his back. She slipped out from between him and the pillar and pointedly refused to make eye contact.

"Yeah thanks," she grumbled, enunciating poorly so that it sounded like one word instead of two.

"Hai," Takashi acknowledged simply, not put off by Yumi borderline rude ingratitude.

To Yumi's surprise he put his hand on her head and ruffled her hair, mussing some of it out of her side-bun. "Hey!" She protested- more because she liked protesting then any actual distress (her hair was always a mess anyway) and turned her eyes back to Takashi intending to give him a playful glare.

To her further surprise, Takashi's cheekbones (which were rather impressive now that she was paying them attention) were flushed with a slight blush.

"Cute," he told her. Yumi was pretty sure the look he was giving her was an amused one. Yumi's brows crinkled together and she wondered if Morinozuka Takashi _teasing_ her.

Whatever strange moment was happening between Takashi and Yumi was interrupted by Mitsukuni prancing between them and exclaiming loudly, "Wow, Yu-chan! Have you been moving these all on your own? You must be really strong!"

Without asking her permission (a concept that seemed foreign to all Host Club members), Mitsukuni started squeezing her arm lightly.

"What are you doing?" Yumi asked indignantly, pulling away.

"I'm trying to feel your muscles!" Mitsukuni told her as if it was supposed to be obvious.

Yumi stared at him blankly, "That's not how you feel someone's muscles," she deadpanned.

"Woah, woah," the twins chimed in, sliding over to Yumi and Mitsukuni in way that reminded Yumi, unkindly, of eels.

"So this is the kudere type!" They cooed.

Yumi wasn't sure when they had arrived. It was obviously after Takashi had saved her since they were teasing her about her interactions with Mitsukuni and not her embarrassing almost death. Still they came out of nowhere and it took every inch of willpower for Yumi not to jump up. She did jolt slightly, which earned her an amused looked from Mitsukuni. She pointedly ignored it.

"Brats." She accused bluntly, playing off her surprise cooly.

What would have sent their leading flying off to a dark corner of the room just made the twins smile and they slid their arms around her smaller shoulders (apparently the Host Club didn't understand the concept of "personal space" either).

"Brats?" They repeated, "You wound us, Yumi-senpai."

"I doubt anything I could say would actually wound you."

Whatever retort that was on the twins lips were cut off by the appearance of Kyoya and Tamaki. It was strange that they were arriving together and Yumi wondered if that wasn't connected to the evil look Kyoya was sending him.

The moment Tamaki locked eyes with Yumi he was sprinting at her at full speed and _dived_ behind her.

"Fair princess!" Tamaki exclaimed (Yumi felt a migraine coming on), "Please turn your earthy beauty on Kyoya to soothe his wild rage!"

Yumi quirked a dark eyebrow. Her first thought was, "earthy beauty?" But Yumi decided not to give Tamaki an opportunity to insult either her appearance or her social class so she decided to say instead, "Yeah, I don't think Kyoya is the type to be soothed by beauty."

Kyoya stalked over to them and glared down at Tamaki from over the top of Yumi's head. Hiding behind the short girl was probably not a very wise idea on Tamaki's part. After giving him a final glare, Kyoya turned his eyes to Yumi instead. His glare disappeared, though he was still clearly in a bad mood.

"I apologize for my tardiness," He said to Yumi's surprise. She had unkindly assumed Kyoya didn't know how to apologize. " _Someone_ decided to mess with my alarm clock." It was pretty obvious who the someone was.

"Ah. Well." was all Yumi said. She wasn't going to say it was okay, because they had wasted time and she had almost gotten herself squashed, but she wasn't going to be a bitch about it either.

With Kyoya and Tamaki's appearance the Host Club was assembled and it was time to get to work, minus Haruhi who had been told to stay at home. There wasn't much for her to do and the Host Club thought she could spend her time better getting ready. Although Yumi wondered what exactly Haruhi had to do to get ready. She was coming as a _boy_ it wasn't like she had to do hair and make up.

The boys got to work moving the floral stands and Yumi hung back since it had been proven that she couldn't handle that task. Kyoya, to Yumi's surprise, also hung back wanting to talk to her about something in semi-private (if the Host Club was in the room, Yumi doubted any conversation no matter how removed was really private).

"The stands were not meant to be delivery until later. I'm surprised you managed to get them to let you sign it."

Yumi arched an eyebrow, noting the lack of apology. She was beginning to think the first one was just to spite Tamaki. "Oh, I just told him I was working for you and then reminded him of your reputation."

This time Kyoya arched an eyebrow, "I have a reputation?"

Yumi's other eyebrow joined the first, "Seriously?"

* * *

Apparently, Kyoya had _not_ hired workers and when Yumi questioned him about it he had said, "You know how to do everything, you can just tell us what to do". Yumi was surprised that someone with so much money could be such a cheap bastard. Maybe the rumors about the Host Club serving their guests instant coffee wasn't a tall-tale after all.

Although, in Kyoya's defense, he wasn't wrong. The most complicated thing the Host Club had to set up were the tables wear the food would go. Yumi and Kyoya had convinced Tamaki to save on money and buy plastic, fold-out tables since they were just going to be covered with tablecloths anyway.

Fold out tables weren't all that hard to set up. However the Host Club managed to mess it up in ways that Yumi hadn't though possible. It was frankly a miracle that nobody had lost a finger or broken a bone. Other than that mishap, it was just setting up seats for the orchestra and for tired guests to sit on.

Once the Fold-Out Tables Debacle (and yes it deserved capitalization) was over, Yumi spent most of the time on the flower arrangements. Yumi had various flowers in different amounts laid out on a large cloth in front of her. She had spent most of the night trying out different arrangements in her head. Now she just had to get her hands and her eyes to match her imagination. It wasn't really that complicated of an arrangement, it didn't need to be and really shouldn't be, but Yumi wanted to do something to give it something a little special even if it was rather generic.

While she was working, Mitsukuni drifted over to her, apparently on a water break. Yumi didn't blame him, moving all those chairs around was more hard work than it looked. He sat down in front of her mat full of flowers and watched her. They spent a few minutes in comfortable silence before he spoke up.

"Ne, Yu-chan?" He said to grab her attention before he asked, "Where did you learn _ikebana_ (2)?"

Yumi didn't bother to repress a scoff, "This is hardly ikebana, Haninozuka-senpai."

Mitsukuni shook his head which Yumi noticed though her attention was focused on her task.

"You might not being doing it now, but I can tell you know it."

Yumi glanced up with a quirked eyebrow.

"Ka-chan practices ikebana. The face you're making... it reminds me of the one she makes when she's practicing."

Yumi hummed, acknowledging his words but not commenting on it. After a minute or so of silence Yumi decided to share with Mitsukuni, "A lady I was friends with back in Karuizawa knew a little and she taught it to me. I don't know where she picked it up. Watanabe-san also knows it and she teaches it when the mood strikes her."

"But I'd hardly call myself a student of ikebana." She continued with a shrug, "I don't have any formal education, just what I've managed to pick up over the years."

Mitsukuni stared at her for a few moments before giving her a dazzling smile. He had a nice smile Yumi decided as she ducked her head back behind her flower arrangement.

"Thanks for sharing with me, Yu-chan."

Yumi scoffed, "It's not like it was a secret or anything, Haninozuka-senpai."

Mitsukuni gave Yumi a softer smile, with a secretive look in his eye. Yumi wasn't sure what he was thinking. Another silence grew between them. Mitsukuni watched her work and Yumi focused on her task, once she got the first one done the way she wanted it, it would be easy to recreate for all the others.

"Ne, Yu-chan?"

Yumi's eyebrow quirked up to show she was listening.

"Why don't you call me 'Haninozuka'? We're friends, you know. You call me just Hani, like everyone else."

Deciding to get back at him for all the times he had teased her, Yumi looked up and met his eyes with a sly smile, "Hai, hai," she agreed, "I _could._ But I'd rather be the one person at school who calls you 'Haninozuka'." She winked and watched in amusement as Mitsukuni turned red all the way up to his ears.

One of the twins (Hikaru? Maybe?) called for Mitsukuni to get back to work, an order that Mitsukuni responded to promptly, jumping to his feet and running off as if a swarm of bees were chasing him. Yumi watched him flee in amusement. If Mitsukuni found her as fun to tease as she did for him, it was no wonder he kept teasing her.

* * *

Honestly, Yumi didn't have as miserable a time helping the Host Club as she thought she would. She found herself forgetting all about her miserable morning and the problems that awaited her back at the house. In fact, by the time it was finished Yumi was almost sorry to see it done.

"Yu-chan!" Mitsukuni pranced over to her as she finished setting the last flower arrangement into place. "Are you coming to the dance tonight?"

Yumi arched an eyebrow wondering how Mitsukuni had forgotten how she had thrown their invitation back in their face. She turned away, trying to busy herself with fixing a nonexistent problem with the arrangement.

"No." She managed to answer once she felt a bit more distracted and didn't feel those brown eyes baring down on her.

"The invitation is still on the table, you know." Tamaki said kindly with a seriousness that Yumi hadn't seen from him before.

Yumi's fingers froze for a split second before she responded firmly, though she not as unkind about it as she been beforem "I don't need your charity."

"It's not charity, Yu-chan!" Mitsukuni protested sounding distressed.

"I'm not comfortable accepting it for free and I don't have the funds to waste on a dance. It wouldn't be just the price of the ticket you know, but a dress and all that."

"We could help with that!" The twins said, jumping in to the conversation. "We could get you a dress."

Yumi quickly shook her head wanting to dialogue that thought from the twins' heads before it could take root. "I said no charity."

"It would be a gift!"

"I'm not comfortable accepting such an extravagant gift from people I just met."

The twins shrugged finally letting it go. They said with some acidity, "Yumi-senpai probably doesn't even know how to dance." They sounded like petulant children when they didn't get their way.

Yumi took the out they provided even if it was an insult, "That too."

Mitsukuni started to pout but before he could go full "puppy dog eyes" a big hand fell down on his. Yumi breathed a sigh of relief as Takashi coming to her rescue. She even gave him a grateful smile and Takashi nodded his head. At least _someone_ respected her wishes.

"We shall miss your presence at the ball, fair princess!" Tamaki proclaimed dramatically, letting the matter drop. Yumi had expected him to try to push the matter, but he didn't. Maybe Tamaki had _some_ tact after all.

Shortly after that, Yumi departed and began her bike ride home, ready and eager to crash into her bed. Despite all the delays she got home earlier than she expected. Tomorrow would be one of the few days Yumi would wake up fully rested, and after downing a big lunch and changed into clothes that weren't soaked with sweat, Yumi collapsed onto her bed. Tamiko didn't even try to wake her up for dinner which was a good thing because Yumi was dead to the world. Her dreams were filled with ball gowns, chandeliers made out of diamonds, and warm brown eyes that followed her through a floral scent that hung heavy in the air.

* * *

1) Haitatsunin literally means "delivery person" in Japanese. Unlike in English, in Japanese, it is polite to address people by their occupation when you don't know their name - and sometimes even when you do. In business settings, an employer will usually call their boss not by their name but by their actual title. Assistant manager, for example.

2) Ikebana translated literally as "living flowers" or the "way of flowers". It is more than simply putting flowers in a container, ikebana is a disciplined form of art which strived to bring nature and humanity together.

A/N: Yeah, I know some of you expected her to go to the ball. Sorry to disappoint, but I thought that I had made it clear that Yumi was not going to accept a free invitation. Her pride just wouldn't allow it for more than one reason. Also we have spent _eight_ chapters just in episode _three_ of the anime. I figured it was time to get a move on.

Remember, reviews make for a very happy and motivated author!


	9. The Queen's Garden

**Chapter Nine**

 **The Queen's Garden**

The Monday following the ball was a tired one for most of the student body of Ouran Academy. Most students, particularly the female population, had attended the Host Club's ball. The ones who hadn't, had taken advantage of the reduced homework load for their own amusement. This led to a frantic Sunday of playing catch up - because a reduced load for Ouran is still quite a lot. This all, inevitably, led to a completely drained student body on Monday. All, of course, except the always energetic Host Club who seemed to have endless and envious energy.

"Our beautiful flowers are wilting!" Tamaki proclaimed dramatically after a rather lackluster club hour.

Kyoya glanced up from his laptop, "Yes... it appears our guests are tired from catching up on their homework or are anxious about not being able to."

"This cannot stand!" Tamaki pounded his hand against his fist.

Koaru and Hikaru perked up, sensing one of Tamaki's plans coming on.

"What cannot stand, Tama-chan?" Mitsukuni asked with deceptive innocence. He too was curious as to what (likely unreasonable) plan Tamaki would present them with.

"We can not allow the life to drain out of our precious princesses!" Tamaki wailed.

Haruhi rolled her eyes, "What are you talking about?" She asked, not mincing her words when dealing with Tamaki's flamboyancy, "They're just tired and stressed. They'll get over it in a few days."

Kyoya's glasses gleamed in the light as he adjusted him, "You're missing the point, Haruhi." He said, announcing another brief lecture was about to begin, "This is a prime opportunity. Our guests would be more likely to indulge in something different and fresh then they would be otherwise."

"You mean you want to capitalize on their anxiety." Haruhi deadpanned, interrupting Kyoya's lecture.

Tamaki broke in by loudly proclaiming, "If we want to raise the spirits of our lovely princesses we must show them sights that will invigorate them! Something that radiates life! Something that cannot help but lure them out of the doldrums they have fallen into!"

Koaru, Hikaru, and Mitsukuni mused on what improbable event they thought Tamaki would suggest.

"A trip to the stars," Koaru thought.

"Paris," was Hikaru's guess.

"Charle's Chocolate Factory theme day!" was Mitsukuni's, obviously slanted, guess.

Kyoya discreetly slid a pamphlet about a sakura viewing festival forward on his table. He kept these pamphlets on hand, in case of one of Tamaki's fanciful moods occurred. It allowed him to subtly steer Tamaki back into the land of human possibilities. Kyoya passed the pamphlet right under Tamaki's downturned eyes, as he tried to come up with a scheme off the top of his head.

"A flower viewing reception!" He announced, not even realizing that Kyoya had manipulated him.

Koaru, Hikaru, and Mitsukuni all exchanged a look.

"No offense boss," Koaru began.

"But that's kind of lame," Hikaru finished.

Tamaki's cheeks lit up red in agitation.

"It is not lame!" He defended passionately, "Just think about it! We could dress up in traditional or butler costumes and serve our lovely ladies tea while they admire the beautiful sakura trees! The beauty and vigor of those blossoms would surely awaken the same in our princesses!"

The twins mused before deciding in sync, "That's actually a good idea."

"What do you mean by 'actually'?!"

Haruhi nodded her head, ignoring Tamaki (who deflated comically), "Yeah, and the sakura trees are just reaching full bloom."

Hikaru rubbed his chin, "The serving tea idea is pretty good too."

"I like the idea of the butler costumes," Koaru admitted.

Mitsukuni shook his head, "No, traditional!" He voted, jumping up and down in excitement.

"Cosplay again?" Haruhi groaned though she was completely ignored.

"We can do both," Kyoya decided.

"Tamaki, Hikaru, Koaru, and myself can dress as butlers. Haruhi, Hani-senpai, and Mori-senpai can wear kimonos."

"I don't have-"

"one will be provided for you."

Haruhi breathed a sigh of relief as the burden on her wallet lessened.

"I'll just add the cost of renting one to your debt-" Haruhi groaned. "-I already have your measurements from your suit. I will have one for you by tomorrow."

"Will you really have everything ready by tomorrow?" Mitsukuni asked, surprised but also fishing for information. He knew that the gardens would have to be prepared, which meant they would be interacting with the gardening department. Mitsukuni hoped for one particular gardener.

"Yes, I'll contact Hana-san and have her send Taka-san over tomorrow morning to prepare the garden."

* * *

"How do these things always happen to me?" Was Yumi's first thought when she walked into the greenhouse Tuesday morning.

From the second Yumi crossed the threshold, Hana was marching towards her with a look in her eye that meant trouble. Yumi's first fear was that Hana was still mad about the smoking incident but Hana had a terrible memory and Yumi had washed all of her clothes (including her backpack) so that the smell wouldn't jog her memory.

"The Host Club requested you."

Yumi would have almost preferred that Hana was still mad at her. Already she felt a headache coming on and Yumi hadn't even talked to the Host Club today. In fact, Monday had been shaping up into a great day.

"Oh, don't give me that." Hana scolded, catching the look on Yumi's face, "Even if they hadn't requested you, I would have sent you. You're the only one who gets back in timely way with my money!" Hana snapped.

Hana was always in a mood but any mention of the Host Club but her in a distinctively _bad_ mood.

"And if I recall they gave you a very generous tip." Hana threw in chidingly.

"They aren't generous tips when you factor in emotional recompense." Yumi quipped.

Hana snorted.

Yumi froze.

Yumi hadn't gotten Hana to laugh but she _had_ managed to get some amount of an emotional reaction out of Hana _Watanabe_ that wasn't about plants and wasn't anger or frustration. It was official the world was ending and it was the Host Club's fault.

Despite her amusement, there was nothing Yumi could say to cajole her way out of the job. Yumi's patience shattered against the "Unmovable Wall" that was Hana Watanabe once her mind was made up about something. Yumi eventually sulked off to her assignment before Hana attempted to chase her off with a gardening spade.

Yumi headed for the Host Club but she didn't even make it to the music room before Kyoya appeared, looking incredibly out of sorts.

"What crawled into your ass and died?" Was the question that was on the tip of Yumi's tongue but she checked it. She wanted a good tip after all and Kyoya rarely appreciated humor when he was in a good mood and he was petty enough - in Yumi's estimations - to take his mood out on her tip.

"We're hosting a flower viewing reception this afternoon," Kyoya informed her, before Yumi could think of a more appropriate greeting, going straight to business without any of the social niceties such as acknowledging Yumi's existence, never mind wishing her a good morning.

Yumi went with it.

"So where are you hosting it?"

"I'll show you."

Kyoya led Yumi back the way she had come for part of the way from the green house to music room 3. Then they took a sharp left and went a way that Yumi was sure she had never seen before. Yumi wondered just how big this school was. She couldn't imagine what the AC and electricity bill must be.

The walk was silent and it was the kind of awkward silence that made Yumi jittery and almost _want_ to fill it with chatter. However, the very palpable aura of death that emitted from Kyoya cautioned Yumi just as strongly _not_ to talk.

Eventually - and none too soon - Kyoya led Yumi into one of the many walled off gardens. It was really more of a lawn then a garden. There were beautiful sakura trees lining the walk way that led from one of the numerous school exits through the lawn out into one of the many branching walk ways that ran through Ouran Academy's land.

Already there were a handful or so workers setting up tables and chairs around the garden. Yumi's nose wrinkled as the interior - or in the case _ex_ terior - designer in her railed. They were just setting them up willy-nilly with no order whatsoever. It looked, frankly, awful.

Kyoya collapsed into one of the spare chairs and Yumi was unable to tell if he was awake or not, but either way he was clearly going to be useless to her.

Yumi's head spun. Where did she even start? Then slowly the anxiety and frustration melted away as her mind began to answer her questions. A nice little list began to compile in her mind of what exactly _needed_ to be done, while a smaller list appeared alongside it with things that she _wanted_ to be done. She focused on the first list.

With a frown clearly fixed on her face, Yumi began to roll up her sleeves ready to get to business.

"I'm always cleaning up after these boys," she grumbled before addressing the workers. "Hold up!" She commanded, holding one hand up in the air to enforce her order.

The workers, to her surprise, actually did stop. Back in Karuizawa, Yumi would have just been ignored. Though she supposed these workers were probably used to taking orders from teens.

Instead of chastising them for their terrible organization skills (something that she had learned from dealing with Tamaki) Yumi announced, "Before you can set up the tables the lawn needs to be mowed and the sticks that can't be mowed need to be picked up."

Before Yumi knew it, she had the workers divided up, moving the chairs and tables out of the way while another team picked up the various fallen branches and sticks that the lawn mower couldn't handle. She had them mow, clean the walk way, and then arrange the tables and chairs in a way that was casual but flowed well and allowed the guests a good view of the trees - at least in her opinion.

One of the workers who seemed be something of the leader informed her of the budget Kyoya had given them - since Yumi wasn't going anywhere near a sleeping Kyoya to find his treasured, black book. There was enough extra in the budget for more than just lawn work. Kyoya hadn't really informed her what she was here to do. She knew lawn work was probably the majority, but the last two times she had worked with the Host Club it had to do specifically with flowers and floral arrangements. There were even flower pillars and vases. Clearly Kyoya wanted flowers but he passed out in his chair - which was really uncharacteristic of what she had seen of Kyoya so far.

Grabbing a scrap piece of paper from her pocket and borrowing a pen, Yumi jotted down to different orders for flowers. One for the table centerpieces which needed to be pretty but simple and not distracting at all. The floral arrangements for the flower pedestals needed to be a bit more showy but not enough to distract from the Sakura trees.

"Hmm... maybe more of a flowered plant then a flower arrangement," Yumi realized, crossing out that order and rewriting it. She handed the list to one of the workers, "Go to the green house -" at his look of confusion she gave him brief directions, "Find an elderly woman named Hana, and give her this. Tell her that you're requesting Sato Junko specifically for the order."

The man took her scrap of paper and bustled off to deliver the letter. Yumi watched him go. She had never thought she was much of a leader and she still didn't. This was a frantic mess of Yumi making one request then changing it a second later. Not to mention she couldn't keep a distinct tone. Sometimes her requests were timid messes and other times she was sure she sounded like a military commander. However, for her first attempt at doing anything like this, things seemed to be going well.

"How many of you know anything about tree maintenance?" Yumi' s question was returned with blank looks. She sighed. Nothing was ever easy with the Host Club.

* * *

A/N: Still updating this, I promise! Here we have the start of the second arc.

Please favorite and review! Nothing is more motivating than a review!~


	10. Cheshires' Plans

**Chapter 10**

 **Cheshires' Plans**

Kyoya had a hypothesis after seeing how Yumi had handled helping plan the ball. He hypothesized he had found a secret gem in Taka Yumi. Originally, Kyoya had only asked for Yumi because she had already seen the less professional side of the Host Club and had proven that she could keep her mouth shut. He hadn't expected her to sweep in and jump straight into things like she had. Calling in Yumi today had been to test his hypothesis. Once again Yumi had surprised Kyoya. He hadn't expected her to be so effective at organizing the workers and getting the lawn set up. The way she had quickly put togethe what needed to be done, figured out how to get it done, and had actually gotten it done had all been very impressive to Kyoya.

Her only downside seemed to be that she wasn't good at handling people. A trait Kyoya had noticed in her interactions with the Host Club. However, as Kyoya watched her interact with the workers he realized that he had (again) had made a judgement about Taka Yumi with imperfect information. Yumi handled the Host Club poorly, but it had been a rushed decision to decide that based off those interactions that she, on the whole, couldn't handle people. Yumi's difficulties were even understandable, given her very limited interaction with the Club. Haruhi seemed to have the same problem though her natural charm carried her through it. Yumi had no such charm.

Despite her difficultly with the club, Yumi handled the workers _much_ better. She had some difficulty and Kyoya wouldn't classify her as _gifted_. Kyoya was hesitant to say she was even a natural. Yumi sometimes hesitated in her orders, undercut herself, and she couldn't appear to be able to decide on a tone, often switching between very polite (which had been a surprise to Kyoya) and very stern (which was less of a surprise). But for what Yumi lacked in skill or raw intuition was whole-hearted determination. She was willing to throw herself into things, and apparently she worked very good off the cuff.

The test had gone better than expected. Kyoya was now certain he had found a gem in Taka Yumi. She knew Haruhi's secret and had proven that she would keep it. She could handle the Host Club, though whether or not she liked them remained to be seen. She had a natural eye for interior design and had the type of almost _motherly_ personality that she couldn't help but jump in when things went wrong. She ran towards trouble instead of away from it - complaining bitterly the whole time but Kyoya could work with that. She would work perfectly for his plans.

If running the Host Club had taught Kyoya anything it was that he _could_ run it on his own, but that it was difficult to do so. Yumi could prove to be a very valuable underling. All that remained was a way to secure her under his control. A task that was harder than it looked. Yumi didn't owe him anything, and if anything he owed her (which he still didn't like). Even if Kyoya had blackmail or had Yumi in his debt, it would just counteract the favor she was doing for the Host Club. Not to mention Kyoya had no idea how Yumi would react to such an attempt. She was worldly enough to see any attempt for what it was, and she had proven nothing if not that she was unpredictable.

Kyoya had yet to figure out a plan, but he was sure he would, in due time.

* * *

"Huh? Taka put this all together, huh?" the twins asked, looking at the surprisingly well put together lawn.

It wasn't surprisingly that Kyoya had put it together, what was surprising was that Yumi had a hand it. Though the twins supposed that the way she had handled the ball had proven that she was at least somewhat competent. Still, Kyoya had informed them that Yumi had handled almost everything - and Kyoya wasn't a modest man. If he said that Yumi did most of the work, then she did.

"Yu-chan's pretty good at this sort of thing, isn't she, Takashi?" Mitsukuni asked his cousin with a bright grin, happy at his friend's achievement. Although he was disappointed that he had missed her. It wasn't fair that Kyoya kept Yumi all to himself.

Takashi grunted in agreement.

"I didn't know you were one to slack off, Kyoya," Tamaki teased his friend.

"It was a test."

"A test?" Tamaki asked confused.

"Do you want Yumi-san to join the club?" Haruhi asked, quickly picking up on Kyoya's plan with alarming ease.

The topic of conversation was radically switched when the twins put something together.

"Hey," Hikaru began.

"Haruhi had lunch with Taka-senpai," Kaoru picked up.

"And so did Mori-senpai and Hani-senpai."

"And now Kyoya-senpai spent the whole morning with her."

"We want to have our own bonding time with Yumi-chan!" The twins chorused together.

They were usually loath to hang out with anyone outside of the Host Club - and even if that was a new occurrence - but if everyone else was doing it, they didn't want to be left out, especially if she was potential new member. Besides, Yumi was a very surprising person. In a lot of ways she was similar to Haruhi. Though in just as many ways, she was radically different. The twins were curious to see what made her tick - and what ticked her off. She probably was _really_ funny when she was mad.

"Since when did you two brats get permission to call her Yumi? And what's with the '-chan', she's your senpai!" Haruhi chided immediately, feeling an instinctive rush to protect the other new girl. It had been about a week since the last time she had really spoken to Yumi, but she had liked the girl - that and she wouldn't wish the twins on anyone.

The twins shrugged, not effected by Haruhi's chiding in the slightest.

"We should bring her to host club!" The twins decided more than suggested.

"Yumi-senpai has work!" Haruhi protested.

"If Kyoya-senpai can bring her here to test her out for the Host Club then I don't see why we can't bring her here."

"You selfish jerks, that's completely different!"

"What, we're saving her from work. Really, she should be thanking us."

Kyoya's glasses gleamed menacingly shutting up the bickering trio, "May I remember you that you will be _working_. I will not summon Taka-san to waste her time and offer a distraction for you and the rest of the club. If you want to do your 'bonding time' with her, track her down on your own time."

With that, the club set about getting ready for their grand appearance before their guests. Nobody noticed the wicked glance the twins shared. The more Haruhi and Kyoya told them no, the more they decided they would. Now it was just a question of getting Kyoya to summon Yumi.

* * *

Yumi wasn't sure what kami she had managed to piss off, but she fully attended to track down every shrine from Ouran Academy to Himura's bakery and offer repayment. She only hoped that nothing truly bad happened before she got a chance - and that the shrine in question wasn't back in Karuizawa.

Everything had started off fine. She had went to her afternoon shift at the greenhouse. Hana had either completely forgotten the smoking incident or had decided that working with the Host Club twice had been punishment enough. Yumi was finally off soil duty and back to cutting shrubs in one of Ouran's many gardens. It was no greenhouse duty, but everyone was competing for that work.

Yumi had thought that after the morning her escapades were done and that the rest of the day would just pass normally. It wasn't until Katsuo, one of the oldest workers in Ouran's gardening department, came bustling towards her in his strange "old-man" run - that was more like speed walking then running - that Yumi realized that she had jinxed herself. She really needed to find herself a luck charm.

Katsuo reached her out of breath forcing Yumi to spend a few agonizing minutes in total suspense as he caught his breath.

"Host Club," He rasped out, making Yumi's stomach drop - not again!

"I was working in the garden right outside where they're throwing some sort of... of-"

"- flower viewing reception," Yumi cut in, wanting to hurry the explanation. It couldn't be good, and the waiting was just making it worse.

Katsuo nodded, gulping a few greedy gasps of air down. Yumi winced, wondering if he had ran the whole way here. Her eyes narrowed at the thought, the flower reception had better be on _fire_ if they were making a man as old as Katsuo run around like a chicken without a head.

"Apparently a limb came down."

Yumi paled. She was _sure_ she had checked all of the trees for unstable branches. She had a few removed that had looked dangerous. She had to manage a lot of work in a little amount of time but Yumi was sure she was good enough with foliage by now to know when a limb was about to crack! Yumi turned positively white when she thought of what Hana's reaction would be when she found out. Yumi would be _wishing_ she was carrying heavy bags of soil when she was done with her!

"It didn't hurt anyone," Katsuo quickly reassured and Yumi had let out a sigh of relief, "It didn't fall near anybody. From what I gathered, it just scared them."

Katsuo had been working at Ouran long enough to know how the students reacted. If that's what he thought happened, Yumi trusted his judgement. She knew from just her limited experience how volatile the student body was. With morbid humor, Yumi wondered who had freaked out more, the Host Club or their guests.

"They wanted me to summon you, to check it out. I dunno why, I could have checked it for them but they didn't want to bother me." Katsuo and Yumi shared a knowing look. They both knew it was more of a bother for Katsuo to track down Yumi then it was for him to just check out the trees.

"One of them fancy you or something?" Katsuo asked with a cheeky grin. Coming to a completely different conclusion than Yumi had.

Yumi scoffed immediately at the suggestion, maybe _too_ quickly as Katsuo's cheeky grin seemed to grow larger on his wrinkled face.

"Don't be silly!" She protested.

Yumi was sure it was nothing like that. The Host Club had much better prospects with their guests before they'd bother with a _weed_ like her.

Her real theory was that they just didn't want Katsuo to ruin their "atmosphere" (or something stupid like that) and preferred Yumi since she would get in and get out with no fuss. Yumi did wonder why they had started requesting her and not somebody they could con out of money. She knew that she was a fairly good worker but Yumi did not think herself so talented as to be better than free labor.

"I'm not being silly," Katsuo rebuffed, suddenly serious, "You're a cute girl, Yumi-chan."

"Thanks, but you're way to old for me, Katsuo-senpai." Yumi drawled.

Katsuo laughed loudly, "That's what I like about you Yumi, you have a bite."

Yumi shook her head at the silly, old man and gave her goodbyes. But before she could leave, Katsuo stopped her.

"Hey, I'm not going to report you to Hana-san."

Yumi stared at Katsuo questioningly. She hadn't asked him not to. She didn't expect to put himself between Hana's wrath and herself. She wouldn't ask _anyone_ to do that for her.

"Something about this just feels... off, and I don't want you getting into trouble over nothing."

Yumi gave Katsuo a truly grateful smile and bowed her head to him. "Thank you, Katsuo-san."

When she straightened Katsuo was blushing.

"Don't do things like that girl!" he rebuffed, scratching his head. Then he turned on his heel and stormed off muttering under his breath. Yumi grinned as she watched him. Katsuo always acted funny when he was embarrassed.

Without Katsuo to distract her, Yumi headed off towards the Host Club's flower viewing reception. Though the fear of Hana's wrath was severely lessened with Katuso's promise to not say anything (though Hana usually found out about anything that happened on Ouran's gardens), Yumi still had plenty of other concerns. Kyoya was going to be shooting her dark looks the entire time and afterword he probably say something chilling cold that would destroy her self-esteem. It was his fault anyway, he could have actually helped her out when she was setting up _his_ flower reception! Yumi was _sure_ she had checked all the tree branches.

* * *

Yumi spent the whole walk to the flower reception fretting, so when she arrived there she was fully expecting something dramatic to occur. Maybe Kyoya descending on her like a vulture, the sky turning to match the mood with ominous thunderclouds. He would give some long speech that would be really about him just roasting her. He'd have his family's police investigate her past, there was enough stuff in there to have her in juvie for months. Maybe she'd get thrown out of the school all together, she had heard somewhere that Tamaki's father was on the school board. She was so dead. Of course, Yumi's life would go down this way. There was no slow decline, no clues. She was riding high and now she was crushed.

When Yumi arrived nothing even close to her dramatic fretting happened. In fact, it was almost comical how calm everything was. There was a tree branch that had fallen down, and Yumi could imagine how the girls had freaked out, but like most drama at the school it had already passed. Nobody even seemed to have notice that she had arrived.

Yumi was too relieved at the turn of events to be miffed. She headed around the crowd of tables. As she headed for the fallen limb, Yumi observed the event she had put together. All of her earlier decisions with the setup Yumi saw validated, with the exclusion of a few things that Yumi was already mentally fixing in her head for later reference.

The tree branch that came down was no where near where anyone was and Yumi was a bit surprised that any of the airheads had even _noticed_ it coming down. Calling it a branch was even being generous. Yumi wouldn't even need a saw to deal with. If she put it against the ground and exerted force she could probably snap it in half. Carrying it wouldn't even be a chore.

All of this were setting off warning bells in her head, which prompted Yumi to inspect the part of the "branch" that had been connected to the tree. Sure enough, it look like it had been sawed off with a pocket knife. The way the wood pealed up and there were nicks and cuts made that had been clearly made with a knife - wielded poorly but still.

Yumi understood that the rich people had to occupy themselves somehow and often did so by backstabbing and sabotaging each other, so at first, that was what she thought had happened. However, the part of her that had read one too many detective books while hiding in the school library, noted that if this were a form of sabotage it was made by someone stupid. This simply didn't have any impact, unless the goal was to get her in trouble with Hana. Yumi frowned at that thought, now that _was_ a plausible scenario. Yumi was on thin ice with some of the Host Club's fanclub. However, besides doing her _job_ Yumi hadn't done anything, in her mind, that ought to incite their rage. They had even expressed that as long as she was playing by the "rules" - as idiotic as that sounded - she could be around the Host Club. Yumi was fairly certain that doing her job was fair - though maybe enviable - to the twits.

Yumi was still stewing over the possibility that she had angered the Host Club's fanclub when an arm wrapped around her shoulder.

"Nice to see you _drop_ in, Yumi-senpai. Isn't it Hikaru?" Koaru asked with a snicker.

Yumi turned her head and noticed the other twin was leaning against the tree that was the "scene of the crime". Well, they wasn't obvious at all. Yumi shot Kaoru a dirty look that only caused the twins to grin more. Yumi need to work on her intimidation abilities, clearly.

"You wouldn't have anything to do with that, would you, Koaru?" Yumi asked.

"How could we have anything to do with that? Right Hikaru?" The twin Yumi thought was Hikaru answered.

"Yeah," the other twin that Yumi had _thought_ was Koaru answered, "We've been working."

Yumi's eyes narrowed at their evasion. The more they talked with her with those _smirks_ on their faces the more she was sure they had something to do with it.

"Shouldn't be working now?" Yumi asked, trying to dismiss them before they made her mad. Back in Karuizawa, Yumi might have made a scene even though she knew any scene she made would amuse the twins and make her look bad. However, Yumi had a tentative reputation and a tentative clean slate, nothing like back in Karuizawa. With something to lose, Yumi found herself much less assertive.

She shrugged one of the twin's arms of her shoulder. The twins shrugged in sync, and the one who had been manhandling her backed off. Yumi couldn't exactly read their expression but she didn't like how curious they were acting. She wanted the troublemakers bored with her, not interested.

A light seemed to go off in their minds as their grin grew until it was almost ear splitting, "Hey, Yumi you haven't ever played our game!"

"What game?" Yumi asked, immediately regretting it.

"The 'which one is Hikaru' game."

"No thanks." Yumi immediately shot down, winning perplexed looks from the twins. Apparently the girls liked the obviously rigged game.

"That's not a game, that's a challenge," Yumi informed them, a hand on her hip, "And I win challenges."

"So you won't play," one of the twins began.

"Because you know you'll lose?" The other one finished with an obnoxious smirk.

Yumi gave a nonchalant shrug that hid her growing irritation, "Nope. _When_ I play your challenge, I'll win."

Yumi didn't know why she was taking their stupid game so seriously. It really irritated her how they pretended to be each other and then seemed to want people to be able to tell them apart. Yumi found that more than a little bit hypocritical. The competitive side of Yumi also had pitched in. She hated to lose and so anything that was set up to make her lose was bound to set her off. If they wanted to play that way, fine, Yumi would play - eventually - and she would win. If she could tell Sora and Emi apart, she could learn to tell the twins apart. It would just take time - more time than it had with Sora and Emi since they had distinctly different personalities and never tried to hide it except when they were up to something.

"That sounds like a bet, Yumi-senpai." The twins chorused, looking amused, though Yumi sensed something darker under the surface. Like they found her 'bet' offensive.

Yumi felt little sympathy. If they didn't want people to win then they shouldn't issue the challenge. "Well, then you guys can think of what you want to give me when I win." She told them haughtily, glaring up at the twins that were practically looming over her.

"Yu-chan!" Mitsukuni came charging towards Yumi out of the corner of her eye. For a second, Yumi was thrown by his strange, traditional clothing, but not so thrown that she didn't dodge his glomp. Yumi ducked under his arm avoiding the hug.

"Nice to see you again, Haninozuka-senpai."

The tension that had been palatable between the twins and Yumi evaporated with the appearance of Mitsukuni. He pouted at Yumi's evasion. Yumi attempted to redirect Mitsukuni's attention before he went full "puppy-dog" mode and demanded a hug.

"Why are you dressed like that?"

"We're cosplaying!"

Yumi stared, "What?" She asked blankly. She wondered how she only just _now_ realized that the twins were dressed like butlers along with Mitsukuni's traditional clothing. Of course, the first time she had met them they had been cosplaying, so maybe she shouldn't have been so surprised.

"Shouldn't you all be entertaining our guests?" Kyoya appeared from behind Yumi.

"Thank you for coming to deal with our little issue, Taka-san. I apologize for taking you away from your work."

Yumi turned to face Kyoya. Judging from the dark look Kyoya was sending the twins and his 'apology' and noticeable lack of irritation towards her, Yumi's suspicion about the twins had been confirmed about as much as she needed them to be.

They were definitely brats who thought it would be funny to drag Yumi away from her work. If Hana found out that a branch came down, Yumi was going to be in a real trouble. Not that idiots like them ever thought about _consequences._

"No problem, Ootori-san," Yumi responded with a grin that she hoped let Kyoya know that she _knew_ what had really happened and would remember it. The look Kyoya shot the twins confirmed that he had gotten her message.

Yumi turned to go deal with the branch feeling a little self-satisfied with herself, she probably shouldn't be implying that an _Ootori_ owed her something, but on the other hand she couldn't have them taking advantage of her because she was scared of their prestige.

Club hours had been almost over by the time Yumi had hoofed it to the garden and by the time she was finished dealing with the tree limb, they were. It had been a relief as it allowed Yumi to make an innocuous escape. Or it would have, if she hadn't been almost close lined by Tamaki as she made her escape.

Yumi wasn't exactly certain what brought it on, everyone had been staring at some chart that had come out of nowhere when she had attempted to escape. Now she was trapped in Tamaki's grip, staring at a chart that had how much time Haruhi spent with Tamaki versus the twins and how much time Yumi spent with the Host Club versus just Kyoya. Yumi found the chart a bit enlightening. The Host Club were able to heighten her stress levels remarkably given how little she saw of them.

"It's not fair! Everyone else gets to spend much more time with Haruhi and Yumi-hime-"

"I'm not a princess!"

"-Then I do!"

"That's not fair boss! Kyoya-senpai gets to spend the most time with Yumi-senpai, not us!"

Tamaki then started ranting, and Yumi immediately checked out since it was nonsense and more about Haruhi then it was about her. Of course, the consequence of checking out meant then when Tamaki started to shake her back and forth demanding that she 'turn Haruhi back right now', Yumi was utterly confused.

"What the heck?! I didn't change Haruhi into anything!" Yumi denied, clearly demonstrating that she had not been paying _any_ attention. She had missed Tamaki spouting his theories about how Yumi, being a female, would be able to make Haruhi more feminine, like she had been before.

"You don't have to rush anything. Haruhi's going to be found out anyway." One of the twins pointed out.

"Remember? The day after tomorrow, we have physical exams." The other twin picked up.

For once Yumi felt gratitude towards the twins who were indirectly coming to her aid. Everyone froze. It appeared that everybody _but_ the twins had forgotten about the physical exams.

"Wait, you mean that you guys have been harassing me about knowing Haruhi's secret when the entire school is going to know in two days?" Yumi demanded incredulous at the ignorance of the entire club. Two of them _had_ known and had went along with the harassment anyway. Yumi took back any gratitude she might have felt towards the twins.

* * *

A/n: Longer chapter this time around! Please favorite and review!


	11. Dodo's March

A/N: So, we never really get an idea of what the female physical exams are like outside of them weighing them publicly. I'm going to assume they're a lot like the guys except that guys aren't allowed in to see girls with only their bras on, based on how Haruhi took off her shirt for her exam, which besides being private should have otherwise been the same.

* * *

 **Chapter Eleven**

 **Dodo's March**

The implications of the physical exam didn't hit Yumi until she was getting ready for bed that night. Not only were the exams divided by gender during the physical exam - that was the part that would expose Haruhi's secret - but there was a certain amount of the exam that was in front of people, which come to think of it would also expose Haruhi's secret. Yumi assumed that they were private enough that it would be just women and the doctors (she highly doubted these rich and protective parents would let their daughters be seen by men while just in their _bras_ ) but still the idea made her recoil.

Changing into her pajamas, Yumi's eyes trailed to the mirror which displayed the thing that she was the most embarrassed about. A very obvious and apparent scar that trailed around her hip bone up to her stomach. Back in Karuizawa her friends had teasingly called it her "failed seppuku scar". In reality, it was the result of her and her friends being idiots out in the woods and nearly getting themselves killed. They had learned the hard, and nearly disastrous, way not to ride in the bed-load's of trucks.

Time had healed the scar, somewhat, but it was still pink and puckered and would likely be that way for another year or so. Yumi had been self-conscious of the scar. She had worn bikinis after the accident without thinking twice. Granted that everyone who knew about the scar didn't make any judgements about Yumi when they saw it. Ouran would be different. Yumi didn't want anybody to ask about it. She didn't want anyone to know about it. She didn't want to explain how stupid she had been, that was in the past - where it belonged. All Yumi wanted was everything in her past to just stay there.

There just _had_ to be a way to get a private exam.

The plan was simple, so simple that Yumi felt a little silly calling it a 'plan' even in the safety of her head. Yumi had figured it out while she was eating breakfast the following more. What she needed to do was talk to a teacher about the exam. They were certain to know if there was a way to get a private exam or not. Since Yumi couldn't exactly arrive early to her school since she worked during the morning, she would have to instead wait until lunch break to get one of the few teachers Yumi liked - and felt liked her - alone so that she could ask.

* * *

To say that the first half of the day passed slowly was a huge understatement. More than once Yumi found herself impatiently tapping her nails against her desk as she willed time to go faster. Time did not yield to her. Eventually, however, the lunch bell rang and the students filed out of the classroom. Yumi hung back. Chikaho Mutou, who taught 2-B history was still at her desk, packing away her lecture notes slowly. It took a couple of seconds for Yumi to act upon the opportunity she had been waiting for all day.

Tentatively, Yumi approached Chikaho.

"Mutou-sensei?"

Chikaho looked up at Yumi with a friendly smile that did little to mask her curiously. Yumi was not very talkative with Chikaho, no matter how much she liked her as a teacher. "Ah, Taka-san. Can I help you?"

"Hai..." Yumi scratched the back of her head, finding her nerves at talking to her teacher annoying and misplaced. "I don't really know who to ask about this... ano... the physical exams are coming up -" Chikaho nodded her head to indicate that Yumi should continue, "- and I understand that they're sort of public - at least to your gender..." Yumi bit her lip nervously, "Ano...Is there a way to get a private exam?"

Yumi glanced at Chikaho - at some point during her question, Yumi's eyes had moved away from Chikaho to the chalkboard. She hoped her teacher didn't think there was anything odd or suspicious about her request. To her relief, Chikaho looked more amused then concerned.

"Ah, a little modest, Yumi-chan?" Chikaho teased. Yumi flushed and didn't confirm or deny, letting Chikaho think was her reason for her question.

"A lot of students feel the same way - or their parents do. Plenty of families have their own doctors inspect their kids during the physical exam privately."

Yumi's face fell. She couldn't afford a private doctor, even for just one exam. One of the great things about Ouran was that the physical exam was included in the tuition, allowing Yumi to avoid seeing a doctor outside of Ouran and therefore avoiding that fee.

"But," Chikaho continued, "Not every family in here can afford such things, despite what you might think Taka-san," she teased and Yumi blushed. She did tend to assume everyone at Ouran was spoiled rotten, "You can have complimentary private exams. You can get a file to fill out for the service from the nurse. The wait is a little bit longer, but I imagine that won't be a problem."

Relief washed over Yumi and she offered her teacher a small but bright grin, "No, it won't be. Thank you, Mutou-sensei."

The two exchanged their goodbyes and Yumi beelined for the nurse's office.

* * *

And like that, Yumi's problem was dealt with and she was ready for whatever the rest of the day had to throw at her. Or at least that was what Yumi thought until she found out that Host Club had yet again requested her during her work hours. This time it was just for a flower delivery. Again, there was no appeal to be made to Hana. The Host Club had finally begun to pay their fees to the gardening department, thanks to Yumi, and Hana wasn't about to let that change just because Yumi liked the state of her sanity.

Speaking of sanity, it was at an all time low at the Host Club today. When Yumi arrived with the cart of ornamental flowers for the coffee tables, Tamaki was staring into space clearly day dreaming.

Mitsukuni ran over to great her with exuberance, but was at least mindful of Yumi's cart, since he didn't launch himself at her like a speeding bullet, "Hiya, Yu-chan!" He was emitting beams of good cheer - which Yumi's imagination supplied in the way of blinding sparkles.

"Hey, Haninozuka-senpai," Yumi returned his greeting, though more sedately, "Do you know what's up with Tamaki-san?"

Mitsukuni shrugged, "He must be having a great day-dream."

"With a weird face like that?" Yumi made her own face, and the twins walked over to join their conversation, "I'd rather not think about what he's thinking about."

Mitsukuni let out a burst of surprise laugher that sounded much less sweet than his usual laughter. Yumi internally congratulated herself on surprising Mitsukuni enough that he momentarily broke character. She made it a mental goal to try to do that more often.

"Yeah, he's kind of creeping me out," twin one agreed, slinging his arm around Yumi's shoulder. Yumi, who had resolved to figure out the difference between the twins, noted that this twin's voice was on the softer side.

"Envious, Hikaru?" Suddenly Tamaki was nose to nose with the four of them. Yumi reeled back, red roses exploding behind Tamaki in her mind's eye. Tamaki's fanciful daydreaming was apparently contagious.

"This is all part of my strategy," Tamaki pronounced, "While you have wasted time blinded by your jealousy, I have foreseen the outcome of this charade." The other host members, excluding Haruhi who appeared to be late, joined in to see what nonsense Tamaki was spewing _this_ time.

"This anime is obviously a romantic school comedy!" Tamaki announced.

Yumi's fanciful side disagreed. If their life was something other than actual life then it was some sort of weird crack fanfiction. Yumi refused to believe that her life could have taken such a dramatic fall down the rabbit hole without the aid of some malevolent and _ridiculous_ aid.

"Haruhi and I are the main characters," Tamaki continued, "So that means we're love interests."

"Yeah, then what are we?" The twins asked, seemingly stupefied by this turn of events.

"You boys are the homosexual supporting cast!" Tamaki announced pointing to them accusingly, "So please don't step across this line!"

Then, before Yumi could react, she was pulled over to 'Tamaki's' side" of the the room. He twirled her into a half dip that disoriented Yumi more than anything. "And Yumi-hime is apart of our token love triangle! I'm sorry to have to break your heart, Yumi-hime!"

Halfway through his dramatics, Tamaki dropped Yumi (though he seemed unaware that he done so). Yumi dropped to the ground, barely catching her fall with her hands.

"Wah! Don't break Yu-chan's heart!"

Yumi gave Tamaki an unamused look, "Not even in the worst crack fanfiction," she announced, huffing as she got to her feet. This was getting too silly, to even be amusing, especially with Tamaki announcing that she had feelings for him. "You aren't even sort of my type."

The twins broke in, saving Tamaki before Yumi could send Tamaki reeling to his sad corner.

"Boss, I don't think you get it."

"If word gets out that Haru-chan is really a girl then she won't be able to be in the Host Club anymore." Mitsukuni pointed out innocently, though Yumi was pretty sure there was a bit of a gleam in his eye.

Tamaki froze.

Yumi stared, "You honestly didn't put that together, baka?" She asked incredulous, not caring if she was being rude to her technical employer, "What, is there a lesbian population big enough to support an outed female host?"

"Plus, I bet if Haru-chan started wearing girl clothes she'd be even _cuter_ than she is now!" Mitsukuni continued, making Yumi positive he was taking some sort of malicious glee out of pointing out Tamaki's foolishness. Yumi approved.

"She did dress as a regular girl when she was in middle school, right?" one of the twins mused. His voice was a bit deeper, so Yumi guess it was Koaru. "She must have been pretty popular with all the boys."

"Yeah," Kyoya agreed, for once joining in on the Tamaki torture. "According to my investigative report-" seriously Yumi couldn't understand how Kyoya hadn't been reported for stalking by now, "-someone would declare their undying love for her _at least_ once a month."

"Seriously?" Yumi asked, though nobody was really paying her any attention. Haruhi was cute as a boy but not undying love once a month cute. Yumi couldn't imagine the difference as a girl was that great that Haruhi would be some sort of heart-breaking goddess of beauty. And honestly, Yumi was confused how the word hadn't gotten around that Haruhi wasn't interested in dating.

"Oh, I see," one of the twins began, clearly gearing up for the final punch, "So the boss wouldn't even be able to get close to her."

"But we'd be able to," the other twin- Koaru, Yumi figured - continued, "Because we're in class with her all day long."

"No way..." Tamaki let out a choked cry. Yumi wondered if the Host Club had managed to break their 'boss'.

"Hey, guys! Sorry I'm so late!"

Yumi winced. Haruhi had the _worst_ timing.

Tamaki pounced on the crossdressing girl in an instant, grabbing Haruhi by the shoulders.

"Don't you worry about a thing, Haruhi!" Tamaki pronounced, "We're determined to keep your secret. No one will figure out you're a girl during tomorrow's physical exams. So please! Promise you'll stay our secret, little princess!"

Yumi was pretty sure Tamaki was inches from tears. She couldn't determine if he liked Haruhi that much or if he was that flamboyant. It really could go either way at this point.

Haruhi blinked at him before finally agreeing with a lackluster and confused, "Sure." Probably born out of wanting to escape more than anything. Yumi didn't blame her.

"You know what?" One of the twins said, "I think of all us would be a little peeved if we had to watch other guys flirt with her."

"Then that settles it!" The other twin agreed.

Yumi rolled her eyes. Apparently everyone in this club had a crush on her. Maybe Tamaki was right and Haruhi was the protagonist of this 'anime'. That peeved Yumi a bit. She shouldn't be the supporting character in her own life. Though that said, Yumi thought that she would make a pretty poor main character. Haruhi was a better choice in that regard.

After that, Yumi checked out. The whole club seemed to be coming up with an elaborate plot to protect Haruhi's identity when there was a very simple and straight forward solution that she had found for herself just that morning. Yumi shot Kyoya a look from over Mitsukuni's head. Kyoya apparently sensed her eyes because he actually looked up from his book. Meeting her eyes, Kyoya gave her a little smile that was honestly much more creepy than his obviously fake smile that he had during the Host Club hours. Kyoya definitely had a plan but was letting Tamaki tire himself out, which Yumi understood. Tamaki wanted to blow everything out of proportion. It was better to let him have his fun and stay out of the way of the real plan so he couldn't mess it up.

Yumi left the club to their pointless plotting while she got to setting up the room for host hours. Her plan to exclude herself from the nonsense didn't last long. The twins practically pounced on her a few minutes later.

"Yu-senpai! You have to motivate Haruhi!"

"Why would I do that?" She asked. She hadn't been paying attention but she could guess where things had went, "If Haruhi doesn't want to be a part of the club, I don't see what that has to do with me. It's not like I'm a club member."

"Do you think they'd accept me in the gardening department?" Haruhi asked.

Yumi shrugged, "Dunno. You'd have to ask Hana if she'd sponsor your debt. Hana handles that sort of money just from dealing with the Host Club though, it wouldn't be a lot to her. If you're any good in a garden or willing to learn, you might be able to convince her," Yumi informed her. Honestly, Haruhi was an ideal co-worker.

The twins let out choked cry, "Saboteur!" They pointed accusingly at Yumi, "You want to steal Yumi away from us!"

One of the twins pulled at Yumi's ponytail. She slapped his hand away.

"I didn't make the physical exam, you know," was Yumi's lackluster defense as she continued about her work.

Even without Yumi's aid - and in fact the opposite of aid, the Host Club managed to win over Haruhi with fancy tuna of all things. There went nice, quiet gardening work with Haruhi. Though that said, the Host Club would have probably just requested her more often then they already did just to get at Haruhi so maybe it was for the best.

* * *

A/N: Yeah, sorry about this dryish chapter. We drop a little bit into the world of straight up canon scenes here, which can be a boring read.

If you're curious about the name of the chapter, the 'Dodo's March' is a reference to futile actions taken. The Dodo has the animals walk around in a circle to dry off but as they walk the waves just come up the beach and gets them wet again but they continue to march without moving up the bank to escape the waves.


	12. A Rabbit Glove

A/N: Trying a new format style! Hope you like it!

* * *

 **Arc Two: The Clever Alice and the Physical Exams**

 **Chapter Four: A Rabbit Glove**

The Host Club might have been stressed about the physical exams, but Yumi wasn't. The solution to their problem was very simple, and despite the fact that Host Club - on the aggregate - was unable to think of that solution, Yumi had faith that Kyoya would figure it out.

Yumi had spent the last few days stressing about the physical exams and now that they were upon her, Yumi _wasn't_ worried. She had no reason to be, she had all the information she needed and had filled out and filed the necessary paperwork. There was literally nothing that could go wrong - a thought that was dangerous to think when the Host Club was involved but Yumi was in such high spirits that she didn't even notice the thought.

It was a nice day and she had nothing to worry about. For once Yumi was walking Sora and Emi to school without a serious care in the world.

"It's getting warmer, ne, onee-san?" Emi asked, looking up at the taller girl.

Yumi nodded her head in agreement. It was. Yumi had taken to rolling up the pants of her overalls while working in the garden, and she had switched from dress pants to her old school uniform.

"The pools should be opening up soon, shouldn't they?" Emi asked.

Sora perked up at that. The twins had learned how to swim shortly before the pools had closed the previous year, which meant they hadn't gotten a real chance to swim since they had finished swimming lessons. Ever since school had started up their most frequent question was asking when the community pool would open up.

"Ne, Yuyu!" Sora wheedled, looping her arm through Yumi's free arm, "You'll take us this Saturday, won't you?" She simpered, flashing her the famous 'Himura Twins' Puppy Dog Pout'.

Vaguely Yumi noted that if Sora, Emi, and Mitsukuni combined forces they could take over the world.

Yumi hesitated at the question, "I don't know Sora-chan," she said, trying to curb the young girl's enthusiasm, "I have to work Saturday morning."

"But you'll be back long before the pool closes!" Sora complained.

Yumi nodded, "I would be, but I'll be tired. We'll just have to see how I feel. No promises."

"That's not a no!" Sora cheered. Emi grinned triumphantly as well.

Yumi smiled and shook her head. There was no getting Sora down. Hopefully Saturday would be a lighter load. She would hate to let Sora and Emi down. They both seemed to perk up at the idea of going to the pool with her.

Yumi saw the twins off. They rushed into the school, catching up with a boy who Yumi recognized from the other times she had dropped the twins off. The poor boy seemed to pale at the approaching twins who all but tackled the poor boy before dragging him inside. Yumi pitied the boy. The Himura twins were like a whirlwind.

With the twins seen off, Yumi mounted her bike and headed off towards Ouran. Stopping at a crosswalk while she waited for the light to turn, Yumi noticed a worker opening a swim suit boutique for the day. Her mind flashed to her half-promise to the twins. Yumi still didn't know if she would be able to keep the promise but she ought to be prepared in case she could. All she had back at the house was a bikini and there was no way she was wearing that to the community pool. Yumi checked her watch. She could spare a little time without being late.

A few minutes later, Yumi was peddling towards Ouran, her book bag a bit heavier and her wallet a bit lighter. Usually Yumi felt bad after making any sort of purchase but this one left Yumi feeling a bit more cheerful then before. The boutique had quiet a few one-piece swimsuits and most of them were cute. Yumi had settled on a green swimsuit with abstract designs and a slightly unusual cut to it. Cute and modest - nothing like what she would have worn back in Karuizawa.

* * *

It didn't take long for Yumi to get to Ouran Academy, and the first half of her day passed without much incidences. The Host Club didn't call for her during her morning work hours, and class went by smoothly. It wasn't until lunch that anything remarkable happened.

Yumi had been sitting underneath her favored tree, eating the lunch Tamiko had prepared for her when the hoards descended upon her - that is, the Host Club, short a Haruhi showed up.

"There you are, Yu-chan!" Mitsukuni greeted her first, throwing his arms around Yumi and half-glomping her from behind. Yumi almost choked on her bento in surprise.

"Haninozuka-senpai?!" She wheezed, trying to dislodge some rice that had gone down her windpipe.

Of course, Mitsukuni wasn't alone. He was flanked by Takashi, as usual, but also the rest of the male members of the Host Club. Yumi began to panic. If anyone spotted them - and how could they not, the Host Club didn't exactly blend in - she was bound to get into trouble with their rabid fangirls. Yumi wasn't exactly intimidated by the silly little hens, but if they started something it would be hard for Yumi to resist _finishing_ it, which would just get her into more trouble.

"Ah, lovely princess! I hope you don't mind us joining you for lunch." Tamaki said with flourish as he sat down across from her.

Honestly, Yumi was surprised someone like Tamaki would sit on _grass_.

"Well, you're already sitting down..." Yumi groused. The damage was done. There was no way she could send the Host Club away without them wondering why, and a curious Host Club was a dangerous thing Yumi suspected.

"Excellent!" The twins cheered, plopping down on the ground with little grace.

"Yu-chan?" Mitsukuni asked, sitting down beside Yumi, with Takashi sitting on his other side, "Why are you sitting out here instead of in the cafeteria?"

Yumi tugged on a loose strand of her hair, "I prefer to sit outside." She evaded, "Not that I don't enjoy your company or anything, but why are you guys out here?" Yumi asked, half because she was curious and half because she wanted to ensure Mitsukuni couldn't ask her anymore questions. He was way too perceptive.

"We still haven't come up with a plan to protect Haruhi!" Tamaki exclaimed dramatically.

"I guess that explains why Haruhi isn't here..." Yumi mused under her breath.

"Haruhi wanted to stay and study for a test tomorrow," the twins explained.

"Yes, we have to figure out some way to protect Haruhi! We have promised to protect her!" Tamaki wailed.

Yumi arched an eyebrow, her eyes sliding over to Kyoya. She doubted _he_ didn't have everything set up. The only question was why he hadn't told everyone else.

A sly smile pulled at Yumi's head that she had to duck to hide. If Yumi wasn't horribly mistaken, Kyoya was pulling a trick on Tamaki, probably revenge for yesterday. Yumi was in. She was _so_ in. In fact, she would do Kyoya one better.

"That is a predicament, isn't it?" Yumi asked slyly. "I don't see _how_ you get around Yumi's gender... unless..." Yumi trailed off, lowering her eyes while she played with her bento.

Through her eyelashes Yumi could see that she had Tamaki enthralled and the rest of the club mischievously curious. Even Kyoya had stopped scratching at his black book to listen to what Yumi would say next. Yumi had never thought her drama lessons and the daily practice of lying to protect her rowdy group home friends from trouble would come in handy in Tokyo.

"Unless what, Yumi-hime."

Yumi winced at the honorific and had to restrain herself from snapping at him not to call her that. Instead she kept up her facade, "Oh, its nothing," she waved off, only growing Tamaki's desire to have her voice her thoughts, "It was just a foolish thought. It's such a shame that someone couldn't just take her place." Yumi shrugged and popped a bit of sushi in her mouth and waited to see if Tamaki would take the bait. It was ridiculous, even by Tamaki's standards, but Tamaki had proven that he was blind to the point of foolishness when it came to Haruhi.

"That's exactly it, Yumi-hime!"

Yumi ignored the annoying honorific and feigned ignorance, "Exactly what, Tamaki-san?"

" _I_ will just take Haruhi's place!"

Yumi widened her eyes, "I don't know Tamaki-san..." She protested weakly, knowing that it would only cement the idea in Tamaki's head.

Tamaki turned to the twins, "Kaoru, Hikaru! You think it'll work won't you?"

There was a silence at their little gathering as the Host Club was simultaneously impressed by Yumi's manipulation (and a bit intimidated by her vindictiveness) and disappointed in their boss.

The twins recovered quickly, "Yeah boss, sounds great! No one will even notice!"

"I don't know..." Yumi murmured, knowing that Tamaki would remember her (weak) attempt to dissuade him and the twins agreement.

At the end of the day, he would blame them not her. Or at least, that was Yumi's intention. She didn't know Tamaki well enough to know if it would work completely, but she had a lot of practice avoiding blame back in Karuizawa.

Yumi considered this double revenge. One for Tamaki calling her a part of his 'love triangle' - as if she'd ever allow herself to be the _other woman_! And the second on the part of the twins for getting her in trouble with Hana. Hana _had_ found out about the tree limb incident and Yumi had spent the whole morning in the trees removing limbs - and that would continue until Hana was satisfied that Yumi knew how to identify dangerous limbs. Yumi already knew how to, but Hana was vindictive and who knew how long the punishment would last!

Nobody else tried to dissuade Tamaki. Apparently they all held a similar grudge for being called the "homosexual supporting cast".

Now Yumi wasn't just not dreading the physical exams. She was looking forward to them.

* * *

After lunch, it was time for the physical exams. Yumi had to separate from the Host Club, most for the sake of surviving their fangirls, though Yumi played it off as simply returning her lunch box to her classroom. Since she was the only one in 2-B, there was nothing the Host Club could do about it. They didn't even seem to notice that Yumi seemed anxious to slip away, or at least, Yumi didn't _think_ they were.

Since Yumi went with her own class to the physical exams instead of the Host Club, there was nobody around to capture evidence of her reaction to the whole affair. Ever since Yumi had begun attending Ouran Academy she had seen some ridiculous things. This, by far, took the cake. It took the cake and ate it too. They were physical exams, and yet they were being treated like - well Yumi didn't exactly know what, but a side show at a circus felt like a good comparison.

Yumi was directed to the line for private examinations, which was a short line but longer than she had thought it would be. Judging by how slowly the line was filling up, Yumi decided she could risk slipping off to go see the fruits of her efforts at lunch. If Tamaki was about to do something as ridiculous as he had proposed at lunch, Yumi wanted to see it. Hearing about it after the fact just wouldn't do her hard work justice.

Apparently other members of the Host Club had the same idea, because before Yumi could turn to go find Tamaki and the others, Mitsukuni and Takashi swooped in out of nowhere.

"Come this way, young lady!"

Yumi stared, trying to figure out why they were dressed as doctors. The disguise was not only unnecessary but also comically bad.

"I don't think so, ishi-sensei(1)," Yumi protested, playing along with their act, "I'm pretty sure this is the line I'm supposed to be in."

Mitsukuni slid his glasses down his nose, revealing his large, brown eyes, as if was supposed to be a surprising reveal, "Yu-chan, it's us, come on," he whispered.

Yumi rubbed the bridge of her nose, pretending to be exasperated while hiding her smile, "Whatever you say, _ishi-sensei_."

Mitsukuni grinned at Yumi for led the way to where the others were. Yumi spotted Haruhi and Kyoya in the crowd. Haruhi spotted her and gave her a little wave, which Yumi returned - though she was sure this was going to get her into trouble later with the rabid fangirls as well.

"Hello, Yumi-san," Haruhi greeted.

"These exams sure are ridiculous, aren't they?" Yumi asked, relieved that there was someone she could complain to.

Haruhi nodded her head and rolled her eyes, "No class difference," she scoffed.

Yumi choked on a laugh, "Did they really say that?" She asked.

Kyoya looked between the two girls curiously, "Is this not how physical exams are done in public schools?"

Yumi and Haruhi exchanged a look of disbelief before both bursting into laughter at the same time. After they recovered from their laughter fit, Haruhi noticed Takashi and Mitsukuni. The third years were awkwardly watching on while trying to blend in. They were not succeeding, and had in fact gathered a small crowd of fawning. Hopefully the sight of the cosplay Host members would distract the fangirls from noticing Yumi talking to both Haruhi and Kyoya.

"Those two are so obvious..." Haruhi deadpanned.

"Who are you talking about?" Yumi teased, still pretending that the costume was working.

Haruhi gave Yumi an unamused look which Yumi responded to with a cheeky smile. Yumi was in a good mood today, and it was coming out in her personality.

"I have those two for backup," Kyoya explained, "just in case something happens."

"But why are they in doctor disguises?" Haruhi asked.

"They're just helping to set the mood. Disguises make our operation feel like a real espionage mission."

Yumi nearly face palmed. In other words, they were only dressed up like that because they _wanted to_. Haruhi seemed likewise unimpressed.

The Host Club, plus Yumi, continued to walk down the hall to where Haruhi was supposed to be going. Not that they could get through the crowd when it was time for the Hiitachin twins' examination. They were _supposed_ to go behind a screen and undress. Instead they stripped their shirts off in front of the whole school. The fangirls went wild and Yumi's ears began to ache.

Yumi watched the whole scene feeling, and masking, minor disgust. Kyoya watched her reaction with mild amusement, "Devil type, not your type?" He asked, quirking an eyebrow.

Yumi rolled her eyes, "I just don't see how they can get worked up over seeing guys shirtless," she scoffed.

Kyoya smiled into his hand, "Have you seen a lot of shirtless men?" He asked.

The implication went right over Yumi's head, not because she was innocent but because she didn't see anything intimate about it. She didn't notice how Mitsukuni seemed to drift closer to Kyoya and herself to overhear the conversation.

"During gym class and at the swimming pool? Yeah." She scoffed. "It's just a shirt, so what?"

She could have also included that she had lived in a group home with several boys so she had seen her fair amount of shirtless boys just from that. Kyoya probably already knew that, however, and Yumi wasn't going to say anything that might get others asking questions.

Kyoya arched his eyebrows at her blunt opinion. Yumi certainly had different sensibilities than the well-bred girls Kyoya bumped elbows with. It fair to say that her sensibilities were probably vastly different from even Haruhi's, though the girls seemed very similar in how they saw the world for the most part. Looking at it from Yumi's perspective, Kyoya could see how she would be so unaffected and unimpressed - but she wasn't the Host Club's target audience (even if Tamaki believed that the Host Club was for _all_ women). It did make her useful though. Kyoya didn't have to worry about her fainting over their antics. Hana, in fact, relied on that little facet of Yumi's character to get her money - which was troublesome but at least Yumi was far more productive then any of Hana's other workers so it actually came up in the Host Club's favor.

When the twins practically threw Haruhi into the changing station, Yumi seemed to perk up with anticipation. Kyoya shot the shorter girl a look of amusement, "Ready to see the fruits of your labor?" He asked.

Yumi's eyes flickered up his and she flashed him a v-sign.

"You are rather vindictive, Taka-san."

Yumi just grinned, "Well apparently I'm a part of a love triangle. You know how that gets. Constantly pulling tricks to separate the main characters," she simpered with a devilish grin.

Kyoya chuckled.

Tamaki came through the curtains in a wig that did look a lot like Haruhi's hair. However, no wig was going to sell that deception. Yumi did everything in her power not to laugh out loud, splaying her fingers over her mouth, and leaning into Mitsukuni who had somehow come between her and Kyoya during the commotion.

The twins made no such effort. They burst out laughing and Tamaki launched at them, all his fury for the trick coming down on them - just like Yumi's plan. "You jerks!" He seethed, "You said no of the girls would be able to tell the difference!"

"It's pay back for calling us the homosexual supporting cast!" The twin in his grip hissed, his grin not lessening an inch.

And with that, Yumi's work here was done. Tamaki had horribly embarrassed himself publicly. The twins were getting choked out. All in all, a good day's work. Yumi slipped off Mitsukuni's shoulder, who didn't seem to notice, even though she had been using him as support as she struggled not to laugh out loud, then slipped into the crowd of girls.

* * *

The line for the private exam was no longer then it had been before. It appeared most of the girls had gone to watch the Host Club, since most of the people in the line were boys.

"Ah, Yumi-san," Izuru, a boy from 2-B, greeted her as she got back in line, "I was wondering where you went off to. What did those doctor's need?"

Yumi stared blankly, wondering how Izuru could be so gullible, "Nothing, they had the wrong girl," Yumi lied, deciding that was easier than explaining.

"Oh, well that's a bummer. You can have your spot back in front of me, then."

Yumi flushed, "Oh, no I couldn't." Feeling guilty that she was benefiting from her lie.

"I insist," Izuru was practically ushering her in front of him. To avoid making a scene, Yumi had no choice but to take his offer, however guilty it made her feel.

"Thank you..." Yumi mumbled.

"It's no problem," Izuru shrugged. He gave her a bashful smile, "You look cute in your school uniform, Yumi-san," He complimented, before quickly looking down at his shoes.

Yumi blushed, "Thank you," she mumbled again, pushing a few locks that had escaped her side ponytail behind her ear.

Nobody had commented on the fact that she had switched from wearing dress pants to her old school uniform, which Yumi had always thought was sort of cute - besides a few snide remarks from some snotty girls. It was nice to feel validated.

"Ha, ha. No problem," Izuru rubbed the back of his head.

"Next."

"Well, that's me," Yumi said with a wave, "I'll see you later, Izuru-san."

Yumi headed off with the nurse into one of the private examination rooms. For all Ouran's showmanship, the physical exams went like most others. Yumi's was a little bit more thorough. Suspiciously so, as if they knew she was using this instead of going to the doctor for a check up. There was no way for them to know that, unless they were in Kyoya's family pocket and Kyoya was keeping _that_ close tabs on her.

Yumi began to remove her shirt for the part of the examination that required it, when she heard heavy footfalls. Her shirt was off when the Host Club suddenly burst dramatically through the curtains.

"Haruhi!" Tamaki cried urgently.

The whole Host Club, Yumi, and Doctor Ogawa froze.

"W-what are you students doing in here?!" Doctor Ogawa unfroze first.

Yumi turned as pink as the school's paint job when she realized the Host Club was staring at her half-undressed body.

"What are you bakas doing?!" She demanded, curling one arm around her midsection instead of over her chest.

She picked up the clipboard that Doctor Ogawa had dropped on the examination table and flung it at Tamaki who was unluckily for him in front. Luckily, he managed to dodge.

"S-sorry, Yumi-hime!" Tamaki cried, covering both his eyes.

"YOU BETTER HAVE A _GREAT_ EXPLANATION FOR THIS!"

* * *

A/N: If you're curious about the title, it's a reference to when the White Rabbit goes back to his house and finds an enlarged Alice trapped in his house. Basically, it's about a simple decision causing things to spiral out of control - and walking in on people in uncomfortable situations. ;)

Sorry to end on a cliff hanger! (not really though, suffer!)

Please review! Reviews are the motivation for quicker updates~


	13. High Card

A/N: Faster update because I reached 100 follows! Y'all are the best!

* * *

 **Arc Two: The Clever Alice and the Physical Exams**

 **Chapter Five: High Card**

"-And that's what happened. We're sorry for peeking on you, Yu-chan!" Mitsukuni explained, his voice wavering with tears.

Yumi would have given the boy credit for sounding adequately sorry, if he didn't keep almost turning around while he explained (Tamaki was still in too much shock from the clipboard that had 'nearly decaptiated him' to move or explain- the twins had to turn him around). Takashi kept catching the smaller boy's head and turning it back before Mitsukuni could turn completely around and catch an eyeful.

"Quit peeking, perv!" Yumi accused. "Or there's another clip board with your name on it!" His cute act might work on all the other girls, but Yumi knew he was a functioning teenager not the little kid he pretended to be. She didn't care how cute or compelling his puppy-dog eyes were, if he turned around fully one more time she'd find something heavy to throw then just a clip board.

Yumi hastily pulled on her sweater vest, not bothering to re-button all of her button up that she had thrown back on.

"Alright," Yumi announced looking silly, but covered. Her stomach was showing a bit since her sweater vest was a little tight and her shirt underneath was unbuttoned, but the boys would just have to deal.

The Host Club turned and gave her a confused look.

"Let's go save Haruhi!" Yumi reminded them and ran out of the examination room.

The Host Club followed after her and then took the lead since Yumi didn't know which way to go (not that the Host Club seemed to either).

Sure, Yumi was giving up her place in line and would have to wait all over again - and would probably be late to work which would get an already angry Hana even angrier, but Haruhi was in trouble so Yumi didn't even think about it. And while she was embarrassed (read: mortified) that the Host Club had walked in on her undressed, it had been an accident made with the best intentions. So no, she wasn't going to kill them. If they made a habit of it though, all bets were off.

Tamaki's long legs allowed him to get inside the examination room first and he sent the pervert doctor crashing into the walls. Yumi was right on heels. She was shorter but surprisingly quick. She threw herself in front of Haruhi, spreading her arms wide, providing adequate cover and protection for the undressed girl.

The twins jumped protectively in front of the two of them, which really rather defeated Yumi's own movements. Yumi noticed the aura in the room changing, which could only mean one thing, the Host Club was going to make this weird.

"One," the twins said in sync, their voice serious, "Looks that attract the public eye."

Yumi sweat dropped, wondering just what they thought they were doing.

Kyoya, who was in the shadowy part of the room, put his foot down in force, "Two, more wealth that you can imagine."

Yumi almost face palmed. Kyoya was playing along as well, apparently. Yumi had the uncomfortable suspicion that this was probably rehearsed.

"Three chivalry that will never be able to overlook-" Takashi said, talking more than Yumi had heard him talk all week.

"-the hideousness of this world," Mitsukuni finished, sounding more serious than Yumi had ever heard him.

Yumi had to admit the rest of them sounded foolish but Mitsukuni actually sounded pretty cool.

Tamaki plopped his shirt down on Haruhi's head and took a stance in front of them. Apparently the whole host club was posing in front of the girls. There was no question this wasn't rehearsed.

"That's what makes up the Ouran Host Club!" Tamaki announced. Yumi guessed as the 'king', he got to deliver the final solo line.

Then all in sync, "We're here! Watch out!"

At that, Yumi did actually face palm. So much for looking cool. They sounded like they were sailor scouts or something equally as corny and childish. Of course, for however unimpressed Yumi was, the pervert doctor was intimidated.

"Please don't hurt me!" The ragged man kowtowed, "Spare me my life?"

"...seriously...?" Yumi murmured. The rich kids could get away with a lot, but Yumi doubted murder was one of those things, even if the police were basically in Kyoya's pocket.

But apparently the pervert doctor was not a pervert doctor. He was just looking for his daughter. That said, he was a mess. Yumi made a face. The Host Club - well, really only Tamaki and maybe Haruhi - seemed to feel sorry for the guy. Yumi didn't. Yumi didn't feel sorry for him _at all._ He hadn't just wrecked his own life, he had wrecked his family's life. Yumi didn't care if he felt _sorry_ about it. The man clearly hadn't changed. He was sorry that his family had given up on him not that he had screwed everything up in the first place. Yumi's hands curled up into fists in the fabric of her skirt wrinkling the fabric. He didn't deserve a second chance or anything from his family. He had _no_ right to ask for it.

Yumi honestly couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't listen to him blathering on like she should care about _him_ instead of his poor wife and daughter that were now living at their grandparents'. Haruhi was fine, there was no perfect doctor creeping on her, and Yumi had her own examination to finish. If she listened to anymore of this she was going to go off on the guy and the look of sympathy on Tamaki's face was actually making her feel physically ill. Yumi spun on her heel and practically stormed out of the area.

She was out of the room before she noticed she had been followed.

"Yu-chan?" Mitsukuni asked hesitantly.

Yumi froze.

"You alright?" He asked, "Where are you going?"

"Just back to my examination," Yumi played off, her fingers still knotted tight in the fabric of her skirt, "Haruhi's fine and I don't want to be late to work."

"Oh, alright..." Mitsukuni mumbled, "You sure you're not mad or anything?" He asked, "You didn't look so good back in there."

Yumi mentally cursed how perceptive the teen was - or maybe how obvious she had been.

She turned her head and gave Mitsukuni a fake smile over her shoulder, "What could I be mad about?" She asked him, before walking off.

* * *

Yumi returned to the line and was surprised to see Izuru still waiting.

"Izuru-san? Why are you still here?"

Izuru spun on his heel, "Yumi-san!" He grasped the surprised girl by her shoulders, "Are you alright? There was this big commotion about a pervert doctor and then you disappeared - _what happened to your clothes_?!"

In her cooling rage, Yumi had forgotten to duck into a bathroom to fix her appearance. Out of context, it did look pretty bad. Yumi scrambled to think of an explanation that would alleviate Izuru's concerns without giving away the Host Club or Haruhi.

"That guy didn't do anything to you did he?!"

"What, no, don't be silly!" Yumi denied, looking appalled at the suggestion.

"I'm not being silly! Are you hurt anywhere? Your shirt is completely unbuttoned!"

"Calm down, Izuru-san," Yumi soothed, pushing the teen's hands off her shoulders and putting her own on his. "Nothing happened."

Having little alternative, Yumi explained what had happened to the best of her ability - excluding the part where Haruhi was a girl getting private exams. Perverts could target teen boys as well as girls after all.

"You're that close with the Host Club?"

"I work for the gardening department," Yumi explained, "You know how they like their flowers."

Izuru nodded his head. Everyone did. It was impossible not to.

"I guess they've gotten a little attached." Yumi admitted sheepishly.

"Sounds like a headache."

"It is."

"They still shouldn't have burst in on you like that."

"They thought they were saving me."

"And I guess it would be just like you to run off and save somebody else," Izuru laughed.

Yumi blushed. Izuru made her sound like a hero instead of someone without a sense of danger.

"Did you really wait here for me?"

"Yeah, I got worried," Izuru admitted sheepishly. "I shouldn't have. You can clearly handle yourself," he laughed.

"Yeah, I can," Yumi agreed and elbowed Izuru in the side, "Still, it was a nice thought."

Izuru flushed and stumbled back, "Y-yeah," he agreed, "Well I'd better get going. My driver is waiting for me. I'll see you around, Yumi-san."

Izuru left and Yumi was eventually called into her examination.

* * *

Yumi's examination went uninterrupted this time. She was one of the last ones to go, and she was definitely going to be late to work. Of course, after the physical examination, when the doctor stopped her to ask the 'personal questions' that most check ups started with, Yumi realized she was going to be _really_ late.

"How are thing at home?"

"Fine."

"You're living with a baker and her family, aren't you?"

"Yes. I'm emancipated," Yumi was quick to point out.

"Yes, that happened this year, didn't it?"

Yumi nodded.

"When you moved out of a group home to Tokyo."

Yumi nodded again even though it wasn't a question.

"You had problems with your father showing up at the group home. There's a restraining order filed again him."

Yumi shrugged, "He was deemed an unfit parent when I was seven. He was convicted on a bunch of charges, but after he got out he tracked me down, regardless of the court issued restraining order."

"You have no interest in having anything to do with your father?"

Yumi sneered at the floor at the thought of her father, "No. I don't want anything to do with him. He's selfish. He just pretends to be this nice guy, but he just uses people. He always says he's sorry, but he's not."

Yumi didn't realize how talkative she was being about something that was private - that she hadn't spoken about with anybody but the group home kids who _knew_ because they saw her father show up on numerous occasions.

"Did he abuse you?"

Yumi froze. "What is there something on file that says he did?" She demanded.

"No."

Yumi frowned, wondering why this doctor was asking something like when her file was right there. "He didn't. He was a bad parent and an asshole -" the doctor flinched at her language "-but he never touched me."

"There's other types of abuse other than physical."

Yumi gaze the doctor a look. She was done talking about her father to a total stranger. She had seen enough therapists when she was a kid, that part of her life was over.

The doctor proceeded to ask her a bunch of other questions. Did she drink? No. (read: not anymore) Did she smoke? She was quitting. Had she ever had sex? No. Had she ever done drugs? No (read: yes, but once or twice was enough for her to know that it wasn't something she wanted to do again).

Yumi bent the truth. Even if this was a doctor he worked for the school. They weren't supposed to tell, but Yumi knew that loyalties to an abstract concept usually bent when applied to the threat of losing a job. The invasive questions also put Yumi on edge. It felt like the doctor was digging, why and what end Yumi couldn't guess, but she wasn't going to make things easy. Still, she was honest when she could be and even admitted to smoking because Yumi knew there were health risks to smoking and she didn't want them to get overlooked because her file said she didn't smoke.

* * *

Yumi exited the examination room feeling much less angry then she had going into it. Partly because of her short conversation with Izuru, and party because she had simply had time to cool down. The growing dread of Hana's wrath also played a part in substituting Yumi's anger.

Exiting the examination room, Yumi bumped into a broad chest. She stumbled back and was about to apologize when she realized who it was. Tamaki and Kyoya had been waiting for her.

"Tamaki-san? Kyoya-san?"

"Ah, there is our lovely flower. We wondered where you vanished off to~" Tamaki singsonged.

"I had an examination," Yumi reminded them.

"We had a proposition for you!" Tamaki announced with glee.

"A proposition?" Yumi quirked an eyebrow.

"Yes," Kyoya said, taking over the conversation, "You have done fine work for the club-"

"Fine work indeed!" Tamaki echoed.

"And," Kyoya continued, giving Tamaki a tightlipped look of disapproval that the flamboyant blonde didn't even notice, "The Host Club was hoping to make your position more permanent."

Yumi frowned, "Listen guys, it's not that I don't like working for you. You're great tippers and aren't the worst clients I've had-" Nope, not even the Host Club beat the strange requests that came from the Black Magic Club, "- but you both have to realize that I work for the school. I don't really have time to join a club."

"You wouldn't just be joining the club!" Tamaki protested, practically vibrating with excitement. "We're going to hire you as the official Host Club contract event planner!"

"What?" Was all Yumi could say.

"Yes," Kyoya thankfully began to explain, "We've talked to Watanabe-san about hiring out your aid on a permeant basis. Technically, you'll still be working for Ouran Academy's gardening department."

"Even though, I'm really working for you."

"Exactly so. It shouldn't interfere with your paycheck at all."

"Isn't that expensive for you?" Yumi asked. Tamaki might be one to waste money but Kyoya was not.

"Not at all, in fact, you'll be saving us money," Kyoya explained, "You'll be saving me work by taking over a lot of tasks that I previously handled. Time is money, after all. We'll also be paying a set fee for your aid, instead of small fees for every task we assign you. Combing all those expenses into one actually lowers the cost."

That was all sound logic to Yumi. She wasn't even worried about Kyoya taking advantage of her help. Hana already worked her death - or would start to if Yumi kept working under her.

"This isn't going to interfere with my tip is it?" Yumi asked. She had plans for those Host Club tips!

"Not at all," Kyoya assured with a smile quirk of his lips. At least Yumi and Kyoya could understand each other when it came to money.

"Does this mean I get Saturdays off?" Yumi asked, signaling her agreement. She didn't want to seem too excited. She didn't let herself get too excited. Whenever she got excited about things they tended to fall apart.

"Unless there's an event." Kyoya assented.

Tamaki let out of whoop of glee, "Welcome to the family, imōto(2)!"

"I am not your imōto!" Yumi snapped.

Tamaki ignored Yumi, pulling her into a tight hug, "Imōto! Imōto!" He chanted.

Yumi groaned but let it happen. It wasn't like there was anything that could discourage Tamaki once he had decided something.

* * *

A/N:

(1) doctors, professors, and other professionals are often referred to with the honorific 'sensei'. Ishi also means doctor.

(2) little sister

And we've reached the end of Arc 2! A bit short - well not this chapter, but the arc in general.

Special shoutout to all my reviews for the last chapter: FALLING-ANGEL24, Momochan77, Guest, irishloveaffair

FALLING-ANGEL24 - yay for a new first time reviewer! I'm glad you find Yumi amusing. She'd be thrilled that someone liked her snarky sense of humor. xD

Momochan77 - thank you for your continued reviews. They are something I look forward to after every new update! And I dunno, was it a coincidence? ;)

Guest - I wonder ;)

irishloveaffair - I'mma be completely honest, your review is another reason that I gave such a fast update. Seriously made not only my day but my next few days. You are an utter darling.

Remember to review, reviews really get me motivated to update!


	14. Daisy Crowns

Review Responses:

 _Momochan77I:_ *nervous laughter* What was that about 'soon'? But hey, here it is!

 _FleurSuoh:_ Thank you very much, I hope you enjoy it!

 _JJ:_ Thank you very much. I strive to make my characters as realistic as possible while also keeping everything relatively simple in keeping with the tone set by the anime, so I'm glad that's working! And yes, the Kariuizawa Arc is going to be _really_ fun.

 _sallycoombs:_ Awesome! Glad you liked it!

 _Pocket Rocket22:_ Well, I think I would be breaking from the Ouran Host Club themes if there wasn't some sort of hardship in Yumi's life. It seems like the prerequisite for being a member of the host club is some sort of mild trauma.

 _Guest:_ Before Yumi wore dress pants and a nice blouse, now she's wearing her old school uniform which is about what you would expect of a public Japanese highschool. The cover art of this fanfiction shows the upper half of what Yumi would wear.

 _The Translator001:_ Always great to have new readers! (though you picked an unfortunate time to join in, sorry about that!) I'm glad you like my portrayal of Hani. The anime doesn't give him near enough screen time, but he's honestly one of my favorite characters. I'm a sucker for cute things and breaking stereotypes (and though Hani is a stereotype he breaks a lot of male gender roles) and honestly I'm a sucker for deceptive characters and Hani is more deceptive then any of the boys with that adorable Loli act.

I'm glad you like Yumi as well! I always get a bit annoyed when fanfictions just plug and chug dialogue from the anime. In some places it makes sense, but hey butterfly affect, throwing in a new person _should_ change things up.

 _TripleSmashTwins:_ (Is there a reference I'm missing in your name?) Haha, when we get to that arc, it should be great!

 _Mako:_ People are going to find out that I'm a giant 'ship tease'. I'm not really into poly-romances except in very specific and small doses but I do love the 'will they won't they' when it's done right and I love throwing in misdirections and complications. I wouldn't say every male character is 'competition' because that would be dull and also, I'm a firm believer that men and women can be just friends. But it's added tension and will hopefully play with expectations. Also, I'll admit, I really like to write flirty dialogue. I'm a huge flirt, and I have friendships based entirely around mock-flirting.

 _Airedhiella:_ Define 'soon'? xD

 _BloodOfMyLove:_ Thank you very much!

 _AJPJweallluvJJ:_ Done!

 _Reviewer:_ I'm glad you liking this story and are sympathizing with Yumi!

 _vriskaxmeenah:_ Ahaha, your enthusiasm is noted and appreciated!

 _Dei:_ Thank you so much! I've tried to make Yumi as realistic as possible and I'm glad that effort is paying off so well.

 _greenisacolorto:_ (green is actually my favorite color) Yeah, I know what you mean. I am the queen of the unpopular or obscure ships so I've attempted to read almost all of the OCxHani fanfiction out there and noticed that trend. On the surface, I understand why. Opposites attract, and it makes sense to have a meaner character paired up with a sweet one. Or conversely, having characters with the same defining characteristic get together (though I would argue immaturity is _not_ Hani's defining characteristic but rather his duplicity). However, I think people go to the extreme too much. People usually aren't that simple however, and if a character is too mean to nice (albeit pushy and annoying) people, they become unlikable. That _can_ work but Ouran fanfiction really isn't the place for that. A realistic Naruto fanfiction maybe, but not Ouran.

 _Pamela:_ Haven't forgotten I swear. My goal with 52 Pick Up is for this to be the first ever long haul fanfiction I take to completion. So I might drop off for a few months but I do intend to always return.

 _Booom BaBy:_ I'm glad!

 _thenextgreatcouchpotato:_ I present to you, the next chapter!

 _PippinSqueaks:_ Thank you, and done.

 _Kennacleon:_ Boy have you jumped on at the right time then! Thank you so much for your review. It put brought this story back into my brain and got me to do some work on it.

 _ShadowJinxed22:_ Other than finals slowly sucking my soul out, yes I'm fine. And here you are, the next chapter! I'll be honest, your review got me thinking about this fanfiction again and is part of the reason this update happened when it did.

A/N: Alright, with house keeping out of the way (and yeah, no, seriously thank you for all your reviews they are seriously amazing to read)! Hello! Look at me, back from the dead and actually updating. I bet you guys thought I was kidding when I said 'hiatus'! But no, I haven't dropped this story. It's the start of finals crunch week so I'm giving myself my last touch of freedom and I decided to actually update this thing. I actually had to go back and reread my own story to remember what was going on and to re-familiarize myself with everyone's character. Can't say when my next update will be, because you know, _finals_. But hey look, we're in a new arc and everything! Sorry that there's not a whole heck of a lot of canon events going on or even canon characters, but consider this a chance to re-familiarize yourself with Yumi and her outside-of-Ouran life.

* * *

 **Arc Three: The Unsuspecting Alice and the Group Project**

 **Chapter One: Daisy Crowns**

Dinner that night, Yumi broke the news to the Himuras over dinner. Yumi picked at her Sunomono(1) with her chopsticks, before casually mentioning, "I joined a club."

Tamiko grinned. "That's great!" She gushed.

"Well," Yumi backtracked, realizing that Tamiko wouldn't understand the full truth from that statement, "It's more like I'm working _for_ them. I'm still working for the gardening department. I'm just on a permeant consulting basis with the club." She explained.

When Tamiko raised her eyebrows, Yumi tried to wave away the whole explanation with: "It's just technicalities. I won't be working so early in the morning though." Realizing the implication, Yumi rushed to offer, "I can still drop the twins off, they'll just be a little early instead of super early."

"Yes!" Sora cheered, throwing her arms into the air, "No more drama club!"

Everyone, excluding Emi, raised an eyebrow at Sora's exclamation.

"What?" Sora asked, plopping a cucumber into her mouth. "Drama club is whatever. It's not like I hate it. I just have other things I want to do."

Yumi understood that. Having to take a club that only met in the mornings had seriously limited the twins' club options.

"You have to be in a club," Hibiki reminded his daughter gently.

"I know," Sora answered, "I want to join the art club." Sora informed them, "Emi wants to join the dance club." She volunteered, her tone teasing and almost condescending, which was strange for Sora - at least when she was talking about Emi.

"Sora!" Emi chided, almost raising her voice. Her hands came down a little too firmly on the table. She glared at her twin, who only responded with a cheeky grin.

"Why wouldn't you want to tell us?" Tamiko asked in a tone that suggested she thought Emi was being silly in keeping it a secret.

Emi ducked her head and mumbled a response that nobody could really make out.

"There's nothing to be embarrassed about, Emi-chan," Hibiki soothed. Unlike his wife who supported the school of "Harsh Love", Hibiki was much more gentle. "You can join dance club if you want to."

Emi and Sora both looked surprised. Yumi guessed that the twins hadn't ever done anything alone before. In her, admittedly, short stay with the Himuras, she certainly hadn't ever seen one twin without the other. They were getting older though, it probably was about time for them to start making other friends and developing a life outside of one another. All Yumi could hope for was a smooth transition. Sora was very independent and Emi had a strong sense of self, so Yumi couldn't imagine it being difficult. Right?

* * *

Friday came and went with little fanfare. Tamaki decided not to introduce Yumi as a member of the club until Monday, for dramatics. Yumi guessed that Kyoya went along with it because he didn't need her help and because the Host Club didn't have any plans for the weekend. She certainly wasn't going to complain. This was her first Friday (and Saturday) off since school began.

In fact, Yumi wasn't entirely sure what to do with her free time. It was unsettling to arrive home from school and realize that she had all this time and had no idea how to use it. Yumi did her most of her homework before she declared herself a workaholic for doing _all_ her homework on a Friday. After that, Yumi indulged in some of her old time-wasters that she hadn't touched since school had started- although without her old friends to sneak out with, her options were severally limited. She had one new crime novel her friends had gifted her when she had moved away, so Yumi cracked it open, reading for fun for the first time since moving to Tokyo.

When Saturday rolled around, Yumi had no reason to blow off her pool promise to the twins, and she didn't want to. She liked the twins (and was pretty starved for social interaction). Despite her promise, Yumi wasn't woken up early. She actually had a leisurely morning (a novel experience) before the twins burst into her room, swimsuits and coverups on, begging to go to the pool _now_. Yumi acquiesced to the twins request and changed into her swimsuit that she had bought for the occasion. She hadn't thought much about a cover up when she went shopping. All she had was her old one, which was just a piece of colorful fabric that she tied around her waist. Technically it could be tied in different "cute" ways, but Yumi had never attempted it before. Trying to learn now proved to be a disaster that she quickly gave up on. Sure, she had one leg completely on display and calling it a cover up was a bit of a stretch since it really didn't cover anything but it really wasn't worth the effort.

A pair of flip-flops later, Yumi was ready to walk the twins to the pool, the indoor pool. While the weather was warm for Yumi's almost bare legs - an outdoor pool would be a little too chilly for her tastes. The twins practically dragged Yumi down the stairs in their excitement.

The mood was spoiled - for Yumi - by Yuuto.

"Where are you girls off to?" Yuuto asked in a perfectly friendly tone.

"Onee-san, is taking us to the pool!" Sora excitedly chattered to Yuuto. Emi hung back behind Yumi. It was taking Emi a little longer to get accustomed to Yuuto. Yumi took that as a sign of good taste on Emi's part.

Yuuto raised an eyebrow and shot Yumi a look that rankled her, "It's a little cold for that, don't you think, Yu-pyon(3)." Yuuto had taken to shortening Yumi's name as well as adding the obnoxiously cutesy honorific.

"Indoor pool," Yumi explained simply, glaring at him. She was insulted that he thought she wasn't a good enough judge of the weather. Even though she wasn't in nearly the mood she had been in when she had first found out Yuuto was working for 'Flour + Love' and had subsequently ruined any good feelings that could have existed between them, Yumi was determined to maintain her distance and snarky behavior. Was it childish? Absolutely. Was it unbecoming of someone who prided themselves on their self control? Without a doubt. Was Yumi too stubborn and prideful to dig in her heels and try to fix their relationship? Yeah, she was a prideful coward. Plus, Yuuto made it easy to continue to be a bitch by continuing to be rude.

"Ah," Yuuto nodded, getting a look in his eye, "That's pretty far isn't it?"

"It's a bit of a walk..." Yumi admitted grudgingly.

"And you're walking?"

"The twins can handle it," Yumi answered defensively.

"Maybe if you want to carry them back," Yuuto smiled. Yumi glared.

"I could take you in the truck." He offered.

"Don't you have work?" Yumi could have just shot him down, but she would rather imply that he was irresponsible.

"My shift ends soon."

"Liar."

"Oh so you pay attention to my hours? I didn't know you cared so much." Yuuto winked. Yumi flushed with anger and embarrassment.

"Onee-san, stop flirting with Yuuto!" Sora tugged on Yumi's arm anxious to go.

Before Yumi could deny Sora's assessment of the situation because she certainly _was not_ flirting, Tamiko made an appearance. "What's going on here?" Tamiko asked, walking out from the storage room, "Are they going at it again?" She asked, addressing the twins rather than Yuuto or Yumi.

"Mhm!" Emi chirped before Yumi could shush her.

"You two..." Tamiko shook her head.

Yumi flushed, she didn't want Tamiko to be disappointed in her, yet she couldn't bring herself not to bait Yuuto (or to resist the urge to raise to his bait).

"No trouble, jyoushi-san(2)," Yuuto grinned, "I was just volunteering my services to Yu-pyon. It's a long walk to the indoor pool. I was offered to them in my truck."

"That's a great idea."

One of these days Yuuto was going to push Yumi too far and she was going to honestly murder him.

"Why don't you take work off early? I'm sure Yumi would appreciate having someone her own age tag along."

Today might be that day. Yumi might murder Yuuto today. She could bribe the twins to secrecy with candy. She read crime novels, she knew what not to do.

"Don't you think that's a great idea, Yumi?"

"Great idea." Yumi somehow managed to reply without grinding her teeth, "I'd love to spend the day with Yu-bō(4)." If Yuuto was going to call her by a cutesy name then it was only fair that Yumi fight fire with fire.

Yuuto's smile strained and Yumi counted that as a point in her favor.

* * *

And that was how Yumi ended up at the indoor pool with Sora, Emi, and her rival Yuuto. Yuuto, of course, didn't have a swim suit. So he had rolled up his trousers, ditched his shoes, and was dangling his legs in the water. Yumi contemplated pulling him in and soaking his work clothes but decided that was a little harsh, even if it was Yuuto.

For the most part, Yumi ignored Yuuto and played games with the twins, which he seemed to be fine with. Even with Yumi introducing them to all sorts of games to the twins, their boundless energy kept them from exhausting at the same rate she was. Eventually Yumi had to beg a break and let the twins entertain themselves for a bit. She pulled herself up out of the pool next to Yuuto, turned around, and flopped on her back. Her legs dangled in the water still but Yumi didn't care enough to do anything about it.

Yuuto had to shift away from Yumi to keep himself dry. Yumi counted that as another victory. She would beat Yuuto into submission through the power of mild annoyances. Glancing over at the slightly older boy, Yumi took note that he had set the book he had broke open upon their arrival down and had taken over watching the twins instead of reading. Yumi's lips twitched in irritation. She didn't want Yuuto doing her any favors, though it really was his turn.

"Tired?" Yuuto asked cheekily when he caught Yumi looking.

"Let's see you try to keep up with them." Yumi snapped.

"I didn't imply I could do better," Yuuto conceded though his grin didn't let Yumi feel like she won. She counted that as a wash, no point to either side.

Yumi didn't reply and just closed her eyes and focused on her breathing. She was in pretty good shape. Riding her bike miles everyday and working in the garden had kept her in shape. But there was just no matching the boundless energy of young kids.

When Yumi was sure she wasn't going to melt into the tiled floor, she cracked her eye and asked, "What's that book you brought?" Making conversation with Yuuto wasn't really on her to-do list, but just laying next to him while the twins played was actually rather boring.

"Tomogui by Tanaka Shin'ya." Yuuto told her, "It's a bunch of short stories, but they're all sort of centered on this teenage boy and his relationship with his dad. He hates him but he acts a lot like him anyway."

Yumi frowned.

"You might liked it."

"I wouldn't." Yumi answered immediately. It sounded too unsettling for her.

"You don't like books?"

Yumi shrugged. She didn't feel one way or the other when it came to reading.

"What sort of books do you read then?"

"I used to read a lot of detective books when I was a kid. I haven't really had time to read for a while. I guess I fell out of the habit." She had started to revive the habit last night, of course, but if she brought that up Yuuto would ask her why and Yumi wasn't into personal sharing.

"Not a big fan of crime novels." Yuuto admitted, "Any particular reason you like that genre?"

Yumi shrugged, "I liked trying to figure them out. They're books but also puzzles, I guess. I was also being defiant."

"Your parents didn't want you reading crime novels?"

Yumi frowned. She shouldn't have mentioned that last part. "They were out of the picture at that point. But I imagined my father wouldn't have approved, which was all that mattered," Yumi answered because she felt that she should answer since she brought it up. She kept a note of finality in her reply. She didn't want to keep talking about it.

"Yeah, I get that..." Yuuto agreed and caught her tone since he didn't ask any follow up questions.

The two sat in a silence that wasn't uncomfortable before Yumi eventually decided that she was fine to resume playing with the twins and slid back into the water. She didn't even realize that this had been their first civil conversation since Yuuto had started working for Tamiko.

And the rest of the afternoon passed like that. Eventually the twins made friends with some other kids around their age who were at the pool and Yumi was released from her service as chief entertainer. She took the spot next to Yuuto and they chatted, again civilly. There was still bickering and jabs, but they were the sort of bickering and jabs that were similar to Yumi's relationship with her old friends.

"I'm sorry," Yumi blurted randomly in a silence that had developed between the two of them while they watched the twins play.

Yuuto turned and looked at her, confused, Yumi elaborated, her words pouring out of her mouth like vomit, "I've been terrible to you and you really haven't done anything to deserve it."

"I did answer in kind," Yuuto pointed out.

"Yeah, but I started it."

Yuuto didn't deny that. He couldn't. Instead he asked, "Why _did_ you start it?"

"I guess I was embarrassed. I told you stuff... well.. I'm not that open. And then you were suddenly _there_ in my life knowing that stuff..."

Yuuto nodded his head. Yumi could tell he understood. Maybe he had experienced the same with trying to look out for his own family. Yumi could understand being strong. She had to be since she didn't have anyone to rely on. She couldn't really understand the idea of being strong for _someone_ , just like Yuuto couldn't fully understand what it was like to be strong for _yourself_. But it was similar enough that Yuuto understood why Yumi had been irrationally lashing out.

He have her a sheepish smile, "I probably made things worse when I almost told Tamiko-san."

Yumi didn't give a verbal response. She scratched the back of her head with a similarly sheepish look that served as confirmation.

"I won't tell. Anything. Anything that you tell me," Yuuto promised in a hushed tone, even though the twins were too preoccupied to even conceivably be listening in. But the sentiment warmed Yumi towards him, "Unless you say I can. I uh, understand."

Yumi gave him a small smile, "And I will, in turn, stop being such a heinous bitch."

"I don't know about that," Yuuto said, his voice taking a teasing edge, "You're sort of cute when you're being a 'heinous bitch'."

Yumi gave him an unamused look. Yuuto laughed. Still, internally, Yumi was grateful. It was nice to have a friend, a friend that understood to a degree what she was going through. Someone she could talk to about her problems to and not have to worry about him spilling them or judging them.

* * *

A/N:

(1) Cucumber salad. And yes, I just wanted to use the Japanese word for it.

(2) Boss

(3) Pyon is a slang honorific that expresses that the speaker is being very cutesy with the person addressed.

(4) Bō is an honorific that is meant to express endearment. It is used exclusively for boys, usually young boys or infants. In context, Yumi is calling Yuuto a baby and sarcastically expressing endearment.

Moving away from a play by play of the anime for this arc, so be prepared!

Title is a really obscure reference. At the beginning of "Alice in Wonderland", Alice is making flowers crowns - I believe with daisies or else in the Disney movie it's daises. And currently Yumi is outside of "wonderland" a.k.a Ouran. Also, do you guys like it when I explain the title or not? xD

Announcement: We've more than passed 50 reviews so I'm going to write you guys an omake, and guess what? You guys can help me pick the theme! It can be anything. Something about Yumi's past. Something about another canon or oc character. You could go meta and suggest some sort of interview with the 'cast', or you could go the non-canon route with some sort of AU.

Rules: in what would be a normal review, include a suggestion of what you would want the omake to be about. I'll pick my top fave suggestions and open up a poll for you guys.

Remember reviews are the most motivating thing to a writer!


	15. Mad Tea Party

_Insanity-Brilliance:_ Yup, tentatively back! Summer break has started but I'll be working by the end of the month, so I'm still going to be slow. Also this arc is going to be a bitch to right, but hopefully a fun bitch.

 _SyConstance:_ I'm glad you liked the chapter!

 _Madam3Mayh3m:_ Haha, well this chapter is much longer.

 _AJPwealluvJJ:_ Haha, well that's _already_ something I planned on doing later on, so if you wanna suggest something else you can.

 _Momochan77:_ I'm glad you like the title explanations.

 _Victo557:_ Haha, yeah, I was trying to find a new angle that hasn't been already taken by the other fanfictions and then I rewatched the first few episodes and was like "where the heck did they get the tropical plants from? I feel so sorry for whoever had to set that all up." And then, Yumi was born.

 _Falling-angel24:_ Haha, I had to reread it too, and I wrote it. It's been a long time. Hmm an omake about Yumi's past might be interesting. Is there anything in particular you're curious about? (something innocuous because no spoilers~)

 _LKyellow:_ Yay! I love new reviewers, I plan to keep going though I can't be counted on for being regular in my posting.

 _LeAvaBella:_ Your long reviews made my week, just so you know ;). There's going to be at least an arc per episode, but I may through in extra arcs and ignore certain episodes when it makes sense, so I can't exactly give you a number. I'm a ship tease but I'm also a great believer in male and female friendship so Yuuto and Yumi should have some fun interactions. I can't tell you where their relationship is going because that would be telling~ But I think you'll enjoy it.

* * *

 **Arc Three: The Unsuspecting Alice and the Group Project**

 **Chapter Two: Mad Tea Party**

Monday was the day that Yumi hated the most. Not only was it the _objectively_ worst day of the week but Yumi had to get up early to drag herself to work. Not _this_ day, however. This day, and for many more Mondays, Yumi would be able to sleep in - or at least, sleeping in for _her_ \- and this put Yumi in a very good mood.

Of course, any good mood Yumi was in was bound to crash and burn upon meeting the unstopping soul crushing force that was Ouran Academy. Yumi's good mood plummeted down upon opening her gym locker to find that her shoes had been utterly trashed. Not her gym shoes, which were still firmly on her feet, but her school shoes. Yumi rubbed her nose, doing everything she could to keep her distress off her face. She was still in the locker room and one of the perpetrators might be watching her right now. Yumi had zero intention of giving them what they wanted, a reaction. Her shoes had been shredded with what Yumi could only guess were kitchen sheers (cudoos to the princesses for walking into an actual kitchen and knowing what knives were).

Yumi had to admit, the rabid fangirls were more bold then she had thought they would be. It wasn't for lack of bravery that Yumi's school clothes had been spared. Yumi's first class of the day was gym, which meant that she just wore what she would wear to gym and stored her school clothes in her backpack. Her school clothes were in her arms about to be stored in her locker when Yumi had discovered her school shoes. Yumi stored her school shoes in her gym locker on a permeant basis, since it was one less thing to carry home and she never wore them at home anyway.

Yumi was mildly impressed that her lock had been smashed off. It wasn't a hard thing to do but it was more than she thought the fangirls were capable of (Yumi moved their 'threat level' up a little in her head from yellow to yellow-orange). She sighed and shut her locker. There was no way she was storing her clothes in her locker now. Instead she jogged back to the classroom grabbed her backpack and stored her clothes, before jogging back.

She wasn't even late to gym class.

The snickering that went on through the day was obnoxious. Yumi was able to figure out very quickly who her active enemies were, who were her passive enemies (people who enjoyed her misery but weren't going to actively cause it), who were the neutrals, and who were sympathetics. It went without saying that Yumi didn't have an allies. Yumi already knew her active and passive enemies outnumbered those who were indifferent or sympathetic towards her. Although it was nice to discover that she wasn't outnumbered by _much_.

The girls who had trashed her locker were the same ones that had confronted her after her lunch with Haruhi. They had made sure Yumi knew that they were the ones who trashed her lockers, although unfortunately not clear enough that Yumi could go to someone with actual evidence. It was abundantly clear to Yumi that she was going to continue to be a target to these girls and that more likely then not, a confrontation was going to happen - eventually. So Yumi decided that she ought to at least learn about her bullies to even the playing ground.

The unofficial leader of their group was Matsunaga Reona, 2A. She was the daughter of a famous musician and planed to follow in her mother's footsteps. Yumi thought the profession suited her. She was nothing if not a self-involved diva. Reona would fit _right_ in. Her accomplice, the girl that looked like she was a half-giant, Miura Yoriko and was also in 2A. Her family did something important with computers but Yumi didn't know much about computers so she had blocked out most of that information. The only one that was in Yumi's class, 2B, was Osaka Naeko. The Osaka owned Eden Lawn Service, they did the lawn maintenance of more then 80% of the students at Ouran.

Yumi got all this information from Okyokawa Izuru who gave Yumi the information without even questioning why she was asking. His cute warning of "You probably shouldn't get involved with them though, Yumi-san... Ano... They can be little... abrasive." warmed Yumi's heart. It was a nice thought even if it was too late.

Yumi was definitely already involved. Although she planed on ending their _involvement_. She just didn't know _how_ to yet. Yumi was out of her depth. Back in Karuizawa, Yumi would have taken them behind the school, broken their leader's nose and after a week or so of detention, that would have been that. Unfortunately, that was not an option at Ouran. She would have to find a crafty way to put them in their place.

* * *

The school day did have a bright spot: Yumi's employment at the Host Club. Kyoya had called Yumi on Sunday to give her the time she was supposed to be at Host Club to help him set up. Kyoya was the only Host Club present when she arrived and he had a list of thing for her to do.

He did cast one curious and questioning glance down at Yumi's gym shoes.

"Since I'm going to be on my feet," Yumi automatically answered.

She didn't realize how suspicious it was that she noticed immediately that Kyoya was curious about her shoes- almost like she had a response prepared (which she totally did). Kyoya did, but Yumi wasn't looking at his face anymore but was bustling around getting things ready.

Haruhi showed a few minutes later, not late as Yumi had been early. Her arms were laden with the signature Host Club roses. Haruhi was a very smart, capable young women, but she was terrible with flowers. After watching out of the corner of her eye for three minutes Yumi couldn't take it anymore.

"You're going to bleed yourself out, Haruhi," Yumi half-scolded, shooing Haruhi away from the task.

And that was how the rest of the Host Club found them. With Yumi kneeing at a coffee table, removing the thorns from multicolored roses while Haruhi watched on trying to learn how to do it by watching, with Kyoya sitting on a couch just behind them typing away at his computer.

"Yu-chan?!"

"Yumi-senpai?!"

And a grunt of surprise that could only be Takashi, indicated that the Host Club had arrived and had noticed Yumi's presence.

"I see you have noticed our newest member!" Tamaki announced dramatically, prancing over to Yumi. Yumi discreetly set down the paring knife she was using to dethorn roses since Tamaki was probably untrustworthy around sharp objects.

Tamaki pulled Yumi to her feet and spun her around, disorienting the poor teen, before holding out his hands in away that indicated "tada!" as if Yumi was a magic trick Tamaki had just preformed.

"Yay! Yu-chan is going to be working with us!" Mitsukuni exclaimed, throwing his arms around Yumim's waist.

Then, Mitsukuni _picked_ Yumi up and _spun_ her around. Yumi blinked heavily as her feet hit the ground again. For a loli, Mitsukuni was sure strong.

"Yeah," cooed Kaoru (guessing by his voice)

"Should be fun~" finished Hikaru (she thought?).

The twins had come up on either side of Yumi once Hani had set her down. Kaoru was playing with a lock of Yumi's hair that had fallen free from her side ponytail. Hikaru was twirling her side ponytail around his fingers. Yumi swatted at their hands.

"You two _really_ need to learn the meaning of personal space," she scolded.

The twins just grinned, "Aw, we didn't mean to make you uncomfortable~"

They couldn't have sounded more insincere if they tried.

"Now twins, you leave my imōto(1) alone!" Tamaki broke in.

Yumi twitched and tried to decide if 'imōto' was worse then the 'hime' honorific or not.

The twins pouted but actually listened to their 'boss' for once (Tamaki was good for something apparently).

Yumi was given a backstage pass to how the Host Club prepared for their guests. It was really, very amusing. Everyone pushed and shoved and jostled to get into their most presentable and 'alluring' positions. Tamaki would pull away and review everyone critically. He was like a okā-san(2) at a okiya(3), preparing his geisha for a performance.

It was a real funny sight: Kyoya was clearly not into it (why did girls like him again?); Mitsukuni was maybe _too_ into it and his exuberance kept getting in his way; no matter what Tamaki did there was no changing the fact that Takashi stood stiff as a board; the twins seemed to preoccupied with teasing Haruhi then they did with getting ready (and Tamaki's head looked it might actually _explode_ from all the hot pressure building up in it); Haruhi, bless her heart, had the most deadpan expression on her face whenever Tamaki tried to correct or steer her towards any change in her stance.

It was very, very funny, and Yumi was inches from laughing, until Tamaki insisted that she join them.

Yumi held up her arms in the shape of an 'x', "No way," she deadpanned.

"But you're a part of the club too!"

"I'm not a host. I work behind the scenes. Ergo, I should be behind the scenes."

"But Yu-hime!"

"I know this might be a surprise to you, Tamaki-san, but I enjoy living and when I do eventually die, I want it to be at an old age and peacefully. I do not want to be ripped apart by your guests before I graduate high school."

"Now that's a little dramatic-" Haruhi cut in, uncharacteristically taking Tamaki's side.

Yumi arched an eyebrow.

"A _little_ dramatic," Haruhi admitted, backing down.

"But don't you wanna pose with us, Yumi-senpai?" The twins purred.

"No."

"So cold!"

"The kuudere strikes again!"

Yumi's protests died upon meeting Tamaki's puppy dog eyes. He wasn't better than Mitsukuni, who had perfected the technique. Nor was it better than the twins who were proteges. But Yumi was highly susceptible to begging and Tamaki caught her chin when she tried to look away.

So, incredibly unhappily, Yumi _did_ join in on their little performance and in the process almost choked to death on a rose petal, though she managed to play it off until they broke formation.

* * *

"Never again," Yumi announced as she dropped into the seat beside Kyoya who was tapping away on his computer.

A small smirk played on his lips, "Weren't you in drama club?" He asked slyly, "I would think you would enjoy the theatrics."

"You mean the burning stares of the dozens of rapid fangirls?" Yumi corrected, "And do I want to know how you found out I was in drama?"

Kyoya responded with silence.

"You do know breaking into someone else's records is _illegal_ , right?"

No response.

" _Right?"_

No response. Yumi huffed and gave up, missing another smirk from Kyoya.

"So, why no guests for you?" Yumi asked.

"Somebody has to actually maintain the finances of the club."

Yumi gave a sly smile. She had a feeling Kyoya didn't enjoy hosting frivolous, silly, fan-girling high schoolers any more than she did.

"Well, now with me taking over, maybe you can spare the time." She mentioned nonchalantly.

Kyoya didn't respond, but the way his eye twitched made Yumi grin.

Yumi: 1

Kyoya: 0

The conversation between Yumi and Kyoya lulled and Yumi became aware of the guests who couldn't keep their eyes to themselves. They kept glancing over at Yumi, watching her out of the corner of their eyes, or flat out _gawked_. The hostility in the air was palpable. In Yumi's imagination she could actually _see_ the tension.

Kyoya, being the apparent bastard that he was, sent Yumi around with tea and tea cakes. Maybe he thought if Yumi integrated herself into the mechanics of the Host Club the girls would forget that she existed. Yumi hoped that was why he sent her (and not to mess with her) and she really hoped that it would work. Of course, that didn't mean she _thought_ it was actually going to work. She just hoped.

Yumi stopped at Haruhi's table first. The girl put Yumi at ease and had a way of soothing awkward situations over.

"Thank you, Yumi-senpai, I would love some tea." Haruhi responded when Yumi asked.

Her guests were two third years who looked like they were nearing the end of their twittering fangirl stage. The stouter girl gave Yumi an encouraging smile.

"I'll have some, as well, thank you."

Her companion, a brunette with enviable curls (although they were most likely fake), stared openly at Yumi until the stouter girl elbowed her. Coming out of her ogling the brunette blushed from embarrassment and all but threw her teacup at Yumi in her haste to hand it over so she could fill it.

"Yes, please, thank you!" She blurted and then blushed harder when she realized she had all but yelled at Yumi.

Haruhi gave the girl an encouraging an nonjudgemental smile that didn't look at all like she was silently laughing at her.

"Have either of you ladies met, Yumi-senpai?" She asked.

The brunette shook her head fiercely, apparently not trusting herself to speak.

The stouter girl gave Yumi another kind smile, "No, we have not had the pleasure."

"Ah, then I should introduce you. Yumi-senpai, this is Toda Karin and Nagata Emika," Haruhi introduced, gesturing first to the brunette then to the stouter girl.

"Karin-san, Emika-san, this is Taka Yumi."

"It's very nice to meet you, Taka-san," Emika said, smiling at Yumi. Emika didn't seem the fangirl type at all. Yumi expected her to be a very jovial individual, Emika had that sort of face. Instead she was very polite and calm. It probably took a lot to ruffle her feathers.

"Yeah," Karin parroted. If the blush was any indicator, she was still very embarrassed.

"Likewise," Yumi greeted, bowing her head in a slight bow. "Hajimemashite (4)."

Karin resumed staring. Emika smiled apologetically as Yumi handed Emika her tea.

"I believe Karin-chan is curious as to how you joined the Host Club, Taka-san." Karin shot Emika a betrayed look. "I must confess, I am a little curious as well."

"Oh, I haven't joined the club," Yumi corrected as she poured Haruhi's tea.

"Yumi-senpai is consulting for the Host Club," Haruhi explained.

"So you just work for the Host Club," Emika clarified, raising her voice slightly, so it could be heard at the nearby tables.

"Hai(5)."

To all the girls who were listening in, there was a collective sigh of relief. Emika gave Yumi another smile that looked slightly exasperated. Even Karin looked relieved, though she had the good character to look embarrassed about it.

"Yumi-senpai is a very good worker," Haruhi complimented, "She was a big help during the dance and the flower viewing reception was all her work."

Yumi flushed under the praise and didn't have time to clarify that Kyoya had done a lot of the work for the flower viewing reception.

"That's amazing!" Karin enthused, "I loved the ball and the flower viewing reception was so beautiful. You are so talented, Yumi-san!"

Emika hid a smile behind her tea cup, "You could tell a lot of hard work went into both events. You are a very dedicated worker, Yumi-san."

Yumi flushed slightly, "You are both too kind. Really Ootori-san did a lot of the work. I just helped out." She bowed her head. "If you'll excuse me," Yumi said upon straightening, "I have to deliver tea to the other guests. It was very nice to meet you." Yumi meant it and so she flashed them a genuine smile before moving on.

Karin watched her go, looking a little starstruck.

* * *

The table Yumi drifted to was Mitsukuni and Takashi's. There were four girls at their tables as opposed to Haruhi's two.

"Yu-chan!" Mitsukuni greeted her enthusiastically. He jumped off his spot between two dark-haired girls and leapt _over_ the coffee table, only so he could throw his arms around her. The cart jostled, and only Yumi's tight grip kept it from toppling over and spilling.

"Ladies, this is Yu-chan!" Mitsukuni introduced exuberantly, and with the manners a young child might use to introduce - that is his introduction was poor. He gave them a nickname that they couldn't use to address her with and failed to give Yumi their names at all.

There was a moment of silence as everyone collectively sweat-dropped at the poor introduction. Mitsukuni 'realized' his poor introduction and he scuffed his shoe against the floor.

"Did I mess up?" He asked, looking up at Yumi with watery eyes.

Yumi wanted to face palm but she recognized the act and played along. She gave Mitsukuni a ghost of a smile, "No, you did just fine." She reassured. As Takashi reached over and put his hand comfortingly on Mitsukuni's head and ruffled his golden locks.

When Yumi's eyes resettled on the guests, they had hearts in their eyes.

Yumi began to serve them. Things were going well, to her surprise. The girls didn't seem utterly awful. A few of them still looked rather jealous, others suspicious. But all in all, they weren't _terrible_. Nobody had even tried to rip her apart yet.

It didn't last.

At the twins table sat one of Yumi's enemies (that seemed dramatic but those shoes were expensive, dammit), Naeko. Naeko couldn't have been radiating anymore disdain if she had tried.

"Yumi-senpai!" The twins cooed as Yumi approached.

Yumi tried not to roll her eyes.

"Can I offer you some tea?" She asked as politely as she could. It really steamed her up to be serving Naeko, who had trashed her shoes only this morning. Yumi got the feeling she was just going to have to get used to serving spiteful, little harpies.

The twins nodded their assent and Yumi poured the first teacup for the twins. However when she moved to pour the second, she felt two hands stop her from pouring the teapot. Glancing up, she looked into the intense eyes of Hikaru (or she guessed, since he seemed to be the dominant twin during Host hours). Yumi was embarrassed to admit but her heart did skip a beat.

"No, thank you, Yumi-senpai." Hikaru's eyes smoldering gaze shifted away from Yumi to Kaoru, for whom the look was actually for, "Kaoru and I will share."

Yumi almost audibly groaned.

"H-hikaru!" Kaoru protested, "You're embarrassing me! Just let Yumi-senpai pour you a cup."

"Why?" Hikaru questioned, faking innocence, "We share drinks all the time at home."

The girls were watching with the same intensity that Yumi had seen elderly women watch soap operas with.

Hikaru picked up the teacup and brought it to Kaoru's lips. Kaoru made a token protest but drank a shy, nervous sip. Hikaru then took the cup to his own lips.

"S-second hand kiss..." one of the girls breathed, her hands covering her burning cheeks.

Yumi did actually snort at that, but nobody noticed her, nobody but Naeko.

Naeko gave Yumi a sneer that was vaguely disguised as a smile. "What's the matter, Taka?" She asked snootily.

Yumi resisted the urge to roll her eyes, "Just not my cup of tea," she joked, hoping that Naeko would take a hint and back off. Yumi was all for a confrontation but preferably not in front of her new employers. There was little doubt in Yumi's mind if the Host Club had to choose between her and a guest that they would choose the guest.

"Figures." Naeko sneered, "A commoner couldn't possibly understand."

Yumi gave a terse smile, "Oh, no, Osaka-san," Yumi denied, widening her eyes with false innocence, "It's not that I don't understand. I just don't share that fet-" Yumi paused, letting her implication settle in, "- _interest..._ in _that_ sort of thing."

Naeko glowered at Yumi, hating her implication that she was as 'low' as to have a fetish. What Naeko thought enjoying two brothers openly flirt with each other was, other than a fetish, Yumi didn't know.

Yumi strolled away with a skip in her step. She preferred to just punch her problems in the face, but subtly insulting someone was oddly satisfying. Her technique still needed some work, Yumi could tell that her jab had been trite, but with the practice that was bound to come Yumi was sure she'd get better.

As Yumi was heading towards the last area she had to refresh, Tamaki's guests, Mitsukuni came running towards her.

"Yu-chan! Yu-chan!" He sing-songed, bringing all of the attention in the room onto them.

Yumi didn't notice his untied shoelaces but Takashi did. He was halfway out of his seat, a reprimand on his tongue when Mitsukuni stepped on his shoelaces and went dramatically sprawling on to the ground.

Yumi's instincts kicked in and she was at Mitsukuni's side at the same time as Takashi (which was really impressive since then gentle giant seemed to teleport whenever his 'young lord' was in trouble). She helped Mitsukuni to his feet and sat him on Takashi's knee.

Yumi clucked her tongue at Mitsukuni's shoelaces. One was untied and the other was such a large floppy bow that it was likely to result in tripping as well.

"Mitsukuni-senpai, you need to tie your shoelaces better."

"I'm sorry, Yu-chan." Mitsukuni whimpered, his voice wavering with tears. "Takashi ties them for me. But I wanted to tie them on my own for once."

The urge to rub her temples was strong.

Yumi cast her eyes up at Takashi as she tied Mitsukuni's shoelaces deftly, "You shouldn't enable him, you know, Mori-senpai." She scolded lightly.

Takashi grunted, and looked away, looking chastised.

Yumi rolled her eyes, "There you go." She announced cheerfully.

Then Yumi realized how close Mitsukuni was to her. Then she realized that this was all an act. He wasn't a little kid. He was a teenager (dammit, how had she forgotten that?). Mitsukuni was a teenager who was almost at eye level with her chest.

Yumi reeled back, Mitsukuni had a mischievous grin fixed on his face, and Yumi doubted that the real 'devil type' were the twins.

"Can I have a cookie, Yu-chan?" Mitsukuni whimpered.

Yumi, ready to escape this surreal experience quickly handed him a cookie. Takashi lead Mitsukuni off by the hand. Everyone cooed at how 'cute' they were and Yumi even heard a few comments about how 'motherly' she was.

Oh no. **No way**. Yumi would rather be barely tolerated then windup as an actual Host. There was no way Taka Yumi would ever be Taka Yumi Host "Motherly Type". Death before dishonor.

* * *

(1) Little sister.

(2) While okā-san translated literally to 'mother', in context it refers to the proprietress of an okiya.

(3) A boarding house where geisha live.

(4) The Japanese greeting when meeting someone for the first time.

(5) Yes.

A/N: I know the arc refers a group project. I promise we're getting there!

The omake suggestions is still going on, please still submit them (in your review) if you have ideas. The poll will probably be going up the next time I update, so this is your last chance to get your suggestions in! If you've already submitted one, you can still submit another one.


	16. Deck of Hearts

**Arc Three: The Unsuspecting Alice and the Group Project**

 **Chapter Three: Deck of Hearts**

A/N: Uuuuuuh I'm back? I say.. like what two years later? Gosh has it been that long? I did mean it when I said I hadn't dropped this! Your lovely comments and getting back into this fandom brought me back. There is a serious lack of Mitsukuni x OC and it is killing me. BUT SERIOUSLY your comments really did bring me back. Always review no longer how long the story hasn't been updated, coz you never know... shout out to AliceInTheCountryOfClover who reviewed in 2017 like a champ.

Anyway, y'all are so sweet and uh I hope some of you come back? Sorry for a two year delay! Hopefully the next one won't be so long! Unoriginal title coz.. yeah… I'll admit I'm out of practice with naming chapters. There was an art to it. This also hasn't been as heavily edited as usual because I wanted to rush it out for you guys. Sorry if it's a little rough. Also if the style dramatically shifts halfway through its because half of this was written pre-two year time skip. I hope my writing style hasn't gotten worse… I'm only not responding to comments because I do not have ANY idea which ones I have or haven't responded to. They're all so familiar to me by now. I've reread them a hundred times as I struggled for inspiration. BUT GOD AS MY WITNESS I WILL FINISH THIS FANFICTION IF IT KILLS ME.

* * *

"Today, we'll be talking about your group project!" Mutou-sensei announced.

Death, Yumi decided, would have been kinder. The group project. The bane of all students existence. Even if you got along with your classmates, group projects were awful. You had to choose between your friends for partners, which was awkward and bound to make someone angry (and they would be passive aggressive about for the duration of the projects). Or, you were assigned partners. If you were assigned partners, you were getting the slacker or the person who would miraculously turn into a slacker. Group projects were hell.

Okyokawa Izuru turned around in his seat and smiled at Yumi, "Hey, do you want to be partners?"

Yumi returned the smile - though she was aware she probably looked more surprised then anything, "Yeah, sure." Maybe group projects weren't so bad. Izuru was a good student and had been nice to her on multiple occasions. She noticed dark looks from Naeko, whatever the awful girl had been planning had clearly gone wrong with Izuru's offer. Yumi shot Naeko a smile that was all teeth. The smile of a predator. She wanted Naeko to know that she _wasn't_ scared of her.

At lunch, Yumi attempted to head off with Izuru to talk about their project, a plan that backfired when the Hitachiin twins appeared out of nowhere

"Where are you going, senpai?" The Hitachiin twins asked in sync, their arms blocking Yumi's way forward.

"I'm going to eat lunch with Izuru-san." Yumi told them blunt.

The twins exchanged a look, before looking Izuru up and down. The look they gave him resembling the look a cat gave a canary. Izuru immediately felt the blood drain out of his cheeks.

"Eh, why _him_ , senpai?" Twin one asked, throwing an arm around her shoulder. If Yumi had to guess, she would say it was Kaoru.

"Yeah, you should be eating with us. The Host Club _always_ eats lunch together, senpai," Hikaru (Yumi guessed) informed her, cutting Yumi off before she could answer Kaoru's question. He was walking around Izuru sizing him up.

Yumi didn't really consider her particularly close to the Host Club, and not to the twins, she wondered just what the heck was going on.

"We have a project that we wanted to talk-"

"You can talk later," Hikaru all but ordered Yumi. Before Yumi could retort, she was being hauled off by the twins. Yumi honestly considered resetting her "days with violence" counter back to zero and letting the twins know _exactly_ how she felt about being manhandled.

They deposited her at a table in the cafeteria before taking a seat on either side of her. Mitsukuni sat across from her, Takashi at his side. On the other side of Hikaru was Haruhi with Tamaki beside her and Kyoya across from her.

"Hey, Yumi-senpai," Haruhi greated, leaning around Hikaru, "You look stressed."

"The twins kidnapped me again," Yumi grumbled.

"You don't want to sit with us, Yu-chan?" Mitsukuni asked, widening his eyes dramatically.

Yumi quickly looked up to the ceiling and away from the cute eyes, "Ugh, that's not what I meant." She opened up her bento.

"That boy looked like some moonstruck idiot." One of the twins grumbled.

"Yeah, he totally likes you." The other twin agreed, equally miffed.

"What?!" Tamaki exclaimed, slamming his hand on the table, "No, boy can move a move on my imōto!"

Mitsukuni nodded his rapidly, something stirring uncomfortably within him at the idea of Yumi with another boy.

"He's not making a move-" Yumi began to deny before huffing, "Even if he _was_ , it wouldn't be _any_ of your guy's business." She stressed.

"If your work suffers because-" Kyoya began only to be shut off by Yumi pointing at him.

"No." She said very firmly. Kyoya's lips pulled up slightly.

"If you're really interested in him, imōto, you should at least let us vet him." Tamiki pleaded, clapping his hands together like he was begging.

Yumi gapped, "What? _Vet?_ No! You aren't investigating him. And who said anything about me being interested in him! We're working on a _project_ together." Yumi gave the twins a fierce glare at that. The twins grinned. They weren't keen on sharing Yumi now that she had found herself within their tiny social group, but they had blown this up mostly to get a rise out of the little wild flower.

"Oh, just a project." Tamaki sighed sounding very relieved.

"What's your project on?" Mitsukuni asked getting Yumi's attention to focus on him. He felt relieved that Yumi didn't appear interested in this boy, but he was sure that was just because girls sometimes neglected their friends when they got a new boyfriend.

Lunch ended with Yumi successfully managing to keep the Host Club from making Izuru's life difficult. Yumi was mercifully released from the Host Club's grasp back to 1-B.

"I really am sorry." Yumi said, making her apologies to Izuru. She hadn't really fought all that hard against the twins. She could have easily gotten up from the table and found Izuru. Back in Karuizawa, Yumi would have caused a scene. But back then she wasn't balancing friends, work, and livelihood.

"It's no trouble Yumi-san. They're like your bosses, right? You couldn't really say no."

Yumi frowned. Izuru's line of thinking matched her own. Yet, she didn't like hearing him say it. The host club kept calling her their friend, but friends could choose not to hang out with each other. Yumi had yet to tell the club no to anything since she started their formal work relationship. If other people saw it that way too, maybe the club was just being nice by calling her their friend.

"Yeah… I guess…"

Izuru picked up on the mood shift. "Sorry they boss you around so much." He offered, not helping. Yumi gave him a fake smile. "Do you want to work on the project at my house after class?" He offered.

Yumi blinked. His house had to be ridiculously fancy. Yumi was both intrigued and embarrassed. But she liked Izuru and she trusted his judgement. He wouldn't invite her over just to make fun of her or rub his wealth in her face. And if his parents had a problem with her, Yumi was sure he wouldn't bring her over. "Sure, Izuru-san, that sounds like fun." She said, and honestly meant it.

* * *

Yumi held her arms up like an 'X'. "No way. I'm not wearing that." She denied.

"But Yumi-senpai." Chimed twin one. "Our mom designed this just for you!" Finished twin two.

"How did you even get my measurements you pervs!"

The twins just grinned.

"Your usual attire won't work for today, Yumi-san." Kyoya insisted, pushing the formal kimono at her.

"Yeah a school girl outfit doesn't work with traditional cosplay." The twins agreed. Though they definitely had ulterior motives. While Yumi was no where near as cute as Haruhi, she had a rustic charm about her. They wanted to see if they could class up that charm. Also, they didn't get to play dress up with Haruhi in the ways they wanted. Yumi was an adequate substitute.

"It worked for Inuyasha…" Yumi grumbled.

"Otaku?!" The twins gapped at Yumi.

"Uh. I don't think knowing one of the most popular animes makes me an otaku but maybe I'm not sure on the definition." Yumi dismissed, turning back to Kyoya. "Fine. I'll wear it." She looked around for Haruhi. "Hey!" She yelled catching the girl's attention, "You know how to tie one of these things?"

The twins sniffed. "Never worn a kimono before?" Hikaru asked. His tone was a little sharper than before, but then he didn't take kindly to Yumi's slight.

Yumi rolled her eyes. "I have. Just not one with so much fabric."

"I don't believe it's longer than the average kimono." Kyoya pointed out.

Yumi turned back to him with a raised eyebrow. "Kyoya-san. There's no point in going to a summer festival if you're not going to show some leg." She deadpanned, completely seriously. She might act more put together than the girls the club was used to but she was still a girl and she was fairly girly. She liked dressing up and looking good although formal wear wasn't really her style. Yumi also was aware that her legs were one of her better assets. Also, she liked embarrassing boys with such old fashioned sensibilities.

The twins staggered back. The image of Yumi in a short kimono danced like a vision in their head, not quiet in focus but just enough for them to get a taste for the idea. If there was one quality Yumi had on Haruhi (besides bra size) it was her nice legs.

Haruhi led Yumi off so they could struggle with their cosplay together.

"We can get it cut Kyoya!" The twins insisted.

Kyoya shot them a disapproving look. "Not in time and showing female skin isn't going to help the club."

"I swear," Kaoru shook his head. "It's like you're a robot." Hikaru finished.

"Eeeh? I wanna see Yu-chan in a short kimono! She'd be super cute!" Mitsukuni insisted, popping up into their corner of the conversation.

"What are you shady twins talking about!" Tamaki snapped, catching wind of what the conversation was about. "You stay the hell away from my imōto!" He caught Hikaru by the collar of his kimono. Then the fight broke out.

"Seriously? I leave for like five minutes and you're trying to kill each other?" Yumi emerged from the changing area, hands on her hips. She gave Tamaki and twins a disapproving look. The kimono was plain: an off white with dark brown barren trees for the pattern. Some were starting to bud a pale pink. It painted a picture of a thawing winter. The white accented Yumi's darker skin. It didn't make her look like a traditional beauty, like Haruhi, but it made her look a unique beauty which held a charm to it.

"Sugar." The twins gasped, looking at Haruhi, a picture of traditional though androgynous cuteness. "Spice." Now the twin's eyes were on Yumi, a more sultry and mature beauty.

"My daughter and my imōto look so cuuute!" Tamaki rushed to hug them. Yumi put up her hand. "If I have to fix my hair because of you, you won't like it." She promised. Tamaki slipped and went spiraling into his dark corner to pout.

"You look reaaaally cute, Yumi." Mitsukuni complimented skipping over now that Tamaki had been dealt with.

"Eh? You think?" Yumi tugged a loose strand of hair. "This really isn't my style. I was feeling a little uh… but… I'm glad you like it." She smiled, a faint blush dusted across her cheek.

Mitsukuni's heart stopped beating. Then it made up for lost time. He flung himself at her. "You're sooo cute Yu-chan!"

"Gah! I said thanks already! Don't mess up my hair!" Yumi complained, trying to will away the blush creeping up her neck.

"Hey we said looked cute too!" Hikaru protested. "Why didn't we get a cute confession like that!" Kaoru finished.

"You said I looked 'spicy'. What does that even mean?" Yumi rebuffed sticking out her tongue.

* * *

This was the second time Yumi was working in the Host Club and it was, remarkably, easier. Yumi no doubt owed that largely in part Emika who had gone out of her way to make everyone understand the situation. Speaking of Emika and her shadow Karin, Yumi spotted the girls in the entrance.

She smiled and walked over to greet them. "Welcome princesses, do you have a session with Haruhi-san today?"

The girls nodded. "Yes, we're a little early though. We can wait." Emika explained.

"Well, I just finished delivering the tea, so I can keep you company." Yumi smiled.

Karin flushed. "The room looks beautiful Yumi-san."

Yumi smiled at Karin's sincerity. "Thank you, though I can't take much credit. I don't have a grasp on this type of style yet, Kyoya-san was very instructive so I hope to get better." She smiled. "But I did do the flower arrangements. I used a few books that had been suggested to me, so the arrangements may be a little by the number. I'm not very good at ikebana yet."

"T-they're not amateur at all!" Karin denied. "If this you just starting off you're going to very accomplished!" She blushed when she realized how passionate she sounded.

Yumi blushed too. "Thank you Karin-san." She stumbled over her words, surprised by Karin's sincerity.

"You look very nice today, Yumi-san." Emiko spoke up, bringing attention away from Karin's flustered demeanor. "Very classy."

"Ah. I think I was supposed to blend in like a maid."

Emiko shook her head. "Your understated dress brings out your natural beauty. Whoever picked out your outfit is very talented and you wear it well."

Yumi was going to explode. "Well, I'm afraid I don't handle a candle to your girls beautiful selves." She smiled quickly deflecting. Emiko flushed suddenly, surprised to be on the receiving end.

Yumi lead the girls over to Haruhi missing another girl lingering behind the door.


End file.
